Tag Archives: motion

Day 294: Why Winning Is A Limitation

Is winning something good? Does winning benefit and support us in our expression?

It is normal to view winning as a positive experience. Winning is something most people strive towards, in various ways. Winning in our career through getting the best job, winning in our personal lives through having the best partner, winning in our education through having the best marks, and so on. Winning is a lifestyle that has become particularly accentuated in our fast paced lives. Though, there is a backside to winning, something that is easily missed or shunned, as the experience of winning is so tempting, exciting, and positive.

I will take an example from my own life which shows that becoming obsessed with, and defining oneself according to the experience winning is in-fact a limitation. It goes back to my years in elementary school. It was easy for me in school and I managed to get comparatively good marks. I was not necessarily the best, however, I was doing good – good enough for me to see myself as a ‘winner’. Then came a big change in my life, as my parents decided that our family was to move to another part of our country. I had to start a new school, and in that, I was now marked according to new standards. In this new school, I did not achieve the marks I had hoped for, and consequently, I went into an experience of feeling like a loser, and being depressed because I did not win anymore. This led me to struggle, fight, and push so that I could move myself forward in school, and get better marks again. To some extent I succeeded with achieving better marks at my new school, and again I went into that comfort zone of feeling like a winner – comparatively good at what I was doing.

Now, some might ask, what is the problem with this? You were quite good at school, had some problems, and then sorted it out, what is the story?

The problem is the fact that my drive, ambition, and push was always defined within the limits of energy and how I felt. I only pushed myself to excel and become better when I felt like I did not match my peers. Only then did it become relevant for me to go through the trials and tribulations to actually expand myself – and that is a LIMITATION. The fact is that, the moment we base our feeling of ourselves through comparison against others, we put a cap on our ability to excel, and expand. We only go as far as is required to feel feel good about ourselves, though not as far as we are able to take it.

Later in my life I decided to study law, and during this period of time I came to realize some important points about learning, self-expansion, and self-creation. I realized that if I want to become really good at what I am doing, I cannot use others as a benchmark. Instead, I must listen to myself, and be self-honest – I must be willing to admit to myself when I am not living to the utmost of my ability and then have the discipline to actively change myself. Having this perspective, studies, learning, work, and career becomes about self-perfection – it becomes about being the best that you are able to be – where there is no comparison – because you do it for yourself. That is also the definition of self-fulfillment – where you fill yourself through challenging yourself, through actively moving forward, through tirelessly looking at where, and how you can push yourself to become more.

Winning as such is a limitation because in making winning the focus you loose touch with yourself and your own potential. In winning, you have to conform to standards of what is considered right, and wrong – however your fullest potential might not even be able to be compartmentalized in such limited words as right, and wrong. Consider for example the work of Bruce Lee. He did not become the best karate or kung fu practitioner – instead he developed his own martial arts where he could express his own unique movements and physical characteristics fully. The same is true with any form of skill or ability that is being developed. To find and realize our full potential, we must do it for ourselves, we must listen to ourselves, and be open to what comes through from within.

The solution to this problem of being addicted to and driven by the desire to win is as such to let ourselves lose. Let go of the hierarchy, of who is the best, and who is the worst, and let us instead look at who we are, and how we can become the best version of OURSELVES. Let us find that innate and deep drive to develop and realize ourselves and make it the quest in all aspects of our lives to find out how much more we be.

Day 276: Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

One point that is missed by many of us, that wish to change a pattern of laziness, or demotivation, into movement, and self-creation, is that we forget to look at the rewards that will come due to such a change that we make. And because of this, the focal point of our decision to change ourselves becomes ‘the problem’ and ‘the ton of shit we must walk through to change’. Thus, when we decide to change, it is important that we clarify for ourselves what the rewards of that change will be; what are we going to get out of changing? What will we be able to create, how will our lives change, and how will the experience of ourselves change?

Why is that then important? Because if you do not establish what you will get out of changing, you will not have that drive, and motivation to keep at it, to keep moving forward, to push through even though it at times might feel hard, and overwhelming. The reward is your carrot; it is the fuel that you inject into yourself that will keep you afloat when you feel like sinking back into a comfortable state of laziness, and apathy. It is in that moment your reward will come up within you, and within that you will be able to see the value you will be creating for yourself if you walk the talk, push through, and realize your decision for yourself.

Hence, before you start your process of self-change, and walking through your established behaviors of laziness and apathy, take a moment with yourself, sit down, and look at what will change in your world when you bring the decision you are about to make into reality. For example, you will now be able to do all those things that you before tended to procrastinate, immediately, and within that you will get more time with yourself, where you will be able to sit back, relax, and with a clear conscience, dedicate yourself to your hobbies. Then, your relationships will improve, because people will now notice your change, and see that you are more dependable, reliable, and trustworthy, and this might also impact on your career and job opportunities.

When you change yourself, you will also be able to stand as an example for others, and show them how it’s possible to redesign, and reinvent yourself, and you can share your story of how you went from a coach potato into actually doing something with your life, to the benefit of yourself and others as well. Because, we need more of these people in this world, we need more people that show others that change is possible, and that we do not have the stick to the limiting behaviors, and routines that we accepted and allowed ourselves to develop as we grew up and came of age. And, we need more people that actually care about themselves enough that they decide to do something with their lives, and push through the difficulties and hardships that might arise as one make a decision to bring an idea into reality.

Thus, remember, when you make the decision to change, you are not only doing it for yourself. You will influence and have an impact on many, and many of those that you inspire, you will probably not be aware of, but within them you are going to create that small burst of excitement, and awaken that slumbering voice, saying: “What if I could change? What if I could become as effective as he/she?” – and being able to awaken that latent urge to expand is an awesome gift that you are able to give.

With this blog I am concluding my series on Creating Movement. I hope you have enjoyed this series of blogs and found some inspiration to start your own process of self-change. I know that it is possible, I have myself been a lazy person, and now I am not – and that was a change that I managed to bring through by following the steps that I have outlined in these series blogs. Becoming a motivated and driven human being is thus not something you must be born with, it can be created, and that is the beauty of life – we can create and bring into reality that which we see is supportive, and remove that which we see is destructive. Laziness and apathy are destructive forces, both on a personal, and existential level, because when there is no drive, and motivation to push forward – how can we create the best possible life for ourselves and each-other? It is simply not possible. As such, get yourself in gear and develop that motivation and drive – we are all able to do this for ourselves.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 261: Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance

In this blog we are going to look closer at some practical solutions for resistance, that I have found works effectively. There are four applications that I have discovered helps a lot when that resistance comes up from within – and I will be walking through them in order.

Be clear on you new direction

The first solution is to be clear on your direction. In order to be able to walk through that tough, and difficult moment, when the resistance comes up, and you do not feel like doing anything, it is important that you have your direction in place. Basically this means the following: You know WHY you are changing, you know HOW you are going to change, you know WHAT will happen if you do not change (consequences) and you know WHAT will happen if you change (rewards).

If you are not clear on these points within yourself, you are going to find it much easier to give in, and give up when the resistance towards movement comes up from within. The reason for this being that you have not established a purpose, and reason for yourself, you are trying to change something, yet you are not entirely clear on why, how and what you are changing. Thus, my suggestion is that you sit down with yourself, and write out your reasons for changing.

Lets take an example from my own life, my law-studies. Now I experienced resistance towards studying and reading the course literature, though I knew that I had to do it in order to be able to pass my exams. Thus, I wrote about the point and established the following: I am changing this resistance into actually reading my books BECAUSE (why) I want to be able to earn my living as a lawyer. I will change this resistance through (how) sitting down and reading my books for two hours every day. If I do not do this for myself, I might not be able to pass my exams, and thus I cannot become a lawyer (consequence). Though if I do sit down and read the literature, I will pass my exams, and be able to have a enjoyable and challenging job in my future (reward).

Placing it before myself in this way I was able to clearly see the value in changing myself, and why I had to do it – and this helped me to push through in those moments when I did not feel like reading or putting down any time in my education.

Stick with your body

The next solution is to Stick With Your Body. Now, what does that mean? Well, look at it this way: Resistance is a energy that comes up from within, telling you to act and behave in a certain way – and this energy will feel real and overpowering when you go into it, start feeding it, paying attention to it, and change yourself according to it. But, if we take a look at your physical body – you will see that regardless of the resistance that comes up within you, it will still be there, the heart will still be beating, lungs and breathing working perfectly – most parts of the body will be stable, still and the same as before the resistance – and this is important to notice.

Resistance as such does not affect the body and instead the body moves itself on the basis of practical considerations, and if it would not do that – we would be dead a long time ago. Thus, if you, instead of going into the resistance energy, place your focus and attention on your breathing, and the sensations of your physical body – this will allow you to use the body as a point of grounding/stabilization. And when you stand with the body, on the ground, you are going to notice a fascinating thing: The resistance does not have power over you – it is only a energy – and regardless of its intensity you are still able to decide on how you move within and as your human physical body.

To sum it up: The body/physical matter transcends resistance – and when you stand with the body – you will be able to use its stability and groundedness to support yourself to move through the resistance and come out on the other side.

Know your enemy

The third solution is to know your enemy, and with this I do not mean that you should go into war with resistance and your mind – no – what I mean is that it is important to understand how resistance moves, and when it moves. My observations on this point is that resistance moves in quickly, and will peak after a while, but if you continue to move through the resistance, it will run out of fuel and die out. As such – resistance does not last – it has a due date and if you stick to your guns, and continue to move, resistance does not stand a chance.

Accordingly it has been supportive to me to, every time a resistance comes up within me, say to myself that: ‘Okay, here are you resistance – though you will not be here for ever!’ – and then I continue to push and walk through the experience. This helps because you get to understand that even though it feels overwhelming and tough, there will come a moment when the resistance is going to dissipate and you will be home through.

And then – its also supportive to know WHEN the resistance usually arise, because then you will be prepared, you will know what is coming, so that you can implement your new direction immediately as you sense that lingering urge to just not do whatever it is that you are supposed to be doing.

Just do it

The last point, and possibly the most potent of all the solutions I have walked through, and by far the most simplistic, is to: Just do it. No rocket science here – though fascinatingly enough – we tend to forget this fact and instead of moving, and directing ourselves in the physical, we start asking ourselves why we do not change, if there is something we have missed, or if there is something wrong with us, because we just cannot seem to change. I am here to tell you that there is nothing wrong with you; all you have to do is to do it. When you resist something, you take a breath, and move yourself to do it. It cannot be simpler.

So, when you find that you are wondering, or looking at potential reasons as to why you are not becoming more disciplined, then you know that ‘Shit! I am not actually DOING it!’ – and this serves as a nice alarm to know that its now time for you to get on with the doing – stop thinking about it – Just do it!

Next blog

So, these are my four practical solutions for dealing with resistance. Test them out, play around with them, and see what works for you. Maybe you will find that a combination of the applications or slightly changed application will work better for you. Transcending and learning to direct resistance is a personal process, and thus what works for me, does not necessarily have to work for you – though at least you know have some basic tools that you are able to start with.

In my next blog I am going to go into and explain the Rewards that come when you start moving through resistance, and begin your life of self-creation – it is a truly remarkable experience and the blog will definitely be worth reading.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards

Day 250: Drive, Passion, and Excitement

Drive, passion and excitement – three words that so many of us look for in life, I myself not excluded, which is why todays writings will be dedicated to this point. To illustrate my issues with these words, lets have a look the popular TV-series: Suits.

In suits, which is about lawyers, everyone is working, basically, all the time – and each and everyone is driven forward by the desire for money, the desire for success, and the desire to win. Looking at this description of the characters lives, it does seem like they have a very bleak and colorless existence, though, in the series, the characters are portrayed as having the time of their life. They are working all the time, and exude such a drive, excitement and passion – it looks like working as a lawyer every second of every day is the best thing that ever happened to them, and what they want to continue to do forever.

So, when I look at suits, I have perceived that this drive, passion and excitement can only be experienced in relation to work, within a specific profession – as such believing that what I do defines who I am – and that if I change what I do then this will change who I am as well. Now, it’s a big mistake to believe this because what happens when we do? Well, we have to start running after, searching for, and try to get to that position and point in our lives where we believe we will feel satisfied, where we believe that we are going to find our purpose, and our passion – which in the worst case scenario might mean that we will search forever, until we die, and still not ever be able to find anything that sparks our interest.

Thus, the solution to this problem is to stop searching, stop trying to find – and instead realize that these words: Passion, Drive, Excitement – they can be lived in our personal lives – I can live them in my daily life as Who I Am – And thus not anymore be dependent upon life-circumstances to be the way I hoped and imagined that they should for me to be able to live.

How am I then able to live PASSION in my daily life?

Passion doesn’t have to be a feeling – instead it can be my focus, my dedication, and my complete commitment to what it is that I am doing in this moment – where I pass-it-on. Here I can thus live passion in my physical reality through really getting my hands dirty, and when I do something, be here fully – really do what I am doing – experience what I am doing, be intimate with what I am doing, be involved in what I am doing – which obviously requires me to be here in my physical body.

Further, passion is something that I can live when I am walking a particular point in my life, through doing it to the best of my ability, to want the best possible result and not accept and allow myself to be satisfied with something done only halfway. When I decide to walk a point – I instead commit and devout myself – push to find the best solutions, the best direction, and create the best possible outcomes – that is living passion physically in my daily life.

How am I able to life DRIVE in my daily life?

Drive is basically the same as self-directed movement – it’s when I make a decision to do something, and then I do it, and I don’t only do it to be done, and finished, so that I can move on to the next point – no – drive implies that I do it full on and that I push myself to walk the point as effectively as is possible. Drive is when I don’t accept and allow myself to be satisfied until I know that I’ve pushed myself with what I am walking, and I have given it my utmost attention. That is drive: The willingness to move forward and push for excellence.

How am I able to live EXCITEMENT in my daily life?

Excitement – is it necessary to feel excited, in order to live excitement? No – I don’t see that it is necessary – instead excitement is something that I can live and express through my willingness to commit myself to life, to the moment which I am participating in, the willingness to be here fully and exceed-my-self – basically push myself to be completely involved in this physical moment HERE – and not accept and allow myself to go off in my mind where I think about future playouts, things that might happen, things that might not happen, and so on.

So, this is how I see that I can change these words, and bring them into my daily routine, make them part of my life, which means that I don’t have to become a lawyer, or look like Harvey Spector (main character in the suits) in order to live a fulfilling life – because instead – I create myself as fulfillment – I create WHO I AM and thus within that I define my experience within what I do.

There ain’t no free choice only consequence

Take in consideration the outflows of your participation
Take a breath before you speak so there is no toxic leak
Because what goes around comes around ain’t nothing you can do about that
There ain’t no free choice only consequnce
Accumulate what is best for all
That is life’s call

When energy is in motion breath is like a healing lotion
And if you speak and only shit comes out to stop it that’s what self-forgiveness is all about
Because what you do will come back that’s just the way it is
There ain’t no free choice only consequence
Accumulate what is best for all that is life’s call

No matter what you feel here is the deal
It’s a system of energy fueled with thought that isn’t real
So be aware of what you say in your head
Because you’ll be alone with it at night lying in your bed
There ain’t no free choice only consequence
Accumulate what is best for all that is life’s call

To end this song in a nice what listen to what i have to say
You’re a pre-programmed machine set in ups and downs, smiles and frowns, highs and downs
Thus look at yourself as if you see someone else
Nothing is personal it’s just layers and shells upon shells
See you got no choice there is only consequence
Accumulate yourself to be free
And then help others to see

Check out this song as well: