Tag Archives: movement

Day 424: Big Changes In Small Steps

There is this notion that change must imply something big, massive – one decisive revolution – one impactful movement that puts everything on the line. What I have noticed within myself is that  this belief about how change takes place often has discouraged me from pushing to make the apparently insignificant changes in my life. When I have considered changing these aspects, or contributing to society in a small way, by for example engaging in a political group, I have thought that there is no use – it will only bring about so little – there is simply no meaning to it – hence I will not do anything at all.

This kind of thinking shows us two belief systems. One of them is that we alone are too small and insignificant to make any kind of lasting impact in the world. The other is that what we do and how we live in our day-to-day life does not matter – and that we have to become president, famous, a star, to have any form of influence. The result of living out these belief systems is that we do not do anything at all – and that we do not push for the small improvements in our life – because we believe them to be of no worth. We do not even push ourselves to correct our immediate relationships – because what is the use? It will not create any lasting change anyway.

And it is interesting as well to observe how people that have lived so called successful and influential life’s, many times have had massive issues in their private relationships. They have only been able to live their passion to improve and expand outwardly into the system, and not been able to share this process with their close ones. And many times the personal hell they created not only for themselves but also for those around them caused deep ripples. Hence – it is important to remember that all types of change for the better are important – not only those happening out in the world system.

The key is to stop valuing and comparing the movement to improve, to empower and to change. We have to understand that each and every step forward that is taken is needed no matter how small it was. And that the interesting thing about change is that it takes place in the small, in the parts that are barely noticeable, and then one day, the small parts have together formed so much momentum, that what seems to be a big and overwhelming change takes place over night. However what has been missed are the small, apparently insignificant actions, that brought about that shift. And this can unfortunately go both ways. We are also able to accumulate acts that are negative and that diminish us – and then after a while – we notice the destructive end result without being able to see how we got into such a bad situation. This is the magic of accumulation in the small.

The same principle of accumulation can be found in how what we think will eventually influence what we speak, and that what we speak will eventually influence how we act, and that our actions will eventually become our habits and our general character. In when we are at the end of such a process – it seems as if it has always been that way. For example – we have apparently always been lazy and there is now nothing we can do about it because it is such a big and general characteristic to change. However creating that laziness was a process that initially started in the small, in the minuscule, in the barely noticeable, with apparently innocent acceptances and allowances, that then got bigger, bigger and bigger.

Hence – anyone that feels that change – whether in the system or personally – is too much – and because of that does not do anything – remember that change takes place in the small and manageable. Change takes place in our sphere of influence – and unless we are HERE – PRESENT – and WILLING to act we will miss our moments of opportunity – because you will have opportunities – every day to take the path you desire for yourself, your fellow man and our common future.


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Day 416: Children of the Future

This week I have begun my mornings by stating:

“I am mother earth, I am father sky, and I am the children that will become the future of this world”

Stating this each morning has helped me to be more stable in the face of the current situation in the world – because it is easy to lose hope – it is easy to lose interest, faith, creative juice, desire and want to change and to make a imprint on this existence. It is easy to think that I am only one person, and what can one person do? Because it feels like the world is so, so big, controlled by such powerful interests, and that I am so, so small, insignificant, and unworthy.

However – what I have realized is that I am the future – in each breath, with each word, with each action, I am involved in this world, and I am involved in creating the future. It might feel as if it something that is beyond my grasp, though it is not, it is right here. And each morning when I wake up, I can either approach my day within this stance, that I am here to create a better tomorrow, or I can approach with a sullen indignation and hopelessness, thinking that there is nothing to be done. For me the choice is easy, I want the former approach. I want to make this life count, and I want to make myself count, one voice, one vote, for a better me, a better future, a better reality for everyone.

It is important to not become engulfed in the state of the world as it exist at the moment. What is here is not the end, it is the beginning. What is here has been created over centuries, and it will take a long time to change – however as with all journeys – it begins with a single step. And if there is a clear decision, a steadfastness and consistency, then time does not matter – the point has already been created and what is left is to walk it into manifestation. It is similar to making a movie – when the script is done it is only a matter of shooting it.

To be the children that brings the future – one point that must be practiced is being open, receptive and interested in solutions. I see many that loose themselves in a state of complaining, diminishing, finding fault in others and themselves and criticism. And many times they can clearly see and outline the problems – however – they do not script a solution – the remain at the stage of seeing – and that is not enough. What matters is what we do when we see. An effective response would be to investigate what we are able to do to change and bring through what is best – and then act on that. Children do not hold preconceived notions. When they see a problem, they find a solution to it – and they are open to the fact that every problem have a solution – there is nothing that cannot be solved and directed. And whereas we as adults might give up before we have even tried, because we push ourselves down harshly within our own minds, children go for it. And that is something I want to emulate. To approach the world fearlessly and without beliefs as to what is possible and what is not. Change within and change on a global level is not a dream – it is a possibility – and to get there we must begin walking.

However it is true that change will not come through by waiting for external forces to move – and why should we wait? The future is created in the small and seemingly insignificant actions that make up a usual day. We might not see it, but each day holds potential for movement, exploration, creation and expansion. The challenge is to see and even create those moments and to act. Too many adults become dull and boring – they loose touch with their wit, strength, power, playfulness and drive. For them life becomes a series of uneventful days all about survival and making it through to the next day. Their eyes become hazy and unfocused, and their voices become monotone and slack. Children are not like that. They are bustling, feverish, intense and driven, they explore and are curious about the world around them, and they make sure that not a moment is lost. They are hungry for the life that is here to be experienced and lived.

Thus, we adults, we must embrace and live the fact that we are the children that will bring through the future in this world. And each day adds a brick, in the brick wall, that is the world we share together. And either, we can approach as adults, believing that there is no chance in hell that can we do anything, or we can approach it as children, with the understanding, that what we do will ripple out into the world and have an effect. We are not alone in this world, we are all dependent on each other, and what we do, will have an impact. And even if we are not yet able to see it, and perhaps, will not be able to see it in our lifetime, the ripples are there, undeniably. As children, we must be unconditional, and create our ripples, and not accept and allow our motivation to become bound to external events – we must move from within that deep, bountiful, limitless playfulness that is the hallmark of children everywhere. That is where we will find the patience, steadfastness, drive and motivation to last for a lifetime.


Day 414: Public Speaking and Creativity

During last week I was away on a 3-day course. It was very intense, with scheduled activities from nine in the morning till ten o’clock at night. One of the lectures was about rhetoric and how to speak with a crowd to arouse interest and curiosity – and that was something I passionately enjoyed. I remembered how amused I was by the creative and expressive arts, such as theater, music and painting. Those expressions are part of my nature and activities I have to give myself space and time to indulge in – if I want to experience the full pallet of colors that is me. It was interesting, that I did not really notice how my own passion and enjoyment was coming through – until after the course, when I came back to work and one of the secretaries pointed it out to me.

What I enjoy about public speaking is that there is a nerve to it, there is a performance. The thing about performances is that you have to be fully present, and you have to dare yourself to step out of your comfort zone. It is not possible to hold back, because everything depends on you. If you do not open your mouth, move your body, or do whatever you have set out to do, there will be no performance – there will be no act. I also appreciate the freedom of expression that is available in public speaking. You are bound only be the limits that you have created. One and the same topic can be approached in a thousand different ways, and it can be delivered in as many ways as there are people on the planet. Our voice can be soft, stern, sleek, whispering, or, silent. Our body language can be engaged, held back, impressive or intense. There are so many ways to frame ourselves.

However I do see, realize and understand that I am not able to practice public speaking everyday and everywhere I go – though – I still want to experience and bring creativity, inspiration and enjoyment into my life. Thus – I see that I must apply and live these words everywhere – however in particular – when it comes to speaking and interacting with people. I tend to hold myself back and fall into self-created limitations when I interact with others. And it is these limitations that I want to break through – that is what pleasures me – when I move through fears and anxieties and allow myself to express creatively.

And it does not necessarily have to be speaking with people. Creativity can be applied and lived everywhere. It can be applied in for example, driving a different route to work, adding new and different spices when cooking, reading a new kind of book, about a topic that feels as distant as Pluto. I would say that the main component of creativity is to be open and excited about trying new things, seeing how it fares, and enjoying the process – and not accept and allow fear of failure, or fear of losing control to stifle. The process of creativity is a walk into the unknown – it is about venturing into undiscovered spaces – and maybe that is why so many have difficulty bringing in creativity into their lives? They fear the unknown, the uncontrollable, the opaque – however – that is the charm. Do we really want to live a life that is in all its facets calculated, exact, without surprises, without uncharted avenues, without any sense of adventure or opportunity for change and expansion?

And that is why I will strive to bring more creativity into my life at large and explore the various ways in which I can realize this word in my daily living. And even though I have a desktop job, and most of my day is spent sitting in an office, I am convinced that there is much still to be explored. Being creative is not something that can be made dependent on the environment – creativity in itself comes from within and is something we have to nurture and actively bring through into our life’s.

I will in the coming week explore this word – and report on my progress.


Day 403: Directing Conflicts

The theme of my week has been conflicts, primarily in relation to money, however it has also touched other subjects. It has been interesting, because I have been both on the receiving end of criticism and complaints as well as on the giving end of criticism and complaints. Having had a taste of both worlds – it opened up some interesting realizations.

I realized that the normal way we tend to approach dissatisfaction with products/services is by anger/frustration. We feel harmed and unjustly treated – and we approach the other person in that state of anger/frustration and discontent. Oftentimes this results in more conflict, more irritation, more anger, and more confusion. We start to fight instead of coming up with solutions – and we believe that the other person is out to get us – instead of seeing that it could be a honest mistake – and that we could potentially have a mature, and stable discussion about what we are unsatisfied with and find a solution together.

A better way to approach conflicts is by being humble, being open to hearing the other perspective and being open to consider solutions that are mutually effective. Disputes where both parties decide to go full on for their own desired outcome with no quarters are really destructive. In a best-case scenario, one of the parties’ wins – in a worst-case scenario – both lose. Fighting, it always creates losers, which is why it is pretty fascinating to see how often we choose this route. And it is not because of reasons that we can explain rationally, it is because of how we feel – and we seek our perceived version of justice through the conflict. The problem is that we seldom see the problem, the area of conflict, with any clarity because everything is very much shrouded by our own self-interest – and having regard and empathy for our opponent can in such a case feel like a weakness. Though it is the ability to keep a cool head and place ourselves in the position of the other party that will allow us to find a solution that is going to work both for the other and us.

Another difficult emotional experience that can make conflicts hard to solve is idea that we have to stand by our feeling of being wronged because it is a matter of principle. The problem is that the ‘principled’ party is unable to consider anything else but their own principle, or rather, their own emotional experience. The ‘principled’ party will thus seldom be able to expand their seeing to take into consideration the other party as well – and will oftentimes stick to their demands stubbornly. And there will be a great fear of letting go of the emotional experience because of the belief, that if we do, then we have admitted defeat. That is obviously not the case. Defeat is subjective, and in the case of conflicts, defeat would be to not find a solution that is effective and works for both parties.

Conflicts are a natural, recurring and big part of social life. It comes through in nearly all type of relationships, whether with humans or animals. Learning to deal with conflicts is because of that an important skill to acquire. A basic component of dealing with conflicts effectively is communication. I would say that bad communication and the consequential misunderstandings are the prime reason for the creation and continuation of conflicts.

Recently I have watched a Danish TV series that is about a collective with young people that are brought together in order to research their personalities and behaviors. Naturally, many conflicts, emotional experiences and misunderstandings occur. For example, two people initiate a sexual relationship hurriedly. One of them does not see a future with the relationship, the other falls in love. Neither of them communicates their experiences. Thus the one that is not interested in continuing feels bogged down and stalked and the one feeling in love feels rejected and becomes increasingly sad and emotional. And the conflict is created because neither party communicates about how they feel, their intentions and their aspirations.

The reasons why we decide to not communicate in such situations probably differ from person to person. If it would be me, I would most likely hold back because of fear of being vulnerable. However others might not share their experience because they believe the other person already knows. Sometimes we become so lost in our thoughts, and they become such a big part of our life, that we believe that everyone else has access to them as well. However, that is not the case. In order to break through and find solutions we must dare to be vulnerable and also understand that we cannot expect anyone to understand unless we have communicated and clarified our position. It is basic common sense and still it is normal to lack such basic skills of communication.

Another example that read of in a book about learning how to negotiate is the following. Worker A is pissed off because his chief B always selects him to lead the one of the most physically exhausting undertakings. He thinks that B is singling him out and is punishing him. Thus A decides to contact his union and refuse to follow orders. B on the other hand reasons that because A is one of is best and most trusted workers, he chooses A to head the difficult undertaking, because then B knows that the job gets done. This is a clear-cut example of how the lack of communication creates conflicts. If A would have voiced himself and if B would have explained is reasoning, there would most likely not have been any issue between the two.

Thus, to summarize: To avoid conflicts, effective communication, empathy and openness are required. We must embrace the possibility that the other party is not necessarily evil, but that there might be a misunderstanding or a miss-match of expectations. Through communication we are able to find and resolve differences and establish solutions that work for both parties.


Day 391: Create Purpose In Everything

I have spent much time looking for a purpose – THE purpose – THE direction – THE way forward. In everything from work, to leisure time, partner to involvement in organizations – I have wanted to find THE right way forward – that which I was meant to do. I have believed that this purpose of mine was already designed – ready for me to step into – my only task was to find it. It is in design similar to religion and faith.

Because I was looking for THE purpose – I was always in a state of doubt. Many opportunities came my way – and I grasped some of them – however – always with a nagging emotion of doubt deep inside of myself. I thought to myself: ‘What if this not the right way? What if this is wrong? What if I should be doing something different?’. And that is the problem with relying on someone or something else to create a purpose for me. How do I know that it is the right one? I might step into the wrong one – and what will I do then?

This is why I have decided to let go of this limited definition of purpose. And it is suitable that recently in the Desteni group a new definition of purpose has opened up – ‘Mini-Purposes’. The meaning of ‘Mini-Purposes’ is that everything in our lives can potentially be directed into something supportive that allows us to expand and grow – and to help others do the same.

Let us take a normal weekday. We get up, go to work to make money and long to get home the entire day. Then we go home, cook food, and long to be able to sit in the couch and look at TV for a moment before we go to bed. Then we sleep, wake up and restart the process. Our entire day has passed without us engaging at all. We just moved through it all without effort or direction – doing what we always do – thinking what we always think – longing to be somewhere else. And what is funny is that – part of our day – we might have spent looking at and imagining what our purpose might be.

Now compare this to living a weekday in the following way. We get up, and use those moments of waking up to check in with our body, take some deep comforting and relaxing breaths – and we make breakfast as a moment of enjoyment and pleasure. Then we go to work – where we push to develop an aspect of ourselves – for example – learning from colleagues – looking at what are their strengths and how we are able to emulate such expressions to empower ourselves. Then we go home – and push ourselves to be present and develop a connection with our family members. And then we go to bed – and before we fall asleep – check what we can change/strengthen till our next day.

The latter way of living is purposeful – it is living a weekday with passion, fire and effort – striving to make that which might seem ordinary – to our story of movement and expansion – where we learn and inspire others to become the best that they can be. There is so much potential to be harnessed – and part of what makes it difficult to grasp this fact is that we believe that purpose must be something grandiose and big – out there! No – that is not true – there is purpose in everything – however we must design it – we must create it – we must give ourselves purpose within our lives.

The difference between living a fulfilled life and a unfulfilled one is that in the former – we decide to FILL our lives with DIRECTION and PURPOSE. Nothing is there only by coincidence – nothing is there only as a chore and trite requirement of survival – it is what we make of it.

This also brings up the point that creating ideas of a purpose out there can be very limiting in terms of actually beginning the process of living purpose. Looking at myself – many of my purposes have been conditioned by location, time, by a variety of external factors being fulfilled. For example – at one time I wanted to become a movie director – and all of my energy and effort was directed into this dream. However – during this process of becoming and reaching my purpose – I neglected the life that was around my – I became monotone and lost track of my Mini-Purposes – my opportunities to create Mini-Impacts and Mini-Ripples – and to live a fulfilling life here instead of waiting for life to happen.

Dreams of the future can be useful in terms of creating a direction – however – they can never substitute real fulfillment – because that will only always be developed, expressed and experienced HERE. The challenge is thus to develop our Mini-Purposes and LIVE them in reality. To make everything matter – and stop waiting.


Day 389: The Power of Unity

I have recently become fascinated with the amount of groups/purposes/directions/movements that exists in this world. There are millions upon millions, and the internet exacerbates as well as makes this point visible. So many seem to have something important to say – a message, guide, idea, belief, method – it goes on and on and on. Only on Youtube you will encounter a vast array of various channels – each trying to lure you in and convince you that their way is the right way – wanting you to listen to and follow their specific niche.

It is pretty ridiculous that we have become so separated and split into various groups/interests/niches – however it shows us an old problem. Our tendency to make our own personal life, thoughts, plans, ideas, feelings and emotions – the PRIORITY – and missing that there are others in life as well – or rather – a whole existence to take into account. Hence – even if we want to make it out to be as if our world is all about ourselves – that is not the case.

It seems to me that one of the reasons why there are such a vast array of groups and directions is because we personally want to feel as if we have created something new. Many of us desire to become famous, important and feel as if we have left a mark in this world. We want to have our own personal message and invention – and we want that to be acknowledged. What is unfortunate is that this desire creates separation. This issue is easy to see with for example altruistic groups and non-profit organizations. If you do some investigation – you will find that there are many, many, many such organizations. On their own they have little to no impact. They each work with their small niche, attracting a small following, and consequently are not able to push through changes effectively in the world system. I wonder what would happen if all of these organizations would select a common goal and work towards it simultaneously? I foresee that if that was to happen – the selected issue in the world system would receive a lot more attention – and the organizations with their combined financial assets would be able to make a significant impact.

Thus – we have not yet come to understand the power of unity and acting together. This is also clear for us people, when we act in our individual capacity. I am at the moment involved in a project where the government has given grants to restore a lake close to where I live. The project has been granted about 200 000 € and is receiving much attention from villagers in the vicinity to the lake. What has come through on the meetings that has been held is that many villagers are angry with the municipality. They feel that too little tax money are spent in their area of the commune – and that there are not enough commitment from ruling politicians. What I see is that this blame reveals that the villagers have not themselves done what they are able to for their local environment. Consider the fact that if 200 villagers joined together and each donated 1 000 €, which is bearable expense for most households, they would have enough finances to handle the project themselves without the help of the government. Unfortunately – we have not yet realized the power that we have in numbers, unity and a combined direction. When we do – many of the problems we currently have on earth will surely be able to be solved within a lifetime.

Equality and oneness – a principled direction – does not mean that we all have to do the same thing. Instead it involves bringing through the same expansive consideration for the whole in all that we take a part in. We can be active and participate in a small niche area and still include everyone else – and actively work on how our small niche area can interact/relate/cooperate with the rest of the world to contribute and bring through a supportive outcome for all.

It is about WHO WE ARE within what we do. An interest/group/direction can be used as a way to further our own desires and separate ourselves from everyone else or it can be used as a way to complement and support the whole. Every society is complex and requires specialists in a variety of subjects to function effectively – that does not mean that we cannot share the same principle – that we want what is best for ALL – and that we strive to reach there by using common sense. If all of us would unite in such a principle – this world would look very different.


Day 383: Structure – A Key to Freedom

Structure – the word I have been practicing in my life now for a while. I thought it would be a good idea to share some of my findings and insights when it comes to living structure.

Initially I related the word structure to schedules, almanacs etc., and did not view the word as particularly useful in any other context. I also felt that structure was something that limited my creative expression – and that it took away freedom. Thus I have had a bit of a conflictual relationship with the word. Similarly I have had to walk a process to be able to walk in this current money system without reacting towards it – and feeling like the stiff structure and routine of the system pulls me down into a state of too much structure.

At this stage however I feel comfortable with the word – and as I walked the process of understanding it and integrating it into my life – I have realized that structure is everywhere and that is supportive. I have seen that having a structure allows for self-directed creative freedom, while having complete creative freedom without a structure invites lack of direction, loss of overview/focus/movement; it becomes expression without a foundation – and in most cases the results are not good.

Let us take the example of cooking. If I start to cook without a structure – for example – I just haphazardly mix the ingredients and I decide to roast them all in the oven for the same duration of time – I will not be able to create an effective meal. Cooking is a perfect example of a physical expression that rests heavily on a structured foundation – the physics of taste/texture/nutrition – and yet – it is an expression that allows for a wide array of experimentation and creative freedom.

It is the same with music. If I am unfamiliar with the instrument or musical theory it is going to be very difficult for me to improvise or compose my own songs. And sure, I will have complete freedom to play the instrument in any way I desire, but what is the use of that if I am not able to create pieces of music that I enjoy? With a basic structure, knowledge of the instrument and the notes it can produce, it is going to be different. I can now create melodic music yet still be creative, explore and investigate what new sounds and expressions I am able to produce.

Thus, used rightly structure does not quell creativity – it instead supports and enhances it. However there has to be a balance. Too much structure will lead to rigidity. Structure is in its nature predefined, constant, and impermeable to whims of the moment. Though oftentimes it is those spontaneous outbursts that bring through the flavor, the individuality, the joy and pleasure. Thus structure in itself is not the aim – it is the means. It is a stable support from which I am able to move into new expressions and experiences – the ground that I am able to get back to when I have lost myself in the boundlessness of creative freedom.