Day 7: Patience – Patience – Patience

A couple of days ago I wrote about the point of slowing down – you can read it here – and this blog will be somewhat of a sequel to that blog – because here I will expand on the point of patience.

Now – looking at my life I can see that one of my big weaknesses has been that I lack patience – this can be seen in how I in my life thwarted around and immersed myself in all kinds of interests and hobbies – and for a short while I was intently submerged into a point of interest – and with discipline and dedication I walked the point – but then I came to a point wherein I felt that “nothing is moving” – “I am not learning fast enough!” – “Why is it going so slow!?” – and within that – I almost always stopped participating in the point that I was pursuing; and then I went to the next point.

Further – I am also able to see my ineffectiveness of living patience in relation to how I approach new projects, and points in my world – I have a tendency to go completely one hundred percent into the point – completely dedicating myself to eat – yet doing this within a frantic hastiness – of “wanting to have results!” – “wanting to get there!” – and so I will usually attempt and try to advance and go beyond my abilities – and challenge myself – more than what I am actually capable of handling – and within doing that I will actually decrease my ability of walking the point – and in the long run compromise myself.

tumblr_lyqirs81EX1qjf359o1_500What is then being patient? And how do I live patience? For those of you reading this that has no concept of what patience is – or how to live – I suggest listening to this interview. Now – according what I’ve seen patience is being very meticulous, and certain – you’re walking each moment – breath by breath – and there is no haste – because within yourself you’re certain that no matter how long it takes – one day you’re going to get there – and thus patience is to take one’s time – and to be comfortable in accepting and allowing points to take time.

Within this I am able to see how I’ve in my process – as I began walking my process – not allowed myself to take the time to get to know the material – and to get to understand, and slowly integrate the understanding of what it means to walk self-honesty – and breath – instead I simply threw myself into process – and completely went for it one hundred percent – which is cool in itself – yet it’s quite important to within doing this still take into consideration myself – and what I am throwing myself into won’t necessarily be something that I can master, and learn to control in one minute – and that it’s unrealistic to have such expectations unto myself.

Thus – I am able to see that living patience will make my life a lot more comfortable – and my process a lot more relaxed so to speak – wherein I accept and allow myself to walk each point that arise in my mind in specificity – in detail – slowly but surely – not trying to walk faster – and not trying to walk slower – merely walking in breath – walking each point until that point is clear – and corrected and then taking the next.

Self-forgiveness

1. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define patience as a weakness – as something that will only slow me down – and slow my progress down – and make me be able to do less in this life – complete less – and achieve less – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand – that patience is really the key to being able to master – and perfect really difficult points – and create points that are sound – that are whole – and do not have any mistakes – because I’ve been patient in walking the point

2. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to approach myself, and points in my world from a starting point of forceful hastiness – as “wanting to get things done now” – “Wanting to not waste time – but to move on and take on the next point!” – instead of accepting and allowing myself to see, realize and understand that I am really not wasting my time in being patient with myself – I am in-fact using the time effectively – because I am walking here accepting and allowing myself to walk what is relevant – and what is effective for me to walk – and not walk above my capabilities – and try to be somewhere else but here in this moment with and as my human physical body

3. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to approach new situations from a starting point of forceful hastiness – as feeling that unless I walk this point fast – and time-effectively – I am going to loose my life to this point and be able achieve less in my life – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be so focused upon achieving – getting there – doing that – completing that – becoming a success in that – that I’ve not accepted and allowed myself to smell the roses – and the be with my breath – and to walk slowly but surely – not trying do everything at once – but to see that I am only able to do as much as a breath here allows for

4. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not live patience – as in accepting and allowing myself to embrace failure – to be completely calm and stable in facing failure – and to simply see that I require to go back to the drawing board – and look at how I manifested this failure – and then face the point again – and being within this calm – and eternally patient – as in seeing that I will walk this particular point for myself into and as eternity if it’s required – until I do perfect this point

5. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as, and move from a starting point of trying to save my time – and trying to protect myself from loosing time – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it’s impossible to save time – as time will inevitably pass – though what is possible is to live within oneness and equality here with and as time – walking breath by breath – and using that time that is HERE effectively – instead of trying to save time; as such I commit myself to use the time that is here effectively – through being fully here – and accepting and allowing myself to walk the points that open and emerge here – fully – wholesomely – and completely – without separating myself in my mind as “places I have to go, and things I have to do” – but remaining here

Self-commitments

1. When and as I see that I am looking at, and defining patience as a weakness – as something that will slow me down – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand – that patience is something that the mind resists – because patience implies being specific – physical – and HERE – and walking each moment that open up here in oneness and equality with the physical – with and as the detail of this physical moment here – and not spend time in my mind – as such I commit myself to be patient here with and as myself – and walk each moment in oneness and equality with and as my human physical body – and be aware of the details of this moment here

2. When and as I see that I am approaching points in my world from a starting point of forceful hastiness – as “wanting to get things done now” – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that – in approaching situations, and new points from this starting point – I am in-fact debilitating my ability to learn – expand – and grow with and as the point that I am facing – and I am instead running through the point – in-fact running past the point and into the wall on the other side; as such I commit myself to stop running inside myself – to stop forcing points – and instead accept and allow myself to be here with and as the natural flow of the moment – as the flow of a breath – in and out – in and out

3. When and as I see that I am approaching a new situation from a starting point of forceful hastiness – as feeling that unless I walk this point fast – and time-effectively – I am going to loose my life to this point and be able to achieve less in my life – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that – the only point that I am able to loose is myself – and I will loose myself through not being HERE – present – breathing – and aware of myself as my human physical body – that is when I loose myself for real – as such I commit myself to stop loosing myself through going into stress – and fear – and running inside my mind – and instead spend each moment to find myself here – within and as my human physical body – here as breath

4. When and as I see that I am not accepting and allowing myself to live patience – as I am facing failure – and as I see that I’ve not taken into account particular points and this caused me to make a mistake; I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand – that patience is the key in relation to perfecting skills, abilities, and points in this reality – patience – and persistence – keeping at it – and not giving into giving up; as such I commit myself to be patient – to set long term goals – and not be shortsighted as the mind – but to see that certain points will take a long time to put into practice – and there is nothing bad, or wrong about that

5. When and as I see that I am participating, and moving myself from within and as a starting point of trying to save my time – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that time can’t be saved – time can be lived – but it can’t be saved – and living time is something that is a decision in every moment – as deciding that I am present here in this very moment – and that I am living and expressing myself here; as such I commit myself to live time – stop searching for, and attempting save time – but to instead use the time here through practicing being present and aware in every moment of breath

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2 thoughts on “Day 7: Patience – Patience – Patience

  1. Pingback: Dag 234: Kroppen Min – Magrutor (Del 21) | Viktor Persson

  2. Pingback: Day 9: They Are Out To Get Me! | Viktor Persson

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