Tag Archives: apathy

Day 427: Not Settling For What Works

I had a moment a couple of days ago, as I was discussing alternative methods of child rearing together with a friend of mine. At one point my friend went into resistance, and made a case as to why one of the theories I brought forth could not work, and then shared that his life worked at the moment, and hence he had no need to bring any new ways and methods of doing things into his life.

After the discussion there were a couple of points that I brought up within me and looked, which were triggered by the subject and the principles that my friend and I discussed, the first point I looked at was how easy we accept what is here currently, as EVERYTHING that there is, and as being unalterable – forever set in stone. One example is our current money system, and the ruling ideology – capitalism. Many times when I have discussed changing this system with others, the answer that frequents has been that, ‘there is nothing to do about it, its always been like that, and it will always be like that’. It is fascinating, because looking at it with logic, it IS possible to change the current money system – it is only a behavior pattern that us humans have decided upon – it is not a law of physics – and the latter I would agree – is not able to be changed.

Hence, it is not reality that is a problem, we, ourselves, are the issue. It is the same with new theories of how to rear children. It is possible to do new things, and it is likely that these new methods will be much better than what we have had in the past. However, if we do not dare to go beyond what we have always known, and if we do not push ourselves to STRIVE for what is BEST – we will not reap the benefits. Thus, one skill that I see it is essential for me to develop is the ability to see beyond what is here currently, and to challenge myself to always go for what is the BEST – and to not settle for what works.

Settling for what works, this is a trap so many of us fall into. We settle for a job we do not like, because it provides us money, and it works. We settle for a partner that is not best for us, because it works. We settle for less than what we are able to achieve, because it works. And why do we accept and allow this? For me, it is about apathy and laziness, and then of course, fear of loss. Striving/moving towards what is BEST takes effort – it takes PUSHING and WILLING – and thus it is not something that comes through by itself. And, obviously, when striving for the BEST to manifest, what is here currently, and what works, must go. And if we fear losing what we already have, then it will be problematic to wholly GO for it.

Thus, these were a couple of realizations that I had as I looked upon the discussion I had with my friend. The tendency to accept what is here as the truth, because… it is here – and the tendency to accept what works, because… I fear really going for it, that which I see and know is BEST.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for what works, to settle for what I have done in the past, and that gives reasonable results, instead of going for it, and not settling for anything less than what is BEST, than what is a honest reflection of my true and full potential

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for anything less than my full potential, and then do the same with this world, to settle for less than what this world, and humanity, has the capability to become

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be lazy and apathetic, and not push, will myself, move towards what is BEST – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that achieving what is best is a matter of moving through my resistances, moving through my laziness, moving through my apathy, and wholeheartedly going for it, and not settling for anything less than that which is BEST

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not question my current reality, because it is my current reality, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to leave the point of directing, and impacting reality, up to others, that I feel and believe are more competent, and more able to direct things, and then as well, because my life works, it is okay – instead of pushing and willing myself to make my life the BEST it can be – and influencing, impacting, pushing, to make the lives of others the BEST that they can be

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for anything less than what is the BEST

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be willing to move past my resistances and look at new ways of doing things, new information, new perspectives, to be willing to challenge and let go of my idea and picture of reality, and move myself within myself, to embrace the new, to be open to the new, so that I can align and change my life, myself, according to what is BEST – and hence I commit myself to try all things – to consider all things – to look at all things – and to keep what is best

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself going into a reaction of resistance, fear, laziness or apathy, when I stand before something new, whatever it might be, or when I see that what is in my reality only works, and that there must be a better way of doing things, I stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand, that through willing, pushing and moving myself to constantly empower myself, empower others, to expand, to LIVE, to stimulate myself and others, to really make life AWESOME, that is how I get to what is BEST – through being open to new information, through being open to let go of the old and embrace the new – that is how I get to what is BEST – and what is BEST that is what I want in my life – not only what works – and thus I commit myself to will myself to strive, move, and push towards what is BEST – and will myself through any resistance or fear – to consider new information – new perspectives – to be open to it all – and willing to move and create myself – and change my reality and myself – from what works – to what is BEST


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Day 392: When Everything Is Fine

I have found, interestingly enough, that ‘when everything is fine’ it is a lot easier to forget about what is important in life, what we want to achieve, what we decided to set out do and what we want to build and create with ourselves. To become ‘satisfied’ can thus in many ways have a compromising effect on ones momentum/direction, because when we are satisfied it is less likely that we actively take ACTION and push ourselves to excel. For example, let us say that you striven for a long time to get a full time employment. Then, one day you get it – and you experience a deep satisfaction with yourself and your life. And obviously it is cool to enjoy and take pride in such successes, however, problems arise if you now chose to remain in that state of satisfaction – instead of pushing yourself even further with regards to your professional life. Thus – the thing to look out for with satisfaction is to make sure that we do not satiate ourselves – become self-satisfied.

I remember when the word ‘satisfied’ was discussed by Bernard Poolman on the Desteni Farm. He related the word SATIS-F–ACTION to ACTION and said that you will not be satisfied unless you have DONE something – taken ACTION in some way. I agree with and find this definition of satisfaction supportive – because in looking at satisfaction as something that will only come as a result of directive action – it clarifies the differences between satisfaction and for example laziness/apathy/listlessness.

Real satisfaction is thus only something that can come from decisive movement and action – when we move ourselves forward in life – the SATIATION/FULFILLMENT is something that we create through ACTION/MOVEMENT – and that ACTION is a point of moving through our resistances and expanding into the unknown.

This definition is also supportive when investigating why it is that we might feel unsatisfied/disappointed/empty/unfulfilled – what we can ask ourselves if this is the case is: ‘Have I done enough? Am I living my life FULLY in terms of actually creating and living/moving myself FULLY’ – because satisfaction without FULL living would be a lie.

 

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a state of satisfaction without taking action – where satisfaction becomes a point of laziness and apathy – where I rest because I feel comfortable with my life and my world – though where I am not pushing and challenging myself to walk through my mind – through my boundaries – through my comfort zones – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not actively and daily push myself to take action in relation to my process and my mind – push myself through – and create myself and my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take action and within this understand that it is through taking action that I will satiate myself and create fulfillment – and hence – ACTION as pushing through my resistances – will bring fulfillment and completion

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that living SATISFACTION means that I take daily action in order to fulfill my potential – my BEST – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to daily – will and move myself to fulfill and create my BEST – to utilize the tools of self-forgiveness, writing and self-commitment statements in order to bring through my best and utmost potential

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that satisfaction will not come through by itself – and that if I experience satisfaction without there being any action behind my experience and stance – then it is not satisfaction – then it is in-fact a form of complacency and apathy – where I believe myself to be satisfied – while I have not in-fact in anyway pushed and willed myself to move myself beyond my limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that in order to create myself and my life I have to push through my comfort zones, I have to push through my walls of fear, I have to push through my walls of complacency, I have to walk the extra mile and will myself to fulfill and create myself – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the fruit of this labor will be satisfaction – that when I make the necessary work and push through – I will be satisfied with myself

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself going into a state of complacency, apathy and listlessness, of fake satisfaction, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that this fake satisfaction is – FAKE – because I have not moved myself, pushed myself, willed myself to create and move forward – and hence – I cannot trust my experience of satisfaction – it is not real in-fact – it is a mirage – because in order to be satisfied with myself I have to will myself to move beyond my comfort zones – my state of feeling fine/okay – and go beyond what I thought was possible for me – that is where I will find real satisfaction


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Day 288: Who is doing more? Who is doing less?

During my week off I did some physical work on the farm where I live, and I did that together with my brother. It was a lot of fun, and I enjoyed the process of using my body to move myself in the physical. In working like this with another I had one experience that was recurring, and it was the experience of a form of discomfort, fear, anxiety coming up within me. This experience originated from thinking about whether I was doing more work than my brother, whether my brother was going to stop working, whether he was slacking, or whether I was slacking. There was a supervisor existent within me that compared, measured and analyzed the various efforts of the involved persons, trying to answer the question whether the work was divided equitably or not.

So, from where does this pattern originate? What I see being the core point is the idea of fairness, and the fear of things being unfair. With siblings fairness is a big deal, and when things are not fair, the same for all siblings, then what tends to happen is that fighting ensues. The problem with fairness as a concept is that it does not take into account the variables of life, and the fact that persons have different needs, wants, preferences, personalities, lifestyles etc. For things to be fair, it must be the exact same for everyone. All must do the same type of labor, put in the same hours, get the same recognition, have the same responsibilities, and so on. However, because life is not the same for everyone and because everyone is not the same, the concept of fairness is bound to clash with reality.

The fear of things not being fair includes a fear of me being fooled/deceived into doing more than others. As with the idea of fairness, this fear is bound to create problems and limitations when coming into contact with reality. For example, in holding unto the fear of doing more than others, what tends to happen is that I do not do what I am able to do, and I do not put into the hours, effort and precision I could have, because, what if I then do more than others? However the fact is that, in order to really stand and be effective in this world, I require being willing to do more than others, and to put in that extra effort even though nobody else is doing it. That is why it is called being an example, because such a point of integrity and drive has not yet been established as the norm.

Life is not fair, which is completely natural, and that is because fairness is a abstract mental concept created within and as energy, and experience, and not through actual consideration of what is here in this world – not through actually considering how this world functions – and not in consideration of what is best for all. That point of consideration, what is best for all, must be the primary point of movement and consideration, and what is best for all does at all go with the concept of fairness.

Hence, a redefinition of the word fairness, where this point is taken into account would be as follows:

Dividing responsibilities, tasks, or resources, in a way that is practical and that makes sense for everyone involved

With this redefinition of fairness, it is not anymore about who is doing more, or who is doing less; it is about, what is practical, and what makes sense. And in living this redefinition, the fear of doing more than another cannot be allowed to exist, because that will again initiate an ineffective way of looking at and handling reality, where it becomes about checks and balances, instead of looking at what is practical and makes sense for everyone involved.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear doing more than another, and fear that I will be used, and abused, to have to do work that I feel is rather someone else’s responsibility, and that it would be more fair if someone else do it instead

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become obsessed with and as the concept of fairness, with meaning that everyone should do the same, and to the same extent – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how I cannot accept and allow myself to build my self-movement on wanting things to be fair, as that will only lead to me doing the minimum amount, and then expecting others to do the rest, instead of actively living in such a way that benefits others and that creates outflows that are best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want others to do the same as me, and expect me to do the same as others, instead of accepting and allowing myself to be more flexible, and in this see, realize and understand that life does not follow the concept of fairness, life is not the same for everyone, and hence, attempting and trying to enforce a concept/ideal of fairness unto reality will inevitably cause conflict, and consequences

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to avoid labor and responsibilities, and do the least amount possible, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be used if I take on responsibilities and actively move myself to do what I see is practical and best for everyone involved

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself, to when I am asked to do something, to immediately reference my idea/definition of fairness, to see whether I think that it is fair or not, whether I feel that it is equitable or not, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how this is not an effective way of approaching reality, and that it is not an effective way of creating/forming/building a society/life that is best for all – because in doing that I require to see beyond what is fair and equitable and instead look at what is practical/best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that in keeping checks and balances, in viewing my life from within and as giving points to every action, or inaction, I am limiting myself, and clouding my view of reality and what is REALLY here – because instead – all of what I see is checks and balances – thoughts and inner conversations of whether I have done more or someone else have done more than me – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take a breath – bring myself back here – and push myself to be aware of what is really here – what makes sense and what is practical instead of my inner checks and balances

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want things to feel fair and in this not consider what is practical and what makes sense

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want things to feel fair and as if everyone is doing the same job and nobody is forced to do more – instead of looking at what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not genuinely care for others, meaning, to in-fact care that others have the best life possible, and are truly able to enjoy themselves, to pursue and live a lifestyle that supports them to reach their utmost potential

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only care about myself and my sense of fairness – instead of caring about this physical reality and what is here in the flesh

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only care about whether I feel that I am doing as much as others are – and not care about what is practical and what is best for all involved participants

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only care about my feelings and emotions and not about what is going on here in reality – and thus I see, realize and understand that for a decision to be what is best for all – it must be based on what is physical – what is reality – what is HERE and that cannot be argued or debated

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see that I am looking at my reality from a vantage point of checks and balances, weighing the contribution of everyone, who does more, who does less, etc. I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that in doing that, I am not giving birth to a living that is the most supportive and practical for all involved persons, and to do that, I require be HERE in the physical and look at what is practical and makes sense – and thus I commit myself to let go of my balances, and instead place my attention on what is physically going around in my world and move from that starting point

When and as I see that I am placing my focus on a feeling of fairness or a emotion of unfairness, when it comes to responsibilities, or receiving resources, or similar, then I stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that what is best cannot be confined or defined within such limited experiences as fairness and unfairness – and that to see and create what is best – I must let go of self-interest and see reality without bias – see clearly all the various participants and the physical momentum – and thus I commit myself to develop and learn to see and assess my physical from a unbiased vantage point – seeing everything for what it is – and making a decision from that point – hence pushing myself to let go of self-interest and instead do what is best for all

Day 276: Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

One point that is missed by many of us, that wish to change a pattern of laziness, or demotivation, into movement, and self-creation, is that we forget to look at the rewards that will come due to such a change that we make. And because of this, the focal point of our decision to change ourselves becomes ‘the problem’ and ‘the ton of shit we must walk through to change’. Thus, when we decide to change, it is important that we clarify for ourselves what the rewards of that change will be; what are we going to get out of changing? What will we be able to create, how will our lives change, and how will the experience of ourselves change?

Why is that then important? Because if you do not establish what you will get out of changing, you will not have that drive, and motivation to keep at it, to keep moving forward, to push through even though it at times might feel hard, and overwhelming. The reward is your carrot; it is the fuel that you inject into yourself that will keep you afloat when you feel like sinking back into a comfortable state of laziness, and apathy. It is in that moment your reward will come up within you, and within that you will be able to see the value you will be creating for yourself if you walk the talk, push through, and realize your decision for yourself.

Hence, before you start your process of self-change, and walking through your established behaviors of laziness and apathy, take a moment with yourself, sit down, and look at what will change in your world when you bring the decision you are about to make into reality. For example, you will now be able to do all those things that you before tended to procrastinate, immediately, and within that you will get more time with yourself, where you will be able to sit back, relax, and with a clear conscience, dedicate yourself to your hobbies. Then, your relationships will improve, because people will now notice your change, and see that you are more dependable, reliable, and trustworthy, and this might also impact on your career and job opportunities.

When you change yourself, you will also be able to stand as an example for others, and show them how it’s possible to redesign, and reinvent yourself, and you can share your story of how you went from a coach potato into actually doing something with your life, to the benefit of yourself and others as well. Because, we need more of these people in this world, we need more people that show others that change is possible, and that we do not have the stick to the limiting behaviors, and routines that we accepted and allowed ourselves to develop as we grew up and came of age. And, we need more people that actually care about themselves enough that they decide to do something with their lives, and push through the difficulties and hardships that might arise as one make a decision to bring an idea into reality.

Thus, remember, when you make the decision to change, you are not only doing it for yourself. You will influence and have an impact on many, and many of those that you inspire, you will probably not be aware of, but within them you are going to create that small burst of excitement, and awaken that slumbering voice, saying: “What if I could change? What if I could become as effective as he/she?” – and being able to awaken that latent urge to expand is an awesome gift that you are able to give.

With this blog I am concluding my series on Creating Movement. I hope you have enjoyed this series of blogs and found some inspiration to start your own process of self-change. I know that it is possible, I have myself been a lazy person, and now I am not – and that was a change that I managed to bring through by following the steps that I have outlined in these series blogs. Becoming a motivated and driven human being is thus not something you must be born with, it can be created, and that is the beauty of life – we can create and bring into reality that which we see is supportive, and remove that which we see is destructive. Laziness and apathy are destructive forces, both on a personal, and existential level, because when there is no drive, and motivation to push forward – how can we create the best possible life for ourselves and each-other? It is simply not possible. As such, get yourself in gear and develop that motivation and drive – we are all able to do this for ourselves.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 249: Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes

girlinwoods-1080x675Many times when we meet people, we tend to be quick to judge. After a glance, a short conversation, or meeting, we believe that we know who someone is, and we treat him or her accordingly. The fascinating thing however, is that we rarely take time to really understand another person. Obviously, the guy that went out and robbed some old lady did not become a robber overnight – all of our decisions, and the characters we live on a daily basis are created through a process of time and space. We face certain points, difficulties, challenges, or realize aspects about life, and we make changes in our way of living. This is the process of creation all human beings go through, and that is most noticeable during the teenage years.

Now, why do I bring up this point? Because it is important to understand that I was not born lazy, I wasn’t born apathetic, this was pattern I came to create through a process of time and space. I faced certain points in my life; from there I evaluated the information and made decisions that were not effectively aligned to my physical reality. Thus to say that I was just one of those ‘spoiled’ kids that didn’t want to do anything with his life is a generalization, and a simplification, and doesn’t give justice to what actually happened, and is nowhere near laying all the facts on the table. In this blog, thus, I am going to deeper into the fundamental bricks that led me to create a character of laziness and apathy, and primarily focus on the external causes the lead to laziness and apathy, which most of the times origin in the parent-child relationship. Hence, this blog will be of assistance and support for parents and others that can’t understand why their child, or someone in their life, is lazy, and indifferent.

Lack of responsibility

A friend of mine once told me that: “When you create something, you must give it responsibility”. This is very true, because without responsibility, you cannot grow or expand as a human being – without responsibility none of your actions have consequence, and regardless of what you do, it doesn’t feel as if it is for real. This is a mistake that a tremendous amount of parents do – they are afraid of giving their children responsibility, and this in turn creates consequences, which happened to me when I was a child.

Now, giving responsibility does not imply trying to control your child to do what you want – it doesn’t imply that you must threaten your child to follow through on their commitments. Giving responsibility implies a process of education, where the child or teenager learns to see and understand the nature of consequence and how this is something we create through our actions and inactions. Most parents are not sufficiently trained to educate their children in how consequences are created, and due to this they will attempt to develop conscience and responsibility in their child utilizing manipulation, fear and rewards. Unfortunately, these methods does not direct the origin of the issue, which is that the child haven’t formed an ability to understand the role they play in their environment, and how their life affect the lives of others.

Thus, what I have found in my research into laziness, and apathy, is that one of the primary causes of this behavioral dysfunction, is lack of responsibility, or rather, a lack of understanding responsibility. In my case this was a pattern that developed due to how my parents saw me, and in turn treated me – and basically they never gave me any responsibility of my own. No matter what I did, in the end, I always did it for someone other than myself – and my motivation to do it was so that I would not get punished, or so I would get a reward – hence not because I actually understood what I was doing.

It is clear that I can’t blame my parents for this, because my parents were not shown this area of child education by their parents. In-fact most people do not grow up until they get children of their own. Only then they realize their responsibility towards their environment, and are basically forced to snap out of any tendency to slack or be lazy. Though this can all be avoided through making sure that we give responsibility to our children – which basically entails seeing and making them equal to ourselves – were we give them charge of a certain point and then assist and support them to walk through the point and in that grow, and realize their interconnectedness with other parts of life.

Affluence

If you take a look at the first world countries, and the teenagers in these countries, and compare them to teenagers living in developing countries, you will many times notice a fascinating difference. The youngsters growing up in a developing country are oftentimes more mature, self-independent, self-reliant, and strong – have a goal set in mind and are daily motivating themselves to create their goal. This is maturity that very few teenagers, and youngsters acquire in the more affluent first world countries – and the cause of this is: Our relationship to money.

Taking myself as an example, I grew up in a family where all I had to do was point at something, and eventually I would get it. There was no effort, no movement, no willpower required for me to get what I wanted, what I wanted just came to me. Obviously my parents had good intentions, though the consequence was that I formed a misaligned relationship to self-creation and the point of building a life for myself in this world. Deep within me I formed an idea that things would just come to me, that my major life decisions would just be made for me, that my life would just easily flow forward, and become what I wanted it to become, without any effort, willpower or drive on my side. Undeniably, this is not how things work in actuality.

Though, I am not saying that children must be deprived of money, and that they have to work for their money to understand what money is and what role it plays in relation to self-creation. What I am saying is that most parents neglect the important point of early on showing their child the effort that is required to create your own path in life in relation to career, education, and other survival points – and why it is important to create a life for yourself. Due to this, children grow up oblivious of the tough reality that awaits them when their time in school is over, and because they are so used to get everything they want to, they do not have the skill of self-disciplined movement that is required to create something extraordinary.

Hence, when the parent steps in too much, and doesn’t assist and support the child to develop their own understanding and relationship to creation, money, career, and movement in the system – a consequence that forms is laziness, apathy and indifference in the child. This is what happened to me, and many of my friends – we simply did not have clear understanding of what is required to create for ourselves a supportive and enjoyable lifestyle in this world.

Lack of freedom

Another important aspect of how laziness and apathy is created, which also, most often, stems from the parent-child relationship, is lack of freedom. This point couples closely with lack of responsibility, though it is slightly different. The freedom I look at here is the freedom to make decisions, the freedom to make the wrong decisions, the freedom to choose your life, and what to create with it. Obviously, here, I am not saying that its supportive to just stand by and watch while someone is clearly abusing or creating severe consequences for themselves – it is instead important to step in and assist and support through sharing insights, and realizations than trying to force a change in the child.

In my own life, I didn’t have much freedom of my own – the simple reason being that my parents wanted to control most dimensions of my life. In particular they wished to control my plans for the future, my way of interacting with the world, my morals, my values, and my thinking processes. The consequence of this was that I in my teenage years went through the usual state of rebellion, where I basically started to create many consequences for myself, just to show my parents that I indeed had my freedom – that I was in control. And one of the points that I used to portray this apparent freedom of mine, was to show to others how I didn’t care about anything – how I was totally free from the control of others – apathy and laziness was thus a way for me to reject the adult world and achieve my freedom of choice.

The problem here is obviously that trying to live freedom in this way is very consequential, and it’s not even real freedom – what I lived out was more an attempt to SHOW others that I was free. Though was I then free to begin with? When my starting point was to prove to others that I was free? So, what is missing in the parent-child relationship, and what must be created for the child to not feel that they have to rebel in order to feel free, is that the child must be given the freedom to create their own lives from an early age. This freedom must entail, the freedom of making mistakes, the freedom of being different, and the freedom of not being/thinking/living like the parents.

Summary

In this blog I have investigated and shared some of the external causes of laziness and apathy in people. These causes are primarily found in the parent-child relationship and basically have the same origin point: The child is not assisted and supported to develop and nurture their own individual expression. Laziness is on a deep level a protest, a way of saying that, it doesn’t matter what I do, because someone is going to step in and make me do differently anyway. This is obviously a misconception, because as adults WE DO have the power to create our lives – but our childhood reminiscences have more power than what we are aware of – and there are many that can remain for an entire lifetime in a character of laziness and apathy. It doesn’t have to be this way, and in this series of blogs I am eventually going to walk through the process of correction, that will assist and support anyone stuck in a laziness-character, to step out of laziness and into self-movement.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 247: What’s The Point?

In looking at the state of the world today, with so much suffering happening on many levels, more or less everywhere on earth – it’s easy to go into that experience of ‘what is really the point?’ – and also in that start to wonder, with this sentimental energy: ‘What can I do about all of this? It’s just too much! I should rather just make the most of my personal life and leave the rest be!’ – and from there it’s easy to fall into the comfort of one’s personal life, with the personal goals, the personal satisfactions, the personal experiences, where the state of the world is conveniently forgotten.

What most of us human beings tend to do, is that we live out our personal lives, we live in a very small and secluded bubble, we have limited influence and effect – we do the things we enjoy to do and we resist, and stay away from the things we dislike. For those of us lucky enough to live in the western hemisphere, we’re able to now and then, go on a vacation, have a couple of cars, a job, a family, and do something constructive with ourselves, and fascinatingly enough that is something very few have – a minority of this world. What is even more fascinating is that, instead of using these fortunate life circumstances to stand up, and dedicate our time towards producing a solution that is best for all, we squander it, and basically, our entire life end up being a self-entertainment parade – where everything we ever did or didn’t do is all for ourselves, or those closest to us. The rest of the world we don’t accept and allow into our lives – it’s them vs. me.

We see this behavior as normal, and when someone challenges this mentality, what you get back, the reasoning so to speak, is that apparently, there is no point to attempt and try to do anything with your life – it won’t lead to anything anyway – so it’s better to just enjoy the life you have and then recognize your luck to be born in a country where you’re able to at least satisfy and realize some of your dreams. Though, is this way of reasoning valid? Is it valid for us to simply live out our existence in a state of blissful ignorance while the majority of the world exists in a state of peril? How would you feel if you were the one living in dire conditions, and there on the other side of the world, millions of people with affluent lifestyles, with the time and resources to actually do something, just sat back, walked through their daily chores, tried to realize their personal goals, and dreams, and basically did nothing what-so-ever to impact this world in a positive and lasting way? Would you stand for that?

I am not saying that we have to give up our comfortable lives, sell our homes, quit our jobs, and embrace poverty – what I am saying is that our comfortable lifestyle is something that we can give to everyone. I am saying that we, that do have the resources, are responsible to create and build something more out of ourselves and our lives – we’re obligated to create something that have an impact, not only for those closest to us, but for everyone. We’re obligated to use our time to make sure that no one gets to lead an existence of starvation, and that no one gets to experience to trauma and stress of war, or migration.

Thus, if you see what I see, don’t accept and allow yourself to wait anymore – make sure that your life is not lived in vain, but that you do contribute to a lasting and sustainable solution, on a personal, interpersonal and existential level. This world can change – but in order for that change to come through – we must make the decision to act, to live, and to start working together and move towards the future, which we want to have for each other, ourselves and the children to come.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become possessed with my own life, with my own dreams, with my own goals, and hopes, and in that only think about myself, and what I can do with my life, how I can further my interests, and how I can make something for myself that will be good for me – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not include the rest of the world into myself, and to within this, push and will myself to make decisions that are best for all – and that have a impact, a influence, an actual value for the many and not just for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become possessed with my own future, and in this not see, realize and understand that my future can’t be the best, unless everyone’s future is the best, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I must include it into my awareness, and into my life, to contribute to the life of all, to give back, and to give as I’d like to receive, and to make sure, that in my life, I push for solutions that will have an impact on a global level, and that will benefit all people – because in that way I will produce ripple effects that are going to benefit not only me, but also future generations, nature, animals, and people living in all areas of the world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that what is missing in me, is the ability to be aware of the whole, and to realize that my life doesn’t extend only to my home, to my work, to the money that I earn, but that my life extends to the entirety of this existence, and thus I see, realize and understand that I have a responsibility to make something with my life that is best for all, that does produce a benefit for people, and that is something that people can take with themselves, and apply in their daily lives, to enhance themselves, and their lives, to as such in effect enhance the state of this world, and the earth that we all live upon

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel, and experience as if it’s meaningless to do anything, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it’s not in-fact meaningless, it just feels meaningless, but the fact is that when I act, when I am clear on what I am doing, and I am pushing forward, I am in-fact having a effect, I am in-fact having a consequence and I am moving a point forward, and even though I might not feel like it’s going forward – it is in-fact – because I am moving forward – thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become clouded by emotions instead of accepting and allowing myself to stick with physical movement, physical action, and physical direction on a day to day basis – where I move myself forward to produce a world that is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that if no one does anything at all, there will never be a solution to the problems that have arisen in this world – and the fact is that – unless someone take the first step and start moving themselves in the direction of change – that first step will never come – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stand within and as that commitment and decision within myself to be the one that takes the first step forward – and that starts creating a life and a future that is worthwhile – that is effective – and that will be something of value which we’re able to give to our children

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the feelings of something being pointless and meaningless can’t be trusted, that even though something might be incremental in it’s change, and that only a small, and very insignificant part of the change is coming through, so little that it can’t be seen, it’s still a change, and it still implies that things are moving forward – and thus I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to stick to, and hold unto the insight, and realization, that through consistent action, through consistent movement – that I will be able to create a difference for myself as well as others – and that it’s this very point I see, and understand that I must stand by – and use as a motivation to day by day drive myself forward and build a purpose, and life for myself – that will be of benefit to all – and not but myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that change will not happen in a moment, and that it took billions of years to create the current situation on earth, and that it will take a long time to correct the current situation that is here – and even though it won’t happen – even though all attempts to correct and direct the situation on earth will fail – it’s still not a reason and excuse to stop and not do anything at all – and to sink back into a lifestyle of only living for personal enjoyment and satisfaction – and thus I commit myself to not go into emotion – but to remain steadfast and move consistently forward – towards what I see is the utmost potential for humanity and this world – which is an existence lived in harmony where all parts of life can be expressed fully equal and one

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see that I am going into a state of hopelessness, and that there is no point to what I am doing, and the movement I’ve committed myself to, and that I am walking on a daily basis, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that it shouldn’t matter whether, or whether not there is a change, or a movement happening due to my actions, but what is important is that I stand by and with my principle, that I decide to move, and be consistent and stable, and steadfast in my movement, and that I move with the purpose that I’ve given to myself in this lifetime, to make a difference for all, and for myself, and to give as I’d like to receive – and thus I commit myself to take a breath, and ground myself in my human physical body, and stand by the resolve, to move forward, and to continue with my self-creation, and self-realization process – to continue to expose and share what is going on in this world and the solutions that exists to create a world that is best for all

When and as I see that I am going into a state of wanting to give up, and focus on my own personal life, my own personal enjoyment and satisfaction, and leave out the rest of the world so that I can do my own thing, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that this is not a solution, that doing that, living but my personal life, will neither give me peace, satisfaction, or produce any changes in this world, which will just remain in status quo – and thus I commit myself to each day, will myself to create and bring something to the table, to push this world, and this existence forward – that makes this world a better and more effective place – heaven on earth – to do that through practical daily actions that I see have a benefit and produce value

Day 247: Creating Movement – Part 1

girl-261182_640This blog post will be the start of a series of blogs where I will share how I changed myself from being without movement and direction, to being motivated, driven, and proactive. I know that there are many out there like me – that just do not feel like doing anything – and I mean – literally nothing sparks an interest within you. In today’s society many view this state of apathy as a weakness, and also as an unchangeable aspect of the individual – a so-called characteristic. I have found these apparent facts to be merely beliefs, because truth is that everyone is capable of changing – AND – another surprising thing is that those caught in apathy and listlessness, in-fact have the greatest potential for change. The reason being that these people are able to CREATE their own definition of drive and movement, and become this movement as a self-expression – and this way of motion is vastly superior to any form of energetic movement that exists in our current society today, such as passion, excitement or desire.

The simple truth is that energetic motivation is a lie – an illusion – motivation isn’t ever needed for movement to be created – and this is basically the underlying realization that have guided me in my process of transcending laziness, lack of direction, and apathy – I don’t need to enjoy what I do – and this is a great strength. I recently finished law school, and my father came to me and asked me: “So, what area of the law are you going to specialize in? What do you enjoy?” – I looked at the question within me and answered: “Honestly, I don’t enjoy anything of it” – and then I continued: “Though that isn’t a weakness, because it means I can pick whatever area of expertise that I see holds a potential” – and this describes the power of SELF-motivation. Because I don’t enjoy any particular subject, I have a total freedom when selecting what I am going to do with my life, and because I don’t need joy or passion to move myself into a particular direction – I simply require the facts of the equation. That is enough – then I move.

Compare this way of living to someone that follows their heart that have a passion or desire which drives them to achieve and create in their life. Let us take for example, someone who aspires to become a fulltime musician. For those that do not know, this profession is extremely competitive and there is very little money to be earned. Few, very few are able to sustain themselves as musicians. Though, because this individual desires to be a musician, he will disregard the facts and still go for his dream, because he has a feeling of being motivated, a feeling of being driven, a feeling of being excited, that he use to move forward towards his goal. Though, this drive and motivation will cease, and disappear, because after a while the hope that fuels this dream will run out, as our aspiring musician face the reality of the situation. Only at that point will the person reconsider their plans, and potentially move into a different direction, and probably without any particular ambitions within his new direction – why? That is because he does not feel or experience drive or passion towards this new area of his life.

What I have just described is a problem in many people’s lives – we tend to disregard the facts and follow what we feel – though we forget one fact: In this world, nobody cares about how we feel, because reality is based on facts, and if those facts speaks against us – there is nothing we can do. Thus, when we follow our feelings, follow our experiences, and unless we are lucky, we will eventually run into reality – and that is going to hurt. This is why people that lack the experience of drive and motivation have a significant advantage – because to them it simply doesn’t matter what direction they take – because they feel nothing about it.

I am not saying that people that do experience a drive, and motivation, as feelings, are any less able to recreate their relationship towards the skill of momentum, though they are not in an optimum position. I know, because I was one of those that completely lacked motivation, and I have been able to establish a consistent, rock solid, forward motion, based on physical movement, facts, common sense reasoning, and discipline. I haven’t gotten to where I am today based on any experience – the only reason that I have been able to finish law school is because I sat down, read the books, and took the examinations – a physical directive movement.

In this series I am going to show you how I created movement from nothing, how I made decisions and followed through on them without any underlying experience of passion – I am going to lay down my process in detail, so that you can do the same as I did. The fact is that everyone can learn to create and drive their lives, and that nobody has to remain lazy, or apathetic – though it will not come by itself, every process of creation comes with its trials and errors. Hopefully you will be able to avoid many of my own mistakes, and create your own disciplined movement faster and more efficiently with the help of this blog.

In the next blog I will start covering how I came to create my pattern of laziness and apathy – I will see you there.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards