Tag Archives: challenge

Day 417: Challenging Status Quo

There is this tendency within me, and seemingly humans in general, to accept what is currently here as the unchangeable truth. Let us take money for example and how it functions currently. Each time I consider and look at money, I do that from the premise of how it is working currently; thus in my mind – I am limited in how I am looking at an relating both to myself and this world – because – I accept what is here without question and more importantly – without seeing, realizing and understanding that I have the power to change it.

I would say, that this tendency of mine, to accept what is in my external reality, is a mirror image of how I relate to patterns on a internal level. Hence, what I want to develop within myself is the skill to actively question, reconsider and assess both myself and my external reality. Is what is here currently the BEST it can be? Am I currently the BEST that I can be? And if that is not the case, then what can I do to bring myself to that state of being the BEST that I can be? What patterns within myself have I recognized, however accepted and allow to remain as is, because, I believe that they cannot be changed?

It might be that we feel safe with the status quo. When everything is as it used to be, then at least, we have a form of safety in that. However, why not instead strive to make ourselves, and our lives the best that they can be? What is it that stands in our way but ourselves?

I will push myself to actively challenge and question both my inner and outer reality, and simultaneously look at solutions that I can apply to bring through what is BEST.


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Day 354: Nostalgia, Why Does It Exist?

Today, I had a moment where Nostalgia arose within me. With a sense of loss I remembered passed moments in which I had lavishly enjoyed hours of making music, which stood in stark contrast with my current lifestyle, where most of my time is spent working. Instead of remaining in that experience, I stopped myself, and I gave myself a moment to question the experience.

What is Nostalgia? Why does Nostalgia comes up within me? What is the consequence of participating in Nostalgia?

One thing that I could see clearly as I asked myself these questions was that it is not like my current life is in anyway bad, or that I lack opportunities to for example, make music. In-fact, I have ample of opportunities to pursue hobbies, and thus I could see that it was not the fault of my work that I was not making music anymore. In-fact, the thing that was standing in my way of me making more music was myself – nobody and nothing else. Surely, the conditions of my life had changed since back then, though it is still a possibility for me to pursue music creation. And this then opened up another dimension of the experience of Nostalgia, with regards to the question, what is Nostalgia?

Nostalgia, it is the negative emotion, the drug of choice, that we give to ourselves to feel inferior and less than our past. It is what we use to not have to create, live, pursue, and actively expand in our current reality HERE – because when we are in an experience of Nostalgia – the past is seemingly always better and always out of reach. However, that is not true, fact is that we are still alive, and still fully capable of creating our life and future. The function of Nostalgia is thus to justify why we should not give effort and willpower into creating ourselves and our lives – why we should wait – why it is okay to be discontent with what we have here yet still remain in a experience of longing towards what we lived and experienced in the past.

The solution to Nostalgia is thus to look at where in our lives where are not living our utmost potential, where it is that we are holding back, allowing ourselves to be limited and confined, and then in that area, push ourselves to break through and live what we see is best for ourselves. Thus, it is not about recreating the past, it is about creating the future – and making sure that we always expand, move and challenge ourselves to be the best that we can become.


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Day 342: Creating Expansion, Movement and Challenges

A year ago I finished my education and some months thereafter I began my first job. I have now worked at this job for about a year, and up until some months ago, I found most of the activities within my job refreshing and enjoyable. Most of the things were new to me, and hence I was challenged daily, which I loved. I had to really push, and exert myself to learn and expand. Then without much warning, I was through the difficult times. I had learned the basics of the job, and I was moving myself quite effortlessly within my responsibilities.

What then opened up was an experience of boredom. I could see that I was plateauing in my growth process, however, I did not see that as my responsibility. I thought that the fault was in my job, and that I had now learned the basics of my position, and that there was thus nothing in it for me any longer. What started to come through more and more was emotions; blame, depression, tiredness, apathy and listlessness. I did not see the enjoyment in my work anymore, because the challenge was gone.

Looking back at my life, I have had a tendency of taking on a new craft or skill, pushing myself diligently to learn and master it, and then, when I started to feel as if I was plateauing, I would give up and move unto something different. The consequence of this behavior was that I did not learn something in depth – I was a jack of all trades, yet master of none. This is similar to what I have been going through recently, where my job is no longer a novelty and does not supply me with challenges, difficulties, and points to overcome. It has become a job, something I know, and have to do, and nothing more.

Now, when I look at this point, one thing that stands out is how I have approached tasks, projects, skills, and also work, within a form of laziness. Not laziness from the perspective that I  compromised my work, though laziness in the sense that I expected and wanted my work or the project to give me a challenge. Inside my mind, I viewed the point I was walking into as a ‘fun house’ that was supposed to refresh and charge me up – however when the novelty disappeared – that did not happen anymore. Hence, I was lazy from the perspective that I expected to be moved, to be inspired, to be stimulated, to be pushed, and I did not approach to point from the starting point of ME standing the point of taking responsibility for myself, that I would challenge myself, that I would push myself, that I would find ways and seek new venues and expressions, so that I could move and further myself within the particular skill/ability/project/work.

The problem thus has never been, with reference to this instance, my work – no – it has always been my relationship to work, how I decided to approach and look at work. Challenge, novelty, movement, expansion, and pushing myself, I should never have expected that my work would give that to me. Obviously, when something is new, it will for a moment be challenging, however, when that honeymoon phase is past, I must take responsibility to push myself, and expand myself within my profession. At that point I cannot rely upon my work doing anything for me. Instead, I must take matter into my own hands and actively look at where I am able to learn more, where I am able to expand, where I can push and enhance myself, and where I am able to further my expression.

It is fascinating thus to see, that so far, the technique that I have used to challenge myself, has been to look up and try to place myself in challenging environments, through changing jobs, changing education, or committing myself to a new hobby. Even though this has supported me and spiced things up, it has also been a limitation, as I have not taken the responsibility, taken matter into my own hands, and really, diligently pushed myself to expand where I was at.

And another thing to take into consideration is that I can only become really good at something, if I do it several times. If I only skim the surface, how can I then ever become an expert in my field? It is not possible. In-fact, it is not the routine and repetition in itself that has been bothering me, the big problem is that I react to routine and repetition and believe myself to be limited and contained. Though, this is not true, even though there might be routine and repetition in my life, there is always room to expand, explore, push, improve and move further.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect that my job will reinvent itself, and stimulate me, and that my job is going to make my life enjoyable, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding, that I am not able to rely upon my job, that I am not able to blame my job when I feel that I am stuck in a rut, without expanding or improving – and in-fact – the real problem is that I have not taken self-direction in my relationship with work

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want and desire to be stimulated instead of taking self-responsibility and looking at how I am able to stimulate myself within what I am doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect to be stimulated – and thus not push and drive myself to expand – to look at how I am able to empower myself – strengthen myself – push myself – and will myself to become more effective within what I am doing – and thus I commit myself to each day – look at how I can expand – to never be satisfied with where I am at – but constantly push myself to reach new heights of expression and direction – to not be satisfied with being ‘good’ at something – but push myself to become excellent within what I am doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to push myself to reach excellency – to use that as a motivation regardless of where I am at – to not accept and allow myself to be satisfied with mediocrity – to be average – to know something quite well – and quite effective – but to push myself to become an expert within what I am doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that when I plateau – this is when I must push myself – to look for ways in which I am able to expand and enhance myself – to look for ways in which I am able to acquire further skills – abilities – and strengths – to look at my life and critically examine it – to see if and whether I am able to do more – to see whether I am able to acquire and expand myself within some area of my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame work as boring when I know it effectively – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect that work should stimulate me – instead of me taking self-responsibility and making sure that I stand as the point of stimulation – that I stand as the point of self-responsibility – that I stand as the point of pushing myself forward – placing no limits on myself – and looking at how and where I am able to expand

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not develop a passion for life – in the sense of always looking at how I am able to expand and move myself forward to the next stage of development

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not develop and push myself to create a passion for expansion

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to reach and build a life where I am satisfied – not seeing, realizing and understanding, that satisfaction, oftentimes goes hand in hand with complacency – where we become lazy, and stop the process of exploration and movement that we would otherwise walk – and thus I commit myself to embrace dissatisfaction – to use it as a motivation to empower and move myself – to use it as a motivation to enhance myself – and bring myself to the next level of development

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that nothing is going to come by itself – that nothing is going to happen by itself – and that if I want challenges in my life – then I must actively pursue and create them – I must actively look at how I am able to make my life challenging – through for example – in my work – looking at how I am able to expand my understanding of work – of how I am able to take on more tasks and responsibilities at work – of looking at how I am able to really expand and become effective at my work

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself blaming my world, my reality, for being boring, not challenging, routine and repetition with no movement, I take a breath and I bring myself back here, and I stop – and I see, realize and understand, that for movement, change and expansion to happen, I must move myself, I must push myself, I cannot expect that things will simply happen by themselves, as they will not – and thus I commit myself to be on my toes – and to continuously be on the look out for how I am able to change myself – push and expand myself – and reach the next stage of development and expression

I commit myself to take self-responsibility for making my life challenging, expansive, fulfilling, and enjoyable – through not expecting to be stimulated – but rather – pushing and willing myself to improve and expand – constantly being on the look out for opportunities – and seizing the opportunities when they arise


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Day 187: Embracing Creativity

I will continue to hear open up the point of fear towards the future that I’ve worked in recent blogs – and this time I am going to look at the character that I’ve noticed myself go into in regards to the future – the “I-am-not-going-to-make-it”-character.

Now, this character is signified by a cynical and fearful way of looking at the future – challenges, difficulties, problems, and issues will be perceived in a negative sense – and what will play out within me is images and backchat where I walk through the worst case scenario and find myself standing without any direction or solution.

What I thus see is a solution ­– is to redefine challenges, difficulties, problems and issues – and see that they are not something to be feared or avoided – but that they represent opportunities for me to be creative – inventive – and where I can use my artistic, musical and expressive side to move through these difficulties and find a solution. Because for example when I make music – and I run into a artistic conundrum – I never hesitate, give up, or give in – I always push through – find a way – and look for the best possible solution to the problem – and I remain with it until I got it – and this side of myself is something that I see I am able to apply in other areas of my life as well – where I’ve not yet applied the creative force that I possess and which I am actually really good at bringing through and using to take the potentials that I see into physical creation and manifestation.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not utilize and bring forth my expression of being creative, problem-solving, and focused on finding solutions into all aspects and areas of my life – and see, realize and understand that I am in-fact good at finding ways to work with points – and to bring points to fruition – and to walk through challenges and difficulties – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I must accept and allow myself to embrace this skill that I have and make use of it in all areas of my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit my artistic, creative, and inventive expression to only be in relation to music, writing, singing, and other artistic endeavors – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that I am able to utilize and bring forth this expression and momentum in all areas of my life – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not when I face issues, difficulties, and points that I initially do not know how to direct – to immediately go into looking for solutions – looking at potentials – looking at what I am able to utilize and bring forth in order to get through the conundrum that I am facing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I face difficulties in my life in relation to career, studies, and money – to immediately give in and give up upon myself – and think that there is no way I am able handle – walk through and direct the situation that I find myself within – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that this is not in-fact true – it’s just that I’ve never applied that skill I have to find solutions – to be inventive – to be creative – in those areas of my life – and thus I commit myself to bring that artistic side of myself into use in all areas of my life – and primarily begin practicing with the areas of money, career and education – and thus push myself to look for solutions – to find ways – to not give in but to work and push until I’ve found a way through

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that life is not very unlike music and artistic expression – that just as in music – life is a flow of events – as music is a flow of tones – and successful improvisation in music is to keenly listen at the tones and then accept and allow myself to submerge myself in the music – and live – be creative and trust myself that I will find the tone – the melody – that way that works and that is aligned with the music – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not apply this realization in all of my life – and in particular in the parts of my life that concern career, money and education – and understand that in applying this skill and ability I will be able to get through any obstacle – because I won’t give up – and I will push until I’ve found a way through

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see that I am facing challenges, and difficulties in my life – in particular in relation to money, career and education – and I go into fear and giving up – I stop – I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I commit myself to then bring myself into that state of creativity and finding solutions – and thus investigate – make the research – and align myself within this point of self-trust – that I trust myself that I will walk through and find a way out – and not give in or give up until it’s done and I’ve directed the situation – and I am stable

I commit myself to not give up or give in to fear when I face challenges or difficulties – but instead push myself to trust myself and face the challenge head-on – and move myself until I got it – until I am stable and my direction ahead is clear – and I’ve found a solution to the point

Day 178: Unconscious Ideas of Life

I am continuing my process of uncovering fear and anxiety in relation to the future – and in particular fears regarding money, career, education, and housing.

Yesterday I asked my partner she could support my in laying tarot cards on this point, she did that, and the following emerged: Life and responsibility is something that I’ve placed outside of myself and that I see as being very fragile things that unless I constantly tend to them, and make sure they function and are properly in place – they will fall apart. Thus, fear is something that has come up within me in relation to my future, because I feel unable to effectively handle life, and from my perspective, it’s more like an egg that I balance on spoon, while I am at the same time running forward, dodging, and zigzagging to avoid obstacles.

The delusion I’ve created is that I will through this running, and pushing myself forward in life, at one stage, or time be able to relax, and let go – to put that egg away and breathe out. The problem though, is that there exist no such stage or future time, and that regardless of how many projects, or methods I develop, to ensure my life, my financial success, my comfort, and lifestyle, that experience of life being like wobbly egg on a spoon will persist – because the core-point has not effectively been dealt with.

Thus, in this blog I am going to look at the core-point, which is as I currently see it located in a memory from my teens. I was around seventeen years old, and had some years left in school before I was supposed to wander into the world by myself. At this time I began to question what skills, and abilities I’d attained throughout my life, and I concluded that they were few and far in-between. This thought-construct came up and develop from within and as a experience and starting point of fear, and anxiety, and primarily the worry was related to how I would be able to deal with my future – what would I be able to do with my life when I knew absolutely nothing at all? Would I slowly but surely sink into non-existence as my life came to be more and more irrelevant? That was my origin fear – the fear of not being able to do anything with myself and my life and that it would just vanish – and that my life would come to nothing.

So, in this I decided to develop skills, and abilities, and it was specifically done from this starting point of fear – and I moved myself very diligently and with great perseverance – yet: It was all based upon fear – and here I am today – wherein this fear is still prevalent within me – because of this one point – where I decided that I can’t trust myself to walk into my life and deal with it – stabilize myself within it – and make something out of myself – but that I must develop and create some form of skill that I can define myself according to – in order for me to be sure that my life will not fall apart the moment I step out of my parents protective sphere and start caring for and directing my own life and living.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to state within myself, that because I have no skills, and no abilities, I will not be able to care for, and attend to, and direct my life, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create and form the solution within me, that I must acquire, and build skills for myself so that I am able survive in this world, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to decide to develop, and create skills for myself in this world, from a starting point of fear, and self-distrust, in believing that I am not able to handle, and effectively direct my life, and living, and I am not able to stabilize myself without being certain that I have money, and I have the skills I require in order to attain the particular professions that I require to place myself in to survive

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make the decision to develop skills from a starting point of fear, and self-distrust, in thinking to myself that I am not able to trust myself, and I am not able to rely upon myself in walking, and participating in this world, and that I require, and need someone else to guide me, and help, or I need, and require some form of skill or ability that I am able to rely upon and that can help me get through my life so that I am able to survive, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience fear, and anxiety, and give into these experiences, and design my life around these experiences, in believing that they are real, and that I am not able to trust myself, and I am not able to build a life for myself, because I am somehow, simply not equipped, and stable enough, to go out and create and build myself, and stand stable and certain in my life, unless I have these skills and abilities in my backpack

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not instead trust myself that I will be able to walk out into this world and direct myself – to develop the skills necessary for me to handle my life, to if I find myself in a situation where I don’t have developed skills or abilities, that I then direct myself to do so, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself that I will be able to direct and handle, and take on, and walk the situations in my life that come up, and that I don’t need some form of additional experience, skill or ability to do that, and that I as such only need and require myself – my human physical body here – and that I direct myself HERE to deal with what emerge in my life on a moment per moment basis

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distrust myself in terms of being able to walk and handle and direct my life effectively, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, perceive and believe that my effectiveness, and ability in terms of handling, and directing my life is dependent upon a ability, a skill, or a experience, upon money, upon my future, upon my past, instead realizing that I can trust myself to direct my life – that I don’t need and require to attain and have something more – or something better – or something more extravagant than myself – and that it’s about WHO I AM within and as each and every moment of breath – it’s about who I decide to be and how I decide to live and how I decide to approach my life and the problems that emerge that I require to direct – that is what will make the difference as to whether I will live a effective life or not

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself, and see, realize and understand that what I require in order to be effective in life is not skills, or abilities, but rather that I am present, aware, and HERE, ready and able to direct and move myself – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not instead of focusing upon creating skills and abilities for myself, focus upon me remaining present, aware and stable here – not reacting, not becoming emotional, and not becoming possessed with experiences, but rather remaining factual, and objective – and developing solutions and directing problems as they emerge – and realizing that this is what I require to perfect in order for me to walk through my life effectively – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the gift of self-trust – and expand myself within this self-trust in developing the ability take my decisions upon basis of common sense as I face challenges and difficult points and situations throughout my life and living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make the decision within myself that I am not able to trust myself, and to believe that the only way I will be able to get myself through this lifetime is through acquiring certain abilities and skills, acquiring money, and a profession that is stable, so that I can be certain that I will survive, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that in making that decision, I set myself up for a lifetime of fear, wherein I’ve placed myself in separation from life, and in separation from responsibility, instead of standing as those points as myself – and living as life – living as responsibility – and thus not anymore trying to fix, or repair, or direct my life to become safe, and secure, in order for me to make it through my life – but instead trusting myself that whatever might come and emerge in my life – I will find a solution – I will direct myself – and I will place myself in a position and in a stand that will be supportive for myself and those around me

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see that I am going into a state of self-distrust, in believing that I require a particular skill, or ability, or future play-out in order to make it, and be safe, and secure, and stable, I stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here to my human physical body – and I see, realize and understand that this is only a fix, and an attempt to repair an underlying issue which is that I don’t trust myself to walk through life and direct myself effectively, and find solutions to the issues and problems that I face – and thus I commit myself to develop myself as my direction and my self-trust in standing stable and effective HERE – finding solutions and move through difficult times and challenges through establishing routes and plans – and movements that will be supportive for me as well as those around me – thus trusting myself to deal with and direct life as it emerge and develop – instead of trusting that skills and abilities will do this for me

I commit myself to develop self-trust – through pushing myself to trust myself as I walk into the future, and into the unknown – that I will direct the challenges and problems – that I will find solutions – and that I will not give up upon myself – but instead push myself until I am satisfied that I’ve established effective ways of directing my life that is best for all

Day 14: Test-anxiety – Stress as motivation (Part 4)

How are stressed people portrayed in this world? Partly their portrayed as people that get many things done – that have lot’s of responsibilities, and are within that being productive – that’s why their stressed – their running from activity, to activity trying to get as much done as possible; but is this in-fact so? I mean – do stressed people get more things done that non-stressed people?

premed+stressHere I can take a look at myself and ask myself this question – do I get more done when I am stressed than when I am not stressed? The answer is – yes I do get more things done – but the quality of what I do isn’t very high – the reason being that when I am stressed – I in essence run through my activities in this mood of chasing the time – trying to catch, and hold the time – and I am within that not centered here in my breath, and fully into what it is that I am doing here.

Thus – stressed people (stressed me) do not get more things done that non-stressed people (non-stressed me) – this is a lie. Within this it’s fascinating to see how I’ve still adopted a belief that I need stress as a motivational force in order to get things done in my life – and that without stress – apparently I won’t get things done.

This reminds me of some interesting facts that have been mentioned to me in relation to driving. Many tend to think that when you drive superbly fast – that this will get you to your location faster than if hadn’t driven that fast – yes – this is true – yet the amount of time that you earn upon driving very fast is really not that great in comparison to the risk you’re placing yourself at when driving really fast. The same can be said about stress – when you’re stressed you might move a little faster, and tick more boxes of you’re to-do list – yet what you’ve done is not really done – but more half-done – because you hasted yourself through the process instead of being here with and as breath.

So – there I have it – proof that stress is really not this powerful tool that I’ve thought it was – it really only servers to make me uncomfortable in my body, and to have me miss important points in relation to what it is that I am currently doing. Thus – stress – go away from my life.

Self-forgiveness

1. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that stress makes me move faster, and have me get more things to be complete – and that I will be able to do more things when I am stressed – within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand how stress makes me less effective in what I am doing – that I become absent minded – and that I miss important points because I am stressed and trying to get there – instead of being specific, and detailed here in this very moment that I am participating within here

2. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, perceive, and believe that if I let go of stress – I won’t be able to have any motivation to move myself in my reality, and complete tasks – and get things done – and within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand – that I am able to move myself by decisions – physically – and that do not require something more than me to move me – as stress – as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not let go of stress – and to move myself beyond the point of stress – in seeing that stress is really limited and not in-fact something that assists and supports me to improve, and become more effective in my day-to-day living

3. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist letting go of stress – in fear that if I do not anymore hold unto stress – and live by stress – and define myself according to stress – that I am then not going to have any sort of guide – knowing how fast, or slow I will move myself in my day-to-day living – within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to move me in the pace of breath – to move me in the pace of being here with my human physical body within and as oneness and equality

4. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify me becoming stressed within thinking that it’s normal to become stressed – and that this is something that everybody do – and not only me – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself with others – and to use others in order to hold unto shit that isn’t supportive for me – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not breath – and let go of stress – and see that it’s nothing that I will miss, and nothing I will regret myself for letting go off

5. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, and believe that stress gifts with a ability to understand, and comprehend more information – become more effective – more strong – and more directive in my life – and within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand that in being possessed with stress – I am simply missing my life – because I am not HERE – I am always over there in the next moment – trying to get something done – trying to accomplish something – instead of being here in this moment – and accomplish what is here for real

6. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move, and direct myself from within and as a starting point of lack of time – as feeling that I do not have sufficient with time – to be able to let go of stress, and fear – and apparently if I let go of stress and fear – then this will mean that I have even less time – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that time in itself doesn’t have anything to do with stress and fear – these are simply unrelated points – something that I have related in my mind through defining myself according to time from a starting point of energy – instead of being practical – physical – and standing with time from a starting point of seeing what is practical

Self-commitments

1. When and as I see that I am going into stress, thinking that stress makes me move faster – and have me complete, and get more things done – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that stress do not change time – it doesn’t give me more time – it merely makes me move more hasty and miss points in my life that are important – and within this I become sloppy; as such I commit myself to not move myself in stress – but to instead move myself in breath-awareness here – in the pace (peace) of breath – one physical foot in-front of the other

2. When and as I see that I fear letting go of stress, believing that when I do let go of stress I won’t have any motivation anymore – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I am able to motivate myself – move, and direct myself – and I do not require stress to do this for me – stress is really in-fact useless – because it doesn’t serve to assist me in handling my physical world and universe; as such I commit myself to focus upon my physical directive decision movement – and perfect this – instead of thinking that stress will in anyway assist me with self-movement

3. When and as I see that I resist letting go of stress, thinking that I require, and need to use stress as some form of guide to show me how to live in my world – and that I can’t do without stress – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that stress is a useless guide – it’s simply a energy – a reaction – and not common sense – not any guide really merely a energy-indicator saying “run, run, run!” – as such I commit myself to stop relying on stress – and instead rely upon – and use common sense to move and direct myself in my day-to-day living

4. When and as I see that I am justifying become stress, thinking that it’s normal to become stressed – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that stress is not normal – it’s something that is induced into the body through thoughts – and not a natural immediate physical expression here; as such I commit myself to stop stress – and not compare myself without others – but to stick with my self-honesty – and honor that

5. When and as I see that I am thinking that stress makes me more intelligent, and intellectual – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that stress makes me less capable of integrating, and understanding information – and in-fact makes me misunderstand information; as such I commit myself to not be stressed – but to instead breath – and be here with and as my human physical body

6. When and as I see, and notice that I am moving myself from a starting point as lack of time – as thinking that the more stress I move myself within and as – that the more time I will have; I Immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that – in moving myself from a starting point of lack of time – I am creating lack of time – because I do not stand equal to time – being realistic about what I am able to do within the time that I have at my disposal – as such I commit myself to be realistic with time – and to not plan millions of activities in a time space that isn’t made to handle that many activities – but understand the limits of time – and apply myself accordingly