Tag Archives: desire

Day 368: Trying To Relieve Stress for Money With More Money

It is not possible to achieve a state of fearlessness and comfort in using money through making more money – however – this is a belief that I have held and one of the prime driving forces that have motivated me to expand in relation to money. This is not a sound relationship to have in relation to money as is shown in THIS interview. An effective relationship with money is practical – money is something we earn to be use – to fulfill certain needs that must be directed to create an effective life – and that is it.

Money in itself does not cause stress – lacking money does not in itself cause stress – and having more is thus not something that will relieve stress – the ONLY solution is to look within and establish the actual cause of the stress – forgive it – and commit to change into a more effective way of life.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attempt to relieve anxiety and stress in relation to money through making more money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that more money will not relieve stress, rather me dealing with and directing my money fears will relieve fears – and thus I see, realize and understand – that in order to be effective with money – I must release and let go of all of these money fears

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear money because I believe that money is god over my life – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to serve my god, to serve my fears, and in the belief it will help me to retain and keep money in my life – not seeing, realizing and understanding, that the solution is not more money, the solution is to transcend and move through my money fears

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear money, and fear the system of money, and believe that I am inferior to money, and that a good way of ensuring a stable relationship with money is to fear and experience anxiety around money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that instead of fearing money, a more effective strategy to effectively work with money, is to learn about money, to develop practical money strategies and tactics so that I can use money more effectively in my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that money is a tool, and as with any tool, I have to learn how to use it effectively – and when I have any form of reaction or experience in relation to the tool – it will make me less efficient with money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear money, not seeing, realizing and understanding that money is not dangerous – and that in-fact – it is not money I fear – I fear what I have projected into money – which is that my life will fall apart – that I will lose control and fall

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not use my fears in relation to money to investigate and see myself – to get to know all my hangups so that I can transcend them – and move through them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior in relation to money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as incapable, and thus believe that I am incapable of getting money, and that I am incapable of handling my life without money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that money is the key to peace – and to believe that when I have achieved a certain amount of money, then I will be able to let go, to finally walk this earth without fear, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am in-fact limiting myself extensively by projecting my desire, and my want for peace into money – which cannot ever give me that – because with peace – I have to give it to myself through actually transcending and letting go of my emotional bodies

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the power I have to create, and that I have projected this power unto money – believing that money is the source of my inner and outer reality and that as long as I fear money – I have money under control and will thus be able to bring it into my existence on a regular basis

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forgive myself for fearing money – take charge of my relationship with money – and define this relationship as a practical and physical relationship – based within the practical premises of the physical – where there thus is nothing more or less than me handling and using money in the physical HERE

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself going into fear in relation to money, and motivating myself to have more money, through believing that I can get to a point of peace that way, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that it is not a solution to get more money as that will not give me peace – and it is not a solution to strive for peace through trying to achieve and get more material possessions – and in-fact it is not a solution what so ever to believe that something external can give me what I need on a internal basis – and thus I commit myself to bring my attention back HERE – to look within me at what is stirring – and immediately push myself to do self-forgiveness – apply corrective statements – and then live these in my physical reality – thus creating peace for and as myself

I commit myself to use money practically – and to develop a practical, physical and simplistic relationship with money – where money is a tool that I use – it is not more than or less than that


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Day 365: Conditioning Self-Expression

Today I took some time to direct a couple of my material belongings that had been put in storage. I approached the project with the starting point that I had to make a decision for each of my belongings as to what was going to happen to it – what purpose it was going to have for the future to come. The things which I had not used in a couple of years I decided to give away – this group of things included a saxophone and a electric drum set. The underlying principle I applied was simple, with me these possessions were not used to their full potential, and by giving them away to someone that would actually use them, that would support fulfilling both the recipients expression and the instruments potential; in other words – giving the instruments away would be what is best for all.

However, and here is where it starts to get interesting, as I had made the decision to give away the instruments, I began to have second thoughts, and the backchat that moved within me was something along the following lines: ‘What if I will miss these instruments? I might want to play them at a later stage, and then I will not have them! Man, before when I was a bit younger, I played a lot of music, now I do not anymore, I really miss that’. Thus, my initial backchat was initiated by a fear of loss, and then my mind moved to how I miss playing instruments and having music as a part of my life – that latter part of the backchat as well motivated by a fear – a fear that I had lost these expressions of myself which I had accessed when I was younger as part of playing my instruments and devoting myself to music.

The experience took me by surprise, because I had seen that I was finished with these instruments, that I had used them and that I was satisfied with what I had expressed and achieved, though now with this fear coming up, I started to doubt myself. I took a breath and gave myself a moment to stabilize – and I looked at the point within myself.

I could see that practically speaking, I did not use the instruments. Not because I was hindered to do so, but because I had moved into a new part of my life where these instruments did not have the same role to fulfill. I could see that I was satisfied and fulfilled in terms of having explored and pushed myself to develop a relationship with the instruments and that I was ready to let them go. Thus, the fear did not have anything to do with my practical reality – it was all about myself – and how I was actually afraid of moving on and embracing the new expression of myself that have started to come through within me and my life – where my relationship with music and instruments has begun to change.

Because music and the expressions that I could access and live with my instruments, they are still part of my life, however the structure of my life today is different. Now, I express myself with music by singing songs that I really enjoy out loud, together with a stereo blasting the track at the same time – and the creative part of music – which I before expressed through writing and composing songs – that has become part of my job – where I spend a lot of time writing – and my carpentry hobby – where I must use my imagination and problem solving skills to create and find solutions.

Thus – with giving away some of my instruments – I am not giving away the expressions that I have developed and lived in making music – because those expressions are a part of ME – as such I see that it is important to not get lost in the structure and picture of this world – and relate what I experience and live to the images – because it is not about what it looks like – it is about WHO I AM – and HOW I EXPRESS myself within what I do.

I have found that it is easy to forget this, because the images seems to be so important, however looking back out my life, what has always been a constant is that the images change. My world will move, transform, become different, but I remain, which also exemplifies why it is so important to place attention and focus on developing OURSELVES – and not lose ourselves in the evanescent creations/allures of money and consumerism that so easily grip our attention and that we convince ourselves is the most significant point within our lives.


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Day 361: Experiencing Real Life Versus Walking Process

With process, I have noticed that it can be easy to create a rift between on the one hand walking process and on the other hand, enjoying and living a fulfilling life – where the belief that is created is that these two points are mutually exclusive. In the beginning of my process, this rift was more pronounced, however as I have continued to walk my process, what I have begun to do is to INTEGRATE my process into my DAILY LIVING.

What I have seen is the following: There are certain tools that must be used to walk process effectively, among these we find writing self to freedom, self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements. In that way, process is confined to certain physical positions and movements. We must either sit behind a computer or with pen and paper in order to write, and sounding self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements, that usually requires that we are in alone. Those are the only parts of process that are bound to a certain time and space – because the REAL CHANGE process – that is walked IN daily life.

Thus, it does not make sense to separate walking process from living within and participating in our daily routines, walking our hobbies, interacting with friends, traveling, exploring, and experiencing the various opportunities of expansion that exists within life. Process should be a part of life. What I have seen, realized and understood is that if there is a sense of resistance/discomfort towards process, and feeling in a way, trapped by challenge that process represents, then there is a separation between walking process and the rest of our life – and the solution thus is to integrate process into all parts of our life.

Integrating process into our lives is simple, yet it requires us to be aware, ready and present – and open to challenge ourselves and how we have decided to live. This way of looking at and approaching process can open up new worlds to explore. For example, going to work, such a menial point, mostly seen as something undesirable, can become a way to get to know self and expand. It is thus all about WHO WE ARE within what we do – not about what we do.

This also relates closely with the point of future obsession and how it can be easy to get stuck in projections of the future and loose touch with the present. In-fact, it is not that important what we decide to do, what is important is WHO WE ARE – what we decide to do and who we decide to be within ourselves. Process, self-creation, self-expansion, and moving beyond what we considered possible for ourselves can thus be a integral part of all areas of our lives – and that is also the solution to stop separation – to stop the constant experience of conflict and separation that other wise reigns within us as we try to reach and attain the most luscious pasture that we can graze.

Thus, walking process is never something that is easy. It requires effort, dedication, diligence and movement – HOWEVER – we do not have to limit process to only certain actions and parts of our lives. Rather, process should be HERE regardless of where we are at, with process meaning that we at any given moment strive to improve, further, drive, and move ourselves to become MORE, BETTER and reach our utmost POTENTIAL.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my future, my purpose, my direction very, very seriously, and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget about life HERE, and that it is never about what I do, it is about WHO I AM – and that I can do all the apparent right things yet never move an inch within myself – because I have not actually moved WITHIN myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not bring my attention/focus/direction back HERE to myself – and place my attention on WHO I AM – place my attention on self-development – self-creation – and self-expansion in every moment of breath – to look at my daily living and see the obvious points of expansion that I can take on and begin to push those

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that a consequence of placing attention on the future, of creating conflict in relation to the future, conflict in relation to what I should become, how I should be, how I will experience myself in the future, is that I will loose touch with the physical HERE – loose touch with what is important and significant – which is my daily movement and direction HERE

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will not be able to live an interesting and fulfilling life if I make process part of my daily living – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that this is an illusion that I have created, a belief that my life will become less if I decide to integrate process as part of my life – while this is not true – and in-fact – only an excuse and a justification for me not to live and create fully – completely – and with all of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the more I integrate process into my daily living – the more I expand – the more I am able to see – the more fulfilled and stable I become – and in-fact – I miss out on nothing at all – life thus is not supposed to be separated from process – because what is life without the drive and push to change and move self to become the best self possible?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will loose myself if I make process a part of my daily living – a part of my every moment application – not seeing, realizing and understand – that I will not loose anything – but rather CREATE a new SELF – that will be able to walk through and do something worthwhile with life – instead of going through the motions and then ending up not doing anything at all

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself having resistance towards process and applying myself because I rather want to get on with my life and just experience it, I take a breath and bring myself back here – I see, realize and understand that this separation between process and life is an illusion, something that I have created in the belief that there is something more to be experienced but myself HERE – and thus in a way trying to run away from myself – and thus I commit myself to make process part of my everyday life – through integrating process in my life in moments and in parts of my life where I see that I must expand/move/direct myself – and in the parts where I see that I am already strong – by enhancing those strengths even more – thus actively making process a part of myself and my life


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Day 358: From Dreaming To Self-Creation

There is a big misconception in society. That dreams are meant to be followed and fulfilled, that dreams are something positive that we should have in our lives and that will motivate us to move forward. This is not true. In-fact, dreams most of the time cause a devolution to happen, instead of a evolution. The reasons for this are easy to see. Firstly, dreams are always created/experienced/felt within the mind. Hence, following and valuing dreams automatically causes a rift, where self gets separated from the physical living that is here. And instead of living, interacting, and expanding with what is HERE and REAL – self becomes consumed by the dream – and pursues a direction that is only based on this image.

It is similar to a drug addiction. The addict will be motivated by his urge to consume drugs and he will easily forget his reality in order to fulfill his desires, and according to the addict, what is of primary importance is to realize his addiction. In this state of mind, responsibilities, consideration and care for others as well as self, will be given secondary importance. The consequences of such a behavior is obvious – most of us have seen what drug addiction does to a human being if the addiction is allowed to continue for a prolonged time. And even though the addiction to dreams does not have the same visible and consequential outflows as drug addiction, dreaming still seriously impacts our ability to live effectively and consider the life of others.

However, there is another thing about dreams that is not understood. Dreams are not meant to be followed, in-fact, the function of dreaming is to be a way sign, a way to navigate and look at what is currently amiss within self as a living expression. The solution to dreaming is thus to learn to decode the dreams and see what they are showing about self and in that answer the question, what is missing within self that causes this dream to exist?

An example from my own life would be the following. I dream/desire to get a new power tool that would allow me to perform a new woodworking technique, and hence support me to expand and challenge myself in my hobby of woodworking. Looking at the content of the dream, the words that come through are NEW, EXPAND and CHALLENGE. Thus, what the dream is showing, is not that that I must have a new power tool. Rather, the dream indicates that I am not practicing living the words NEW, EXPAND and CHALLENGE in relation to my hobby of woodworking. And looking at my relationship with woodworking, I can see that this is true, and that instead of moving myself to take on new projects, I have accepted and allowed myself to wait, and hold back, believing that with the last project I finished, I was now allowed to feel satisfied with myself and put my woodworking hobby to the side for a moment.

The trick is thus to make the substance and essence of the dreams/desires that come up within us PRACTICAL and LIVABLE here – to make them concrete and put them into action – in such a way that we are able to live what our dreams show us instead of trying to align our reality to the visual content of the dream – because it is NOT about the visuals – it is about OURSELVES and our SELF-EXPRESSION.

To summarize and conclude: We look at the RESONANCE and SUBSTANCE of the dreams – the WORDS that can be read in between the lines – and put those words/expressions into PRACTICAL application in our Daily Living – that is the solution.


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lots_of_stuff

Day 338: Have You Become A Stuff Protector?

“A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.”

George Carlin

Stuff, things, pretty things, expensive things, nice things, old things, entertaining things, desirable things, unnecessary things, all these are part of the average lifestyle of the first world country human being, from beginning of life till the end, we are overwhelmed with stuff. We value the concept of ownership tenaciously, and most of us strive to expand our sphere of ownership in various ways – mostly through career and money – but also through experiential ownership in the form of memories, spiritual, religious or adventurous experiences, thoughts, education, and more. Objectively speaking, ownership is a not a problematic or consequential concept what-so-ever. To own is simply a verb that defines the action of having physical or mental control/possession over something. However, when ownership becomes feeling/emotional-based – and when we start to define OURSELVES – WHO WE ARE – according to our possessions, that is when this lifestyle must be put into question.

I recently read an article about a wealthy person that had been part of a long and tumultuous divorce process stretching over several years – and in the process – he had lost most of his belongings to his former spouse. What I found fascinating was how this individual, even though years had passed, was still investing time, effort and energy, in pursuing more court procedures, attempting to get back the things that he had once owned. In this person, I could clearly see the disturbingly  addictive quality that money and ownership can have, where without us being really aware of it, what we value and pay attention to slowly changes from ourselves HERE – to what we own, to our things, and what we want to have, and what we already have. What takes a back seat is LIVING – and what becomes the primary focus is MONEY and expanding our sphere of OWNERSHIP.

As I read this article, I could not help but reflecting on my own life, and how I have changed in many ways similar to this person since I was young. Because, when I was younger, from my years as a baby to my later teenage years, the focus within me was more on PHYSICAL living – and as I aged – this focus slowly started to change into money and ownership. I could see this pattern playing out even clearer as my partner and I built a house together. When the house stood finished, I started to have experiences and thoughts that were previously unknown to me. For example, a mistake that had been made in the building process, the shower was not placed correctly and as I had imagined it, that started to gnaw on me, and emotions came up of regret, judgment, fears and anxieties, all because my greatest and most valuable possession (the house I live in) was not built as perfectly as I desired, and thus, was not worth as much money as I had expected.

I took a while for me to realize what was going on, and how, instead of me using and owning my possessions as a practical part of my daily life, my possessions were internally owning and possessing me through constantly being in the back of my mind.

“He who looks after, takes care of things; forgets by and by that things were meant to serve him, and it does not strike him now when he started to serve them.”

Osho

Osho made some interesting observations about ownership. One of these is how we make ourselves a slave to our things when we relate to them using emotions or feelings, and thus make them part of WHO WE ARE – and by implication – making ourselves dependent on our things to be WHO WE ARE. For example, a master can only be a master if he has a slave, if the slave disappears, the master looses the thing he used to create his self-definition – thus causing inner conflict.

What can be learned from all of this? The way I see it, the point to understand is that possessions, things, stuff, are not part of WHO WE ARE – we were not born with them and we will not be able to take them with us when we die. The house that I built, and that I now live in, the various physical parts that constitutes the house were here before I was born, and they will continue to be here when I have died, maybe in the form of a house, maybe in some different shape – in any case – the house does not define me. Sure, I use the house, I live in it, and I can appreciate the various creature comforts it provides, but it does not define me. And that is the key to joyful living – to be IN this world – YET – not OF this world. To keep our jobs, care for our possessions, tend to our bodies, yet never forget that these things does not make us.

Children are inspirational examples that show what it means to be in this world yet not of this world. Children, they are not yet defined, limited, and confined within a certain lifestyle, position, or career – they are free to express themselves regardless of where they happen to be at the moment – and that is something we should all strive to create within ourselves – the FREEDOM to express even though we happen to live in a limited system that seldom allows us to bring that point of expression into full application.

I would like to end of with sharing one important point of consideration that I have come to realize with stuff. Many seem to believe that it is the stuff we own that ties us down, makes us materialistic, egoistic, possessive, and self-interested – that makes us forget the unconditional joy we could access as children – however – this is not the case. We must not accept and allow ourselves to blame our stuff, or believe that we through getting rid of stuff can erase and change our relationship with this reality and the stuff that populates it. Because the problem is and has always been ourselves, and our relationship with ourselves. Most stuff that we desire and want are but projections of our own inner state of lack, only there because we have not created ourselves to live according to our utmost potential – and thus – our desire to consume and acquire more things is in actuality a misdirected attempt to fulfill ourselves. It is the same process that occurs when people start to mold and shape their bodies to resemble images portrayed in media, believing that by attaining such a picture perfect body image they will feel whole and fulfilled – that is not the case – it is an illusion.

Hence, if you notice movements within yourself in relation to the things you own, it is a cool cross-reference point, because then you know that there are still points to work with. A feeling of desire towards owning more entertainment gadgets could imply that you are not yet sufficiently capable of entertaining yourself, or creating an entertaining life for yourself. The correction is thus not to sell your television, but rather to look at the underlying issue that creates the experience of desire.


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Day 335: Slowing Down

Of all animal species on earth, human beings is the only one capable of creating a dream/goal/vision, and then, walk through life with the sole focus of fulfilling that future point of creation. All other types of animals lives and creates in the moment with no particular idea of how they would like their future to look like. As much as this skill we have is what makes us powerful, extraordinary and capable of building magnificent things, it is also our greatest weakness, in particular when our drive/desire to bring something into creation ‘out there’ gets in the way of living and experiencing life on a day to day basis HERE.

To better understand this point I will share an example from my own life. All since beginning my university studies some 6 years ago, I have been very motivated to get through them and to dive into the world system and start applying myself in my area of expertise. This focus of mine was initially very supportive, because I was clear and determined, I knew where I was going and had a general idea of how I was going to get there. However, when I was about to finish my studies, and I applied for the last advanced courses, a doubt and insecurity started to creep up within me. I had achieved excellent marks and before me was a world of opportunities, though the problem was that I had no particular interest or passion in any field or area. For me, all the various focuses that I could decide to move into where the same. On top of this, there was a conflict within me, as to whether I should choose a focus where there was more money, or a focus that was more aligned with what I enjoyed to do.

This uncertainty grew within me and continued for a long while after I was done with my university studies. I just did not feel comfortable in deciding on a focus, on a direction, and on where I wanted to take my life. I felt like it was too much of a decision, because, what if I made the wrong decision? What if I after several years realized that I had moved in the wrong direction? What was I supposed to do then? At that point I would have wasted all of these years, when I instead could have made the right decision immediately. Hence, what became my focus was what I wanted to do in the future, not, what I wanted to do, and what I was already involved with HERE. Because, as I was having these uncertainties about my future, I at the same time enrolled in a advanced class, and I continued to pursue hobbies and leisurely interests – yet always with this little voice deep inside my mind reminding me that I did not really know what to make of myself in my future.

It is fascinating to look back and see how this pattern of wanting to know and be clear on who I am going to be, and what I am going to do in my future plays out, and what that consequences flows from this mind design. In trying so desperately to know what we going to create with our lives, we miss out on the actual real life process of creating and building ourselves, our days, our interests, our careers, and all of the various things that are included in this thing we call life. Instead of creation being HERE, in the moment, in the physical, something that we express naturally as WHO WE ARE, life then becomes mechanic, where we fill ourselves up with logical assessments and attempts at making final and conclusive decisions as to where we are going, FORGETTING that, life can only be effectively lived in the moment – and while it is possible to have a plan and general outline of where we are going – it is not possible to decide upon where we will end up eventually.

I had a chat with a friend of mine during the time when my uncertainties reached a peak, and she shared with me the following:

We often think that things only get moving THERE in the FUTURE – when all the while, to create that future – starts with EVERY DAY, that little you do to get things moving and building on it however much you can with each passing day.

This statement has been the SOLUTION for me to move out of my inner madness of continuously wondering about, considering, and looking at what I should do – and instead embracing what is HERE.

I find it fascinating how it is so, so easy to become overwhelmed and lost within feelings and fantasies of what we should be doing, want to do, feel like doing, resist doing, hope to do, dream about doing, instead of focusing on WHAT WE ARE DOING and what is POSSIBLE in the life we already live here. It is so easy to get lost in thoughts about doing and experiencing things that are not a practical or a realistic option, and at the same time, completely forgetting and missing what is right in-front of us.

Now, creation starts HERE, with the small and seemingly insignificant acts that things moving in the direction we have foreseen. If you have an urge to learn a new language, however, you have looked at it and realized that there is no time to do to pursue a course or travel a country where that language is spoken – then – instead of getting stuck in that state of wondering – look at of the box – what small thing are you able to do in your everyday life that will bring you closer to the goal that you have set for yourself. Maybe, one such act would be to buy a audio beginners language course and then practice and  learn the new language while driving to work?

When we SLOW the fuck DOWN – stop rushing and looking at what we must reach out there in the future – and bring our focus BACK HERE – that is when shit starts to make sense. Whatever it is that we want, on some level, it is already here and ripe for the taking – we just need to open our eyes – see it – and act.


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Day 333: The Lack Perspective

The lack perspective, this is a way of viewing myself and my world and that has begun to open up and become more clear to me as of late. Seeing things from a starting point of lack is basically how the world currently operates, and most people use lack as their motivation to get things done. An example would be our economy, that is measured and valued in growth, and where stagnation, or shrinkage, is seen as a failure – hence – the point with our economy is to move away from apparent lack and into growth. The same goes with education and children, where the standard way of viewing children is to see them as lacking character, experience, and perspective, and that society hence need to fill them up, push that lack away, and make the children useful and valuable.

Lack, what is missing, what is not here at the moment, this is how we have come to determine value, where hence value is created by fighting and suppressing the existence of lack, wherever it rears it head. It is however interesting, to see, realize and understand, that this lack perspective is not based on common sense, and it is not natural. Because is there in-fact lack? Or is it rather our judgment of what is here already? Where we see that things ARE NOT the way we want them to be (aligned to our ideals) and thus strive to mold, force, design our reality to fit our ideas, and in that completely missing what is here in this moment – and how we thus – do not work WITH what is here but instead FIGHT it.

I will give a practical example from my own life. A year ago I moved from a bustling and vibrant university town, where my days were filled with studies, and time for myself to bicycle, write, swim, and pursue other leisurely activities, to a small provincial town, where I started my first real full time job. On top of moving to a town with a different character, and now having most of my time occupied with the responsibilities of work, my partner and I built a house, and we are now on our way to have a child together – to put it mildly – my life changed quite drastically – from simple, easy, entertaining, to being challenging, and very, very different. I could no longer take my bike and ride the 3 kilometers into the town center to attend my lecture, as I instead had to take my car, and drive 30 kilometers into town, to work an entire day.

I have experienced this change as a form of limitation, where my life as it used to be, with all its ease and comfortableness, was gone, and that I am now stuck in a set of circumstances that are less than optimal. This is what has triggered the thoughts such as: ‘It was better where I used to be!’ – ‘I had everything going for me before, now I am having this life, which limits me!’ – this in turn have generated the experience within me of LACK – which is basically an emotional experience that feels like a empty whole – combined with a sense of longing and desire for something MORE – something BETTER – something DIFFERENT – and in this case – with me – longing back to the place where I used to live in the belief that this would sort out my issues.

Thus, the experience that came up within me, and that I have for a moment gotten myself trapped within, is LACK, and this emotional experience is combined with constant mind-chatter, dreams, projections, imaginations, of how I could have lived and experienced myself if I had been anywhere but here. I had gotten possessed by LACK – and this is where I began to see, realize and understand the deceptive nature of the lack-experience and how it pulled me into a particular way of viewing the world that was actually limiting me.

Furthermore, what is interesting is that I have actually been creating LACK by placing my focus on the emotional experiences of lack/missing/longing, because what am I doing in that? I am going into and accepting and allowing a mental state to become the starting point of my life – instead of CREATING my life here in the physical, moving myself here, and instead of going into lack, asking myself; what am I able to create with what is ALREADY here?

The solution to lack is thus to embrace self-creation as the constant movement and flow of expression that comes through when I push myself to remain here, to remain physical, alert, ready, directive, sharp and aware of what is going on in every moment – thus ready and able to act and create when and as I see that it is required. And self-creation happens HERE – in every moment – it is not something that I am able to access when I am in a lack experience – as then all my focus and energy goes into LACK – instead of CREATION.

Lack is self-created – it is something we bring through by placing our attention on what we do not have instead of focusing on what we have and what we can do with it.

The solution: Work With What Is HERE.


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