Tag Archives: comfort zone

Day 454: Breaking Out of Monotony

I looked at at the following video yesterday by Cerise Poolman – and I suggest watching it if you can relate to living/having a monotonous life.

In my case, I can definitely relate to much of my life being routine/same old, same old. This is especially true when it comes to work and weekdays as they are so structured around the 8-17 schedule. And I can see how this stunts me, because I am very comfortable with each part of my weekday – it is in my deep comfort zone – and to get out of there while being at work is pretty difficult as I have done/repeated/tried the work so money times that I know most of it by heart.

Thus I can see that I have a need for more challenges and more time outside of my comfort zone. And I am completely aware that I thrive in such circumstances. I love being outside of my comfort zones and that is why I enjoy new jobs so much. It really brings me so much joy and pleasure. However, I still need to go to work, I still need to get money to survive, and thus that begs the question, how do I bring in challenges into my life right now, that is not dependent on where I work.

I do however see a couple of points where I can push myself outside of my comfort zone at work: I can read more, educate myself more on subjects that I find difficult to grasp/understand, and that I have pushed away because of that, I can engage more socially with my colleagues and be more active in this regard, I can network and develop my selling/persuasion skills and my CV more, find ways in which I am able to connect with people and companies, and also push myself to actively look for opportunities to increase my income. Those are aspects of my work that I have resisted and that I see can benefit from as a person if I explore and expand myself within.

When it comes to leisure life my greatest challenge, and where I see I have the most room for expansion, is in being present/active/engaged with my daughter when I take care of her. I have a tendency to do the bare minimum and be satisfied with that, but I see that I grow much as a person when I push myself to make something more with the time with my daughter. The resistance I have towards this is towards being intensely here, which my daughter always is – and I tend to experience that as exhausting. And that could be because this presence skill is like a muscle, you have to exercise and practice for it to grow into its full potential. And when I am with my daughter I am on a binge in exercising my presence skill.

I see that I can sit here for quite a while a look at various things that I could do to challenge myself and get out of my comfort zone. However, as a general principle, I would say that I want to become aware of the opportunities in my life to step out of my existing comfort boundaries, and to push for such opportunities if I notice that my life has gotten stuck in a rut. I want each day to bring something new – and for that – I have to be on my toes and ready to bite when I see an opportunity to experience/do something new and challenging.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get stuck in a rut by doing the same things over and over again and becoming satisfied with that monotony – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that by pushing myself out of my comfort zone and doing things I have not yet tried – I will grow and develop as a person and being – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push to create that spark of movement each day where I push myself out of my accepted boundaries and into the new and unexplored

I commit myself to be aware of and push for new opportunities where I can explore and experience new things – and to thus push myself to step out of my comfort zones and beyond that which I have known


Day 436: Too Easy-Going?

Is it possible to be too easy going? Too relaxed? To comfortable?

Throughout most of my life, I have had an easy time to remain calm. When others would go into stress or anxiety, I would usually remain placid. It has not been a skill/talent that I have actively developed, it has instead been with me from birth – even as a baby I was calm and content. And, it is clear that this calm has been a strength many times. However, it has also become a weakness.

I have realized that being calm and content, for me, it lead to creating apathy – which I would define as the characteristic of accepting what is here because it works – and not putting in the effort to establish and create what would be BEST for me instead. Another consequence was that, because I was calm and felt relatively at ease regardless of the situation, I did not develop the skill of actively engaging with my reality – asking HOW I want this situation to play out – WHAT would be BEST? Hence – I entrenched myself into a observer personality – where I just looked at what was going on instead of ACTING.

Thus, to answer my initial question, YES it is possible to be too calm. If calmness become the modus operandi, a constant, and further, a hiding place, to not have to put in the effort to put myself out there, to create, to actively engage, to actively participate and be a part of molding/creating/shaping my life/reality. Obviously, it is not being calm in itself that is the problem, what I see, is that being calm becomes a problem when I rely on this mode of being to bring myself through any and all situations – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding – that sometimes – other skills/expressions but calm are required to handle life.

Thus, something that I want to create in myself is to be more active and engaged in my life – and one solution that I have seen is the following: When I am in the midst of a situation, where I notice that I am going into observer mode, collapsing into a state of being ‘too calm’, that I take a breath, and ask myself, ‘What is that I want to create in this situation? What direction/movement would be BEST for me?’ – that I hence, as a first step – establish for myself what it is that I want – so that do not flow through the moment as an observer, indifferent to what is going on around me.

And this is a way of approaching situations that I can start to practice equally in moments when I am not retracting myself into an observer mode. For example, when I get to work in the morning, and I am about to begin my day, I see that it would be supportive for me to stop for a moment, to take a breath, and to ask myself how and where I want to go. This will assist and support me to develop drive and precision when it comes to actually creating/building the life for myself/others that I see is BEST.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get stuck in a state of being too calm – where I accept and allow my environment and my life to go without direction – and be less than best – because I am comfortable and at ease with things being half way best – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push and practice this voice within me of asking WHAT IS BEST? And then to motivate myself to pursue what is best – to not settle for that which works, that which is okay, that which is reasonable, but to in all parts of my life pursue and move towards that which is the best direction and movement

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept and allow what is not best, because it works, instead of pushing towards and pursuing that which is best – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that dissatisfaction, feeling discontent, can be supportive emotions – that assist and support me to break out of my comfort zones and to transform my comfort zones into zones that are best for me and others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not put in the effort and will to make each part and aspect of my life, my own, in the sense that I am actively involved in that part of my life, to create and make out of it, the best that it can be

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get stuck in the ‘I am comfortable’ quagmire – where I stop pursuing the best – and creating myself according to what I know is my potential – because my life is easy and I do not feel like changing anything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be too easy going, too comfortable and too flexible with my life, to the extent where I accept and allow myself to become satisfied and at ease with all kinds of unsupportive arrangements, that are not the best, but that works for me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to take a stand, and to make a decision as to what I will accept and allow, and what I will not accept and allow, to develop a relationship with my life, in the sense that I pursue and push for what I know is best – and do not settle only for what works and what is comfortable

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not ask myself, what is BEST for me and my life, and the life of others, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to settle for what is comfortable, instead of pushing for what is best

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not work to change that which I am not satisfied with, to not push and will myself to make the best out of my life, and to not accept things as is, only because I am not bothered by them

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself accepting my life to be as is, because I am not bothered by it, even though I know it is not for the best, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that I must push myself to make decisions for myself as to what I will accept and allow, and what I will not accept and allow, that it is not enough for things to just be comfortable, thing is, that they should be BEST – and thus I commit myself to push and will myself to bring through what is BEST in each and every circumstance – and not settle for that which works


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Eqafe Review: Developing Communication and Expanding Relationships

Today I’ve listened to a absolutely amazing interview called “Developing communications and expanding relationships” – and it’s a life-review interview from a being that has just recently crossed over, and now shared his insights in regards to the mistakes he made in his life.

The primary point of the interview is that we as human beings live in very small and isolated circles of relationships – we interact with a fairly small amount of people, and seldom do we dare to break out of our already created relationships and make contact with someone new. The reason as to why we so seldom do so – is because – as is explained in the interview – a cultural rule we carry within that says; “this isn’t how you’re supposed to do” – meaning you’re not supposed to make contact with new people for no reason but just to chat with them, and get to know them – it’s just not how we do things around here.

So, in essence – the reason why we choose to remain in such a small and secluded world is because we fear stepping out of our comfort zones, and going against this inner police man that wants us to follow this cultural rule that we’ve adapted ourselves to.

Obviously – living within and as this fear is utterly limiting, and I’ve realized through listening to this interview how I’ve limited myself in expanding my relationships through communicating, and initiating contact with new people; thus I will from now on push myself to walk through this fear and expand myself in getting to know and communicating with more people.

I suggest for everyone to hear this interview – it’s available at eqafe together with many other cool self-help – self-introspection products – go check it out!