Day 174: What Are My Projections Telling Me About Myself?

I’ve been applying and walking this point of stopping projections and fears coming up in relation to possible future outflows and events – I’ve found that it’s difficult to stop myself and I see that there are dimensions of this point that I have not yet covered and walked through.

So, this dimension opened up when I discussed my projections with my future – she asked me: “How would you then feel within yourself if you manage to create your projections and make them real, what is that you see would come down the line?”

When I looked at this point, I could see that the primary reason wasn’t so much that it was practical, and it wasn’t so much about fear either, instead I could see that my projection and goal represented an experience and a certain presence – and primarily I saw that it had to do with certainty, self-trust, fulfillment and peace – being at ease with myself. Because when I answered the question, I said that: “fulfilling these plans would make me more comfortable and at ease with myself!” – so, obviously I realize that the point I am facing here is not that the projections are bad or wrong – instead these projections are consistently showing me that there is something I am not giving to myself in my daily living; namely being certain and at peace with myself – an existence free from uncertainty, worry and doubt.

Thus, I realize that my corrective application must contain this dimension of inserting a new programming, a new way of living, and this is something I must create and build for myself in my daily living – and apply myself as these words consistently and with discipline – certainty, self-trust and fulfillment – and thus resulting in me experiencing myself peaceful here.

In this blog I am going to walk through define my correction for myself – as well as forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to live these words in my daily life – the primary point here is to find physical corrections that I will be able to apply in my daily life so that I can actually direct and change this point.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my future projections are showing my parts of myself that I am not yet living and standing as in my daily life and daily living – that they are showing me the potential that I have here and that I am able to create in every moment of breath – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not fulfill my potential through practicing living certainty, fulfillment, self-trust in every moment of breath – living and applying these words for real as actually trusting myself that regardless of what might come and arise in my world I will direct and I will move the point

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I must physically change and direct myself to live self-certainty, which I must do through actually changing my thought patterns, my way of reasoning, and my way of looking at things, to instead of being based within and as fear, anxiety and inferiority, that I am looking at things, looking at my future within and as self-confidence, self-certainty, and self-trust, that I look at it from the starting point that I don’t fear walking into the unknown, that I don’t fear making mistakes, that I don’t fear fucking up – but that I instead trust myself, and direct myself to walk, and do what must be done

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look at my future from a starting point of fear and inadequacy – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to condition myself to look at things in my mind from within and as a starting point that “I won’t be able to do this” – and “I can’t handle this” – and thus within this make all of these subordinated plans and escape routes for IF everything goes to hell – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not instead trust myself – and rely upon myself that IF everything goes to hell – I will deal with it – I will direct it – and I will move and sort out the point and not accept and allow myself to go into inferiority and feeling less than – I will instead direct and move the point and not accept and allow myself to fall together and give up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into and as fear, anxiety, and worry towards the future – and within this make decisions, and look at my future from a starting point of inadequacy, and from a starting point of “I won’t make it” – and “I will not be able to deal with this and walk it through effectively” – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take a breath and stabilize myself here – and ask myself: If I remove all of the fear – all of the what if’s – all of the maybe’s – all of the nervousness – then what would be the most common sense decision that is best for all – what would be serve me and those that are in my reality?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not practice making decisions and moving myself into my future from a starting point of and as self-trust, self-certainty, and stability – knowing that whatever outflow – whatever consequence – whatever might develop and come out of my decisions – I will stand – I will move myself – and I will get things done – and I will not stop and hold back – and give up until I am through and I’ve stabilized myself and directed the situation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look at my future from within and a starting point of everything will work out perfectly – versus – everything will completely go to hell and not work whatsoever – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself and my participation – and instead of moving and directing myself in self-certainty – move myself from within and as a starting point of wanting to create a solution that will somewhat work for me – that will be somewhat effective – IF something will come up and emerge in my world that I have not control and power over

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move and motivate myself – and make decisions from within and as a fear of the future – and believe that the best decisions will come from within and as me making a decision that is based on fear – and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I am completely limited and withheld from making a decision that would contribute to my existence – as well as the existence of others – and that the best I can do in my life is to make sure that I survive and that I get through my day unharmed – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear making a decision to push and walk in my life not only for myself – but for everyone – and push myself to make the best out of my life – not from a starting point of fear – but from within and as a starting point of creating my life and living to be what is best for all – to be superb – to be the best that it can be – wherein I don’t accept and allow compromises in order to satisfy my fears

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that when I remove fear – my way of looking at and moving myself into the future is going to change – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not unconditionally ask myself – what is the best direction – what is the best movement – what is the best thing that I am able to do with myself during this coming time – what is it that I require to do – what is that I want to do? What is that I want to contribute? What is it that I want to create? And thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am not able to answer these questions through holding unto fear and anxiety – but that instead I must stand as self-certainty, self-will and self-motivation – and walk myself into my life and build – create – and establish my life – not from a starting point fear or anxiety – but from a starting point of creating a life for myself as well as others that is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not look at my future from a starting point of common sense – to remove the fear and to go into a silence within myself and look at the potential outflows – the potential points that might arise – the potential direction and possibilities and within this remove all fear and anxiety – remove nervousness – removing feeling less than and inferior and instead bring myself back here to and as my human physical body – and stand stable – certain and self-willed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the main-problem and issue that I am facing is not what decisions I am to make for my future – it’s rather WHO I AM within and as these decisions – WHO I AM within and as my human physical body – WHO I AM within and my daily living – and I see, realize and understand that I must make a plan – that fits into my general direction and Desteni that I am creating for myself – and then stick with this plan and walk it through – and not accept and allow my plan to be based upon fear and anxiety – but rather base my plan upon common sense as what I see makes sense and will produce an effective outcome for my future life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel and experience as if there is something missing within me and my life – as if there is something in my general movement and participation that is lacking – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think – perceive and believe that I must make up for this through becoming someone else – through building skills and achieving great marks and becoming ranked as being one of the absolute best – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear becoming seen as one of the absolute least effective – being regarded as having no value and no meaning and no purpose – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live from a starting point of protecting myself from the future and from this eventual play-out of becoming nothing at all – of being nobody at all – of loosing myself and being considered a failure

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when and as I look at my future, to look at it from within and a starting point of energy, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that when I look at a point from within this starting point, I am limiting my perspective, and my view of the point to only see some aspects, and some dimensions, and I don’t see the entirety, and I don’t see how it will influence and affect all of my life – all of my world – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that one of the reasons as to why I don’t experience certainty, and self-trust, and live these words as myself – is because I don’t accept and allow myself to look at the entirety and the complete picture of my world – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to look at all aspects and dimensions of a point when I make a decision – so that I am certain as to what I am creating for myself and whether what I am creating is actually something that I can stand by and that I do want to create and bring into my life and bring into creation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that self-trust and self-certainty arises from me taking responsibility for my life and giving myself direction – and being clear upon what is that I want to create – what is that I want to build and what it is that I want to formulate in my life – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the solution is not go into fear, and build my life from fear, but instead look at common sense, look at what I am able to do, and how I am able to form and shape my life in order to make a difference not only for myself but for others in my life – and thus I commit myself to make this my goal and direction in life – to make a difference not only for myself but also for others – to create solutions that are best for all – and to measure my decisions – to measure my applications – to measure my life from this starting point – where is it that I am able to have an impact – and how am I able to bring forth and integrate such an impact in my life and make it a living reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push and will myself to live and participate from within and as self-certainty and self-trust – and I see, realize and understand that the one point that I require to create and live for myself is trusting myself and that I will direct my life – and create my life – and build my life – regardless of what – regardless of what consequences – regardless of what happens – I will stand – stabilize myself – and find solutions – and thus I commit myself to practice this point of living the wordBe still and know that I am god” – and push myself to find solutions – to find ways to get through and move myself – and define solutions for myself – define ways in which I am able to formulate solutions that will work for everyone and that will birth outflows that will have an effect upon everyone that is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold unto memories of my past of me failing within certain subjects in school, and in that hearing the voices of my parents saying to me that if I fail with my school I will fail with my life, and I will not able to make anything of myself, and my life, and my world, and my reality will come to nothing whatsoever – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into fear – to go into anxiety – worry and nervousness – and build my life from this fear that my life might come to nothing – that my life might end up being worthless and without purpose – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not instead insert and live the direction of myself in my life of living in every moment – of being here within and as breath – of having a plan because it’s practical yet not becoming possessed with and controlled by that plan but realizing that life is HERE – that life must walked – lived and created on a moment to moment basis – and that I will never be able to with certainty know and predict exactly how everything will come to pass – instead this is something that I must walk in every moment – and my process will unfold on a breath per breath basis – and thus I commit myself to walk this point of unfolding my process and my life on a breath per breath basis – of having a plan but not being controlled and possessed with the plan – of having a goal but not being possessed with the goal

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that clarity, and direction, and movement, and knowing who I am, where I will go, what I will create, and what I will manifest in this life, will only arise, and come through when and as I let go of fear – when and as I stop fear and bring myself back here and instead of existing in a constant stress and tension towards my future – that I instead direct – move and live myself into creation in every moment of breath; and thus I commit myself to practice this point for the coming week – of sticking with my plans – walking with them – and only changing them or re-directing them when and as it’s not anymore possible or relevant to follow through on them – and then if that occurs look at my world – change – yet not accept and allow this to change who I am – because I am not my plan – the plan is but a plan and not who I am – as I am here as the breath of life in every moment of breath

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see that I am going into fear of the future, into this point of creating a plan for myself in the hopes of finding certainty, stability and trust somewhere out there in a distant and far out projected future – I immediately stop myself, I breathe and I bring myself back here – and I commit myself to stop the fear, to stop the projection – and to support myself in this – I commit myself to practice living self-trust here – to practice living and directing my life in the moment HERE – and not anymore rely upon fear, imaginations, projections, worries and anxieties to move myself – but instead to move myself HERE – to direct myself HERE

I commit myself to align my future to exist within and as – and from the starting point of creating a difference for everyone – and thus take the world – humanity – everyone into consideration in regards to my future decisions – and as such not anymore be possessed and controlled within and as this personal self-interest and the fears involved in not being able to fulfill my self-interest – thus I commit myself to expand my sphere of influence to as such extend to this world – nature – my partner – my cats – the group I am walking with – and thus change the ME to being a WE – and deliberately push this point through changing my thinking patterns and the way I look at things – to involve more dimensions – more aspects – more outflows – more consequences – and learn to see how one decision will ripple throughout this world and what that one decision will create

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3 thoughts on “Day 174: What Are My Projections Telling Me About Myself?

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  2. Pingback: Day 180: Becoming Something Or Being Something | Viktor Persson

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