Category Archives: Creating Movement

Day 276: Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

One point that is missed by many of us, that wish to change a pattern of laziness, or demotivation, into movement, and self-creation, is that we forget to look at the rewards that will come due to such a change that we make. And because of this, the focal point of our decision to change ourselves becomes ‘the problem’ and ‘the ton of shit we must walk through to change’. Thus, when we decide to change, it is important that we clarify for ourselves what the rewards of that change will be; what are we going to get out of changing? What will we be able to create, how will our lives change, and how will the experience of ourselves change?

Why is that then important? Because if you do not establish what you will get out of changing, you will not have that drive, and motivation to keep at it, to keep moving forward, to push through even though it at times might feel hard, and overwhelming. The reward is your carrot; it is the fuel that you inject into yourself that will keep you afloat when you feel like sinking back into a comfortable state of laziness, and apathy. It is in that moment your reward will come up within you, and within that you will be able to see the value you will be creating for yourself if you walk the talk, push through, and realize your decision for yourself.

Hence, before you start your process of self-change, and walking through your established behaviors of laziness and apathy, take a moment with yourself, sit down, and look at what will change in your world when you bring the decision you are about to make into reality. For example, you will now be able to do all those things that you before tended to procrastinate, immediately, and within that you will get more time with yourself, where you will be able to sit back, relax, and with a clear conscience, dedicate yourself to your hobbies. Then, your relationships will improve, because people will now notice your change, and see that you are more dependable, reliable, and trustworthy, and this might also impact on your career and job opportunities.

When you change yourself, you will also be able to stand as an example for others, and show them how it’s possible to redesign, and reinvent yourself, and you can share your story of how you went from a coach potato into actually doing something with your life, to the benefit of yourself and others as well. Because, we need more of these people in this world, we need more people that show others that change is possible, and that we do not have the stick to the limiting behaviors, and routines that we accepted and allowed ourselves to develop as we grew up and came of age. And, we need more people that actually care about themselves enough that they decide to do something with their lives, and push through the difficulties and hardships that might arise as one make a decision to bring an idea into reality.

Thus, remember, when you make the decision to change, you are not only doing it for yourself. You will influence and have an impact on many, and many of those that you inspire, you will probably not be aware of, but within them you are going to create that small burst of excitement, and awaken that slumbering voice, saying: “What if I could change? What if I could become as effective as he/she?” – and being able to awaken that latent urge to expand is an awesome gift that you are able to give.

With this blog I am concluding my series on Creating Movement. I hope you have enjoyed this series of blogs and found some inspiration to start your own process of self-change. I know that it is possible, I have myself been a lazy person, and now I am not – and that was a change that I managed to bring through by following the steps that I have outlined in these series blogs. Becoming a motivated and driven human being is thus not something you must be born with, it can be created, and that is the beauty of life – we can create and bring into reality that which we see is supportive, and remove that which we see is destructive. Laziness and apathy are destructive forces, both on a personal, and existential level, because when there is no drive, and motivation to push forward – how can we create the best possible life for ourselves and each-other? It is simply not possible. As such, get yourself in gear and develop that motivation and drive – we are all able to do this for ourselves.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

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Day 268: Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change

baby_stepsIn my last blog in the ‘Creating Movement’-series I ended off with saying that in this blog I was going to cover the Rewards of changing apathy, and laziness into movement. Since then I have realized that there is an important point that must be covered before we go into the dimension of the Rewards. That is why, in this blog, we are going to looking at the point of implementing change through the use of the Baby Steps-method.

A commonly occurring pattern in us human beings, is that when we want to change something – let us say laziness – we want to change it ALL and preferably from one day to the next. We write, or speak these solemn words, were we promise to ourselves that change will be implemented, change will come through, and whether it is the last thing we do, we will make it happen. Fascinatingly enough, when the time to change is here, and we are supposed to live, and implement our words, we fall, and cannot manifest our intention into physical reality. Then, the next stop on the ferries wheel is that we judge ourselves, and we speak seriously about our failure, and damn our mistakes: “Why is not possible for me to change?” is voiced, or thought, almost as a form of prayer to a higher entity that is seemingly taking a great joy in seeing us struggle.

Conclusion: This way of approaching change is not sustainable, and neither does it make change easy or enjoyable. Instead change becomes a pressure and a burden, and when we fall it becomes an excuse for us to judge ourselves – and this might eventually lead us to completely give up on ourselves and the change we desire. Thus, a much more effective, and productive way to approach change is through taking Baby Steps – and this means that instead of trying to change it ALL, and in one go – we instead change one small part of the pattern. We place our focus and attention on one aspect of the issue we have, and commit ourselves to change this first instead of taking on the entire pattern in one go.

Let me share an example with you: When I was studying, I had a tendency to every morning as I got up, and sat down by my desk to study, to after a while feel tired, and then proceed to the sofa and continue my studies there. Now, this always, without exception lead me to falling asleep, and also to retain information less effectively, and accordingly I wanted to change this pattern for myself, and thus sit by my desk when I studied. I first tried to change the pattern all in one go, but the temptation to sit/lie down in my coach was too big, and so I fell. Even though I wanted to change myself, the sofa just felt so comfortable and nice, and I was not willing to give it up.

Then I started to approach the change slightly differently, instead of wanting to change the entire pattern all in one go, I decided to, while in the sofa, sit up a little more straight, and practice focusing on what I was reading. This change I managed to pull through, because it was just a matter of pushing myself up against the backrest of the sofa a few centimeters. When I had that point down, after a while, what started to take place was that I went to my desk to study instead. I didn’t even make it an actual decision within myself to ‘not study in the couch’ – though because I had managed to pull through the change of sitting a little bit more straight, and focusing more clearly on the text, when reading in the sofa, this made it a lot easier for me to from there, move to actually sit by my desk. And this is the principle of Baby Steps – you place your change into creation using small incremental steps – one by one – and the common sense behind this goes again in all forms of change.

For example: If you wish to be able to run a marathon, and you’ve never jogged before, it would be a wise call if you first learned to, and worked up the stamina to jog. Only after that should you try to run. And if we look at school, there is a gradual increase in difficulty level – and this can be seen in most types of activities. Though strangely enough, many of us forget to apply the Baby Steps-mentality when it is comes to self-change, and changing a compromising pattern within ourselves into a supportive. Though, the fact of the matter is that, they are the same – no difference.

So, let us be patient with ourselves, give ourselves some slack, and when we change from laziness/apathy into movement, that we do it in incremental steps – little by little – challenge by challenge – decision by decision. Even though the change might feel as if it is moving too slow when you move forward with Baby Steps – it does not – because when we change using baby steps we know that we are going to get through. While, when we try to do that one, big momentous change, the probability is that we are going to fall, and then, in worst-case scenario, simply give up on our change and what we wanted for ourselves.

In my next blog, instead of discussing rewards, I am going to look more closely into how we tend to moralize change, and through that create even more resistance within ourselves when it comes to actually transforming our living actions to be supportive and nourishing.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 261: Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance

In this blog we are going to look closer at some practical solutions for resistance, that I have found works effectively. There are four applications that I have discovered helps a lot when that resistance comes up from within – and I will be walking through them in order.

Be clear on you new direction

The first solution is to be clear on your direction. In order to be able to walk through that tough, and difficult moment, when the resistance comes up, and you do not feel like doing anything, it is important that you have your direction in place. Basically this means the following: You know WHY you are changing, you know HOW you are going to change, you know WHAT will happen if you do not change (consequences) and you know WHAT will happen if you change (rewards).

If you are not clear on these points within yourself, you are going to find it much easier to give in, and give up when the resistance towards movement comes up from within. The reason for this being that you have not established a purpose, and reason for yourself, you are trying to change something, yet you are not entirely clear on why, how and what you are changing. Thus, my suggestion is that you sit down with yourself, and write out your reasons for changing.

Lets take an example from my own life, my law-studies. Now I experienced resistance towards studying and reading the course literature, though I knew that I had to do it in order to be able to pass my exams. Thus, I wrote about the point and established the following: I am changing this resistance into actually reading my books BECAUSE (why) I want to be able to earn my living as a lawyer. I will change this resistance through (how) sitting down and reading my books for two hours every day. If I do not do this for myself, I might not be able to pass my exams, and thus I cannot become a lawyer (consequence). Though if I do sit down and read the literature, I will pass my exams, and be able to have a enjoyable and challenging job in my future (reward).

Placing it before myself in this way I was able to clearly see the value in changing myself, and why I had to do it – and this helped me to push through in those moments when I did not feel like reading or putting down any time in my education.

Stick with your body

The next solution is to Stick With Your Body. Now, what does that mean? Well, look at it this way: Resistance is a energy that comes up from within, telling you to act and behave in a certain way – and this energy will feel real and overpowering when you go into it, start feeding it, paying attention to it, and change yourself according to it. But, if we take a look at your physical body – you will see that regardless of the resistance that comes up within you, it will still be there, the heart will still be beating, lungs and breathing working perfectly – most parts of the body will be stable, still and the same as before the resistance – and this is important to notice.

Resistance as such does not affect the body and instead the body moves itself on the basis of practical considerations, and if it would not do that – we would be dead a long time ago. Thus, if you, instead of going into the resistance energy, place your focus and attention on your breathing, and the sensations of your physical body – this will allow you to use the body as a point of grounding/stabilization. And when you stand with the body, on the ground, you are going to notice a fascinating thing: The resistance does not have power over you – it is only a energy – and regardless of its intensity you are still able to decide on how you move within and as your human physical body.

To sum it up: The body/physical matter transcends resistance – and when you stand with the body – you will be able to use its stability and groundedness to support yourself to move through the resistance and come out on the other side.

Know your enemy

The third solution is to know your enemy, and with this I do not mean that you should go into war with resistance and your mind – no – what I mean is that it is important to understand how resistance moves, and when it moves. My observations on this point is that resistance moves in quickly, and will peak after a while, but if you continue to move through the resistance, it will run out of fuel and die out. As such – resistance does not last – it has a due date and if you stick to your guns, and continue to move, resistance does not stand a chance.

Accordingly it has been supportive to me to, every time a resistance comes up within me, say to myself that: ‘Okay, here are you resistance – though you will not be here for ever!’ – and then I continue to push and walk through the experience. This helps because you get to understand that even though it feels overwhelming and tough, there will come a moment when the resistance is going to dissipate and you will be home through.

And then – its also supportive to know WHEN the resistance usually arise, because then you will be prepared, you will know what is coming, so that you can implement your new direction immediately as you sense that lingering urge to just not do whatever it is that you are supposed to be doing.

Just do it

The last point, and possibly the most potent of all the solutions I have walked through, and by far the most simplistic, is to: Just do it. No rocket science here – though fascinatingly enough – we tend to forget this fact and instead of moving, and directing ourselves in the physical, we start asking ourselves why we do not change, if there is something we have missed, or if there is something wrong with us, because we just cannot seem to change. I am here to tell you that there is nothing wrong with you; all you have to do is to do it. When you resist something, you take a breath, and move yourself to do it. It cannot be simpler.

So, when you find that you are wondering, or looking at potential reasons as to why you are not becoming more disciplined, then you know that ‘Shit! I am not actually DOING it!’ – and this serves as a nice alarm to know that its now time for you to get on with the doing – stop thinking about it – Just do it!

Next blog

So, these are my four practical solutions for dealing with resistance. Test them out, play around with them, and see what works for you. Maybe you will find that a combination of the applications or slightly changed application will work better for you. Transcending and learning to direct resistance is a personal process, and thus what works for me, does not necessarily have to work for you – though at least you know have some basic tools that you are able to start with.

In my next blog I am going to go into and explain the Rewards that come when you start moving through resistance, and begin your life of self-creation – it is a truly remarkable experience and the blog will definitely be worth reading.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 258: Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance

In my past blogs in the Creating Movement Series I have gone into my own history with laziness, and also looked at some of the causes behind this particular mind construct. In this blog I will start to go through the practical solutions that I applied to walk through and direct laziness, and transform it into motivation, discipline and steadfastness. From my own experience, in order to change laziness, one of the most important points to get to grips with, and become comfortable with directing is resistance – because when you decide to change laziness into something more productive – you will face resistance and lots of it.

The usual and learned response to resistance is to simply back off – if we resist something it means bad news, discomfort, and pain. This is unfortunate, because as a matter of fact, any form of change is nearly always accompanied with resistance. In-fact this resistance can be seen in nature, as a natural law, when a object is in motion, and you try to stop it, and move it in another direction, you will experience that physical force fighting with you, until you stop it, and then move it in the direction that you want it. All motion has a force to it, and when we try to change it, there will be a period of discomfort – the same goes with changing laziness into motivation, self-discipline, and steadfastness.

Thus, the first point to master is resistance. And in the beginning of my process of changing laziness I experienced immense amounts of resistance the moment I stood before an opportunity to act, or I faced a responsibility that I had to tend to. There was not a single cell in my body that wanted to move forward, and with each step that I took, my body felt heavier, and heavier. It felt as if the only right thing to do was to go back to the sofa or bed, to simply not change this laziness, because the thought emerged: How can I ever push through this resistance, how can I ever become effective, and productive, when this heavy experience is following me with every step that I take?

Resistance however, even though it might feel intolerable, and create the illusion that it is impossible to go any further, will pass; it will lessen, and eventually disappear. This is due to the nature of resistance, because in essence resistance is energy – and no energy has a substance and solidity that can be compared with that of the human physical body. Thus physical self-directed movement will always come out on top of the resistance, though to reach that transcendence – you will have to walk through the moment when it feels impossible. The fascinating thing is that when you push through that experience of ‘it is impossible – I can not go on any more!’ – you will see that it is only a thought, only a illusion conjured by the mind, and that it is in-fact possible to move forward, to move ahead, even though it feels impossible.

So, when the resistance comes up, it helps a lot to have this understanding, that eventually the resistance will settle, and then you will be able to do what you set out to do without any experience hindering your progress. It is so fascinating to look back at my past, and see how much it was that I resisted: I resisted cleaning, resisted writing, resisted school, resisted reading, resisted exercise, resisted being social, etc. Today, there is none, or very slight resistance towards these things – why? Because I consistently pushed myself through the resistance, I consistently reprogrammed myself, and decided for myself that resistance is not going to hold me back – I will push through it when it comes up – and thus resistance lost its meaning and purpose – there is no room for resistance anymore because I have replaced it with words/expressions that are beneficial for myself, and others – such as motivation, self-discipline, and steadfastness.

As such – we are all able to push through resistance. Though, it does take practice, and I myself have fallen many times, given up, given in, went to bed, slept over, because I felt overpowered by the resistance. And here is another thing to remember, that it does not help to be hard on yourself when you fall, rather, stand up again, look at why the fall occurred – and move forward. Eventually you will not fall anymore, though there is a process to be walked until one is able to get to that point where the trust exists within self that each time resistance comes up – I will push through.

In my next blog I will walk through the Practical Solutions that I have found for handling and directing resistance.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 251: Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes

I have met many people that are like I was before, that tell me that they just do not have the motivation to do anything with their lives. For example, we can sit and have a discussion about a point that they would like to pursue – and then they will end it off with: “But I simply don’t have the energy to make it happen!” – and this lack of energy is what I will discuss in this blog – and this is what I define as a internal cause of laziness = the belief that we require energy to move.

I remember how it was when I grew up – for most of the times I was one of those that simply didn’t have the energy to pursue any long term goals. Some of my friends would push themselves in school to excel, or dedicate their leisure time to extra curricular activities, or get extra jobs to earn money in order to buy things that they dreamed of having. I on the other hand was content with what I had, and I didn’t particular feel any need to excel in school, neither did I experience any drive towards pursuing extra curricular activities. For a large part of my life I believed that this was just who I was – I was someone that didn’t have the energy – I was a laid back person – I was a person that was content with what I had and felt no need to prove myself in this world with regards to career, job, or expanding myself in taking on more responsibilities and projects. Now what we tend to do when are born with this disposition, is that we define ourselves as someone that simply doesn’t have the capacity/motivation to pursue projects and create points.

And then on the other hand, we have the kind of person that will forcefully drive themselves in school, in sports, in extra curricular activities. They seem to be like machines, with some form of eternal source of energy that just makes march forward, get things done, start projects, and finish projects. And for those of us with the more laid back kind of disposition, we look on in wonder and can’t help but asking ourselves: “How do they do it? Where do they get that drive? Why can they just keep on going like that?” – and at least I stopped my line of reasoning with concluding that I can’t do what they are doing – I simply do not have the drive. In-fact, I couldn’t get my head around how they even did what they were doing – to me it seemed like an impossible feat.

So, what is it then that drives this other type of person? Well – it’s actually stress and anxiety – and this is where most of us with the more lazy and laid back personality make our big mistake, that is what I did; we believe that there is simply something missing in us and that this is why we do not move. We believe that there is a problem with us, some kind of a flaw, something that is inherently wrong with us – and that we thus are not capable or able to move and create our lives. So, because we don’t have any experience of a motivation, or experience of a drive, we decide to simply not do that much. To move through life, doing only what is required, so we can do the things we enjoy – this is obviously a big mistake.

The reality of the situation is that we are able to create ourselves, and build momentum on a physical level WITHOUT any feeling or experience of motivation. For MOVEMENT we do not need motivation – we only require ourselves to stand with our physical body and make the DECISION to move – and then LIVE that decision. Thus, it’s fascinating to see how I was able to walk through most of my life being unaware of this point – that I don’t require energy to create my life. In the following blogs I will walk into the practical creation process of how movement is created on a physical level – and here I will share my own process of self-creation and how I managed to create and birth movement in my life without any experience of motivation what so ever.

The following interviews walk through the topic discussed in this blog

https://eqafe.com/p/stress-the-history-origin-and-nature-atlanteans-part-97

https://eqafe.com/p/stress-personality-development-part-1-atlanteans-part-98

https://eqafe.com/p/stress-personality-development-part-2-atlanteans-part-99

https://eqafe.com/p/stress-sounding-self-forgiveness-atlanteans-part-100

https://eqafe.com/p/stress-practical-living-support-atlanteans-part-101

More blogs in this series of Creating Movement

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 249: Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes

girlinwoods-1080x675Many times when we meet people, we tend to be quick to judge. After a glance, a short conversation, or meeting, we believe that we know who someone is, and we treat him or her accordingly. The fascinating thing however, is that we rarely take time to really understand another person. Obviously, the guy that went out and robbed some old lady did not become a robber overnight – all of our decisions, and the characters we live on a daily basis are created through a process of time and space. We face certain points, difficulties, challenges, or realize aspects about life, and we make changes in our way of living. This is the process of creation all human beings go through, and that is most noticeable during the teenage years.

Now, why do I bring up this point? Because it is important to understand that I was not born lazy, I wasn’t born apathetic, this was pattern I came to create through a process of time and space. I faced certain points in my life; from there I evaluated the information and made decisions that were not effectively aligned to my physical reality. Thus to say that I was just one of those ‘spoiled’ kids that didn’t want to do anything with his life is a generalization, and a simplification, and doesn’t give justice to what actually happened, and is nowhere near laying all the facts on the table. In this blog, thus, I am going to deeper into the fundamental bricks that led me to create a character of laziness and apathy, and primarily focus on the external causes the lead to laziness and apathy, which most of the times origin in the parent-child relationship. Hence, this blog will be of assistance and support for parents and others that can’t understand why their child, or someone in their life, is lazy, and indifferent.

Lack of responsibility

A friend of mine once told me that: “When you create something, you must give it responsibility”. This is very true, because without responsibility, you cannot grow or expand as a human being – without responsibility none of your actions have consequence, and regardless of what you do, it doesn’t feel as if it is for real. This is a mistake that a tremendous amount of parents do – they are afraid of giving their children responsibility, and this in turn creates consequences, which happened to me when I was a child.

Now, giving responsibility does not imply trying to control your child to do what you want – it doesn’t imply that you must threaten your child to follow through on their commitments. Giving responsibility implies a process of education, where the child or teenager learns to see and understand the nature of consequence and how this is something we create through our actions and inactions. Most parents are not sufficiently trained to educate their children in how consequences are created, and due to this they will attempt to develop conscience and responsibility in their child utilizing manipulation, fear and rewards. Unfortunately, these methods does not direct the origin of the issue, which is that the child haven’t formed an ability to understand the role they play in their environment, and how their life affect the lives of others.

Thus, what I have found in my research into laziness, and apathy, is that one of the primary causes of this behavioral dysfunction, is lack of responsibility, or rather, a lack of understanding responsibility. In my case this was a pattern that developed due to how my parents saw me, and in turn treated me – and basically they never gave me any responsibility of my own. No matter what I did, in the end, I always did it for someone other than myself – and my motivation to do it was so that I would not get punished, or so I would get a reward – hence not because I actually understood what I was doing.

It is clear that I can’t blame my parents for this, because my parents were not shown this area of child education by their parents. In-fact most people do not grow up until they get children of their own. Only then they realize their responsibility towards their environment, and are basically forced to snap out of any tendency to slack or be lazy. Though this can all be avoided through making sure that we give responsibility to our children – which basically entails seeing and making them equal to ourselves – were we give them charge of a certain point and then assist and support them to walk through the point and in that grow, and realize their interconnectedness with other parts of life.

Affluence

If you take a look at the first world countries, and the teenagers in these countries, and compare them to teenagers living in developing countries, you will many times notice a fascinating difference. The youngsters growing up in a developing country are oftentimes more mature, self-independent, self-reliant, and strong – have a goal set in mind and are daily motivating themselves to create their goal. This is maturity that very few teenagers, and youngsters acquire in the more affluent first world countries – and the cause of this is: Our relationship to money.

Taking myself as an example, I grew up in a family where all I had to do was point at something, and eventually I would get it. There was no effort, no movement, no willpower required for me to get what I wanted, what I wanted just came to me. Obviously my parents had good intentions, though the consequence was that I formed a misaligned relationship to self-creation and the point of building a life for myself in this world. Deep within me I formed an idea that things would just come to me, that my major life decisions would just be made for me, that my life would just easily flow forward, and become what I wanted it to become, without any effort, willpower or drive on my side. Undeniably, this is not how things work in actuality.

Though, I am not saying that children must be deprived of money, and that they have to work for their money to understand what money is and what role it plays in relation to self-creation. What I am saying is that most parents neglect the important point of early on showing their child the effort that is required to create your own path in life in relation to career, education, and other survival points – and why it is important to create a life for yourself. Due to this, children grow up oblivious of the tough reality that awaits them when their time in school is over, and because they are so used to get everything they want to, they do not have the skill of self-disciplined movement that is required to create something extraordinary.

Hence, when the parent steps in too much, and doesn’t assist and support the child to develop their own understanding and relationship to creation, money, career, and movement in the system – a consequence that forms is laziness, apathy and indifference in the child. This is what happened to me, and many of my friends – we simply did not have clear understanding of what is required to create for ourselves a supportive and enjoyable lifestyle in this world.

Lack of freedom

Another important aspect of how laziness and apathy is created, which also, most often, stems from the parent-child relationship, is lack of freedom. This point couples closely with lack of responsibility, though it is slightly different. The freedom I look at here is the freedom to make decisions, the freedom to make the wrong decisions, the freedom to choose your life, and what to create with it. Obviously, here, I am not saying that its supportive to just stand by and watch while someone is clearly abusing or creating severe consequences for themselves – it is instead important to step in and assist and support through sharing insights, and realizations than trying to force a change in the child.

In my own life, I didn’t have much freedom of my own – the simple reason being that my parents wanted to control most dimensions of my life. In particular they wished to control my plans for the future, my way of interacting with the world, my morals, my values, and my thinking processes. The consequence of this was that I in my teenage years went through the usual state of rebellion, where I basically started to create many consequences for myself, just to show my parents that I indeed had my freedom – that I was in control. And one of the points that I used to portray this apparent freedom of mine, was to show to others how I didn’t care about anything – how I was totally free from the control of others – apathy and laziness was thus a way for me to reject the adult world and achieve my freedom of choice.

The problem here is obviously that trying to live freedom in this way is very consequential, and it’s not even real freedom – what I lived out was more an attempt to SHOW others that I was free. Though was I then free to begin with? When my starting point was to prove to others that I was free? So, what is missing in the parent-child relationship, and what must be created for the child to not feel that they have to rebel in order to feel free, is that the child must be given the freedom to create their own lives from an early age. This freedom must entail, the freedom of making mistakes, the freedom of being different, and the freedom of not being/thinking/living like the parents.

Summary

In this blog I have investigated and shared some of the external causes of laziness and apathy in people. These causes are primarily found in the parent-child relationship and basically have the same origin point: The child is not assisted and supported to develop and nurture their own individual expression. Laziness is on a deep level a protest, a way of saying that, it doesn’t matter what I do, because someone is going to step in and make me do differently anyway. This is obviously a misconception, because as adults WE DO have the power to create our lives – but our childhood reminiscences have more power than what we are aware of – and there are many that can remain for an entire lifetime in a character of laziness and apathy. It doesn’t have to be this way, and in this series of blogs I am eventually going to walk through the process of correction, that will assist and support anyone stuck in a laziness-character, to step out of laziness and into self-movement.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 247: Creating Movement – Part 1

girl-261182_640This blog post will be the start of a series of blogs where I will share how I changed myself from being without movement and direction, to being motivated, driven, and proactive. I know that there are many out there like me – that just do not feel like doing anything – and I mean – literally nothing sparks an interest within you. In today’s society many view this state of apathy as a weakness, and also as an unchangeable aspect of the individual – a so-called characteristic. I have found these apparent facts to be merely beliefs, because truth is that everyone is capable of changing – AND – another surprising thing is that those caught in apathy and listlessness, in-fact have the greatest potential for change. The reason being that these people are able to CREATE their own definition of drive and movement, and become this movement as a self-expression – and this way of motion is vastly superior to any form of energetic movement that exists in our current society today, such as passion, excitement or desire.

The simple truth is that energetic motivation is a lie – an illusion – motivation isn’t ever needed for movement to be created – and this is basically the underlying realization that have guided me in my process of transcending laziness, lack of direction, and apathy – I don’t need to enjoy what I do – and this is a great strength. I recently finished law school, and my father came to me and asked me: “So, what area of the law are you going to specialize in? What do you enjoy?” – I looked at the question within me and answered: “Honestly, I don’t enjoy anything of it” – and then I continued: “Though that isn’t a weakness, because it means I can pick whatever area of expertise that I see holds a potential” – and this describes the power of SELF-motivation. Because I don’t enjoy any particular subject, I have a total freedom when selecting what I am going to do with my life, and because I don’t need joy or passion to move myself into a particular direction – I simply require the facts of the equation. That is enough – then I move.

Compare this way of living to someone that follows their heart that have a passion or desire which drives them to achieve and create in their life. Let us take for example, someone who aspires to become a fulltime musician. For those that do not know, this profession is extremely competitive and there is very little money to be earned. Few, very few are able to sustain themselves as musicians. Though, because this individual desires to be a musician, he will disregard the facts and still go for his dream, because he has a feeling of being motivated, a feeling of being driven, a feeling of being excited, that he use to move forward towards his goal. Though, this drive and motivation will cease, and disappear, because after a while the hope that fuels this dream will run out, as our aspiring musician face the reality of the situation. Only at that point will the person reconsider their plans, and potentially move into a different direction, and probably without any particular ambitions within his new direction – why? That is because he does not feel or experience drive or passion towards this new area of his life.

What I have just described is a problem in many people’s lives – we tend to disregard the facts and follow what we feel – though we forget one fact: In this world, nobody cares about how we feel, because reality is based on facts, and if those facts speaks against us – there is nothing we can do. Thus, when we follow our feelings, follow our experiences, and unless we are lucky, we will eventually run into reality – and that is going to hurt. This is why people that lack the experience of drive and motivation have a significant advantage – because to them it simply doesn’t matter what direction they take – because they feel nothing about it.

I am not saying that people that do experience a drive, and motivation, as feelings, are any less able to recreate their relationship towards the skill of momentum, though they are not in an optimum position. I know, because I was one of those that completely lacked motivation, and I have been able to establish a consistent, rock solid, forward motion, based on physical movement, facts, common sense reasoning, and discipline. I haven’t gotten to where I am today based on any experience – the only reason that I have been able to finish law school is because I sat down, read the books, and took the examinations – a physical directive movement.

In this series I am going to show you how I created movement from nothing, how I made decisions and followed through on them without any underlying experience of passion – I am going to lay down my process in detail, so that you can do the same as I did. The fact is that everyone can learn to create and drive their lives, and that nobody has to remain lazy, or apathetic – though it will not come by itself, every process of creation comes with its trials and errors. Hopefully you will be able to avoid many of my own mistakes, and create your own disciplined movement faster and more efficiently with the help of this blog.

In the next blog I will start covering how I came to create my pattern of laziness and apathy – I will see you there.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards