During this last week I’ve had a couple of instances where I forget things, or miss things, or make unnecessary and preventable mistakes, and I looked at where this came from – and I saw that it came from a tendency I have to think about, analyze, and become preoccupied with events and situations that occur in my life.
For example, as I was eating together with a couple of friends, I was discussing and sharing some realizations that I have had, and as the moment was done – and I was supposed to move into a new moment, with my full awareness, and presence being here with me, I instead started to think about, analyze, and pick apart the moment that had already passed, which had the consequence of me not being aware, present, and able to direct the new moment that had entered my world.
What I want to practice living is focus, as well as presence, and live that in such a way, so that when I am done with a moment, I unconditionally move myself to the next moment, and completely let go of the past – and then – if I decide to do so – I can revisit the moment that had passed when I am in a position to do so, for example, as I am lying in my bed, ready to go to sleep, or sitting by my computer writing myself out – though – it’s not appropriate or effective to look at passed moments when I am in the middle of my life, having responsibilities and commitments that I require to direct, to in such a moment start looking at a past moment – because in those situations I require to have my entire awareness and presence here with my human physical body – and with what I am doing here – if I don’t I can obviously manifest dire consequences for myself, which is not necessary at all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I require to be present, aware and here when and as I am moving myself throughout my life, and that it can have consequences if I do not push myself to remain here – within and as breath – moving myself with what is here and having full attention upon my physical body – and my physical world – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hang unto past moments, and take past moments into my mind and start to analyze them, and think about them, and pick them apart, instead of moving myself HERE within and as breath, within and as my human physical body
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate my attention from myself, my physical body, and my physical world, through participating in a state of analyzing, and picking apart past moments, and evaluating my performance in these moments, instead of realizing, that this is a thing that I can’t do when I walk in my life, and participate in this reality, because I require to be on my toes, cautious and present of what is going on, and if I don’t push myself to walk this I will create consequences for myself, which is totally unnecessary, because I can just immediately apply and walk this realization that when I am out and about, moving and participating, I require to have my presence HERE on what I am doing in this very moment
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that when I fall in a moment, I can’t start thinking about it, because that might have consequences, as I require to be here in my world, and direct myself to take care of my responsibilities, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not direct myself to give me some time each day where I do allow myself to bring up past moments, and look at who I am within them, and look at corrections, and solutions, that I am able to apply to correct these moments and who I am within them
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to let go of each moment that I’ve lived, no matter how reactive I’ve been in that moment, to let it go, and then at a later stage, when I do have the time, and when the situation is appropriate, to bring myself back to that moment, and walk it through, and define a correction and solution for myself
I commit myself to practice letting go of past moments immediately as I’ve walked them through, and bring myself back here to what I am doing, and be here in the present with myself, and have my complete attention here on what I am doing
I commit myself to direct myself to give myself the time each day to look at my day, to look at reactions, and experiences, and define solutions, and corrections for myself – and thus – make sure that I directively make the decision to bring a past moment here for me to look at it and walk through in writing and self-forgiveness
I commit myself to live focus practically in my world, through making sure that I have my attention placed HERE on what I am doing in every moment, and make sure that I don’t preoccupy myself with anything in my mind, but that my complete presence, and awareness is instead located, and focused, and placed here with myself