Tag Archives: process

Day 451: Why I Persist

One thing that I have found in my process is that they key to self-change is found in the basics. And with the basics, I am referring to the basic tools of self-change presented by Desteni: Writing, self-forgiveness, self-commitments, breath and corrective application. These are the five most potent tools that exist for self-change. They might seem too simple, however, that is what makes them effective. These tools can be applied almost everywhere and at any time – and with them the depths of self can be explored in detail. This is the reason why I have continued to use these tools now for soon a decade. With them I can change and become what I see is BEST for all – and consequently best for ME.

Unfortunately, many who join Desteni and begin to use the tools, have a expectation to achieve noticeable results faster than what is possible. The Desteni process and the offered tools however is a long term process. It will not move fast due to the simple reason that real and substantial self-change takes a lot of time. It also takes much discipline and effort. And regrettably, process is mostly not what I would call fun – it is not entertaining – it is instead challenging. Thus to stick with process and use the tools for the time required to see lasting results, for me, that has required a clear goal. I have derived the contents of my goal from a remembrance of my years as a young child. During those years I experienced myself fulfilled and free – and since I became older – I have desired to go back to that state of innocence and self-confidence. I realized early on that by using the Desteni tools I would be able to remove the emotional/feeling clutter hindering me from yet again returning to that state. Thus one of my goals, and what has pushed me to continue and return to the basics, has been that I have wanted to return to innocence – and live a free and fulfilled life.

Another goal/vision that I have held within me and that have motivated me to stick with the tools has been my desire to have a world that is best for me, best for all, and my desire to be part of creating that new life. This desire to achieve a significant change is something that I have returned to when things have gotten tough. I do not want to settle for what works. I want what is best – and giving myself to the purpose of creating what is best brings me real satisfaction. Living a life where only I, alone, reap the benefits is for me empty and without substance. To only care about what success I am able to achieve, it does not mean anything to me. I prosper when I am able to feel that what I am doing is contributing to upgrading life, and that I do when I sit down to write, when I apply self-forgiveness, and when I implement my forgiveness through correcting myself in a real time moment. That is having DIRECT effect.

The big difference, when comparing the Desteni process to other tools/theories/processes for self-change available, is that the Desteni tools are practical and concrete. In spirituality, issues are many times given a abstract solution. For example, lets say that a person suffers from social anxiety. In spirituality, a solution given could be: ‘You need to open yourself up more to the love in others and not fear meeting the unknown’. Though here it becomes problematic when applying this solution in physical reality – because how do you practically live ‘opening yourself up’ – how do you practically ‘not fear meeting the unknown’?

Here the Desteni tools, when used properly, instead give a practically applicable solution. To deal with social anxiety the following solutions could be applied: Write about the fear, investigate how it was created and apply self-forgiveness on the memories/energies associated with interacting with others. Then, to change the fear practically, start looking into the eyes of others, walk with a straight back, push your chest outwards and your shoulders slightly back, and breathe deeply and practice relaxing your muscles when fears comes up in social situations and start talking/interacting with the people there. There is a clear difference between spiritual/soft solutions and the direct concrete solutions that can be realized by utilizing the Desteni tools. And I have experienced marked sense of self-empowerment each time that I have been able to solve my issues, not only mentally, but also change my practical reality by changing how I interact with it.

And these are some of the reasons as to why I have kept on using the tools of writing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective statements, and self-corrective application, why I have persisted and stuck with the Desteni process, throughout the years. It has been a way for me to make the best of my life – and I am convinced that these tools would be able to benefit everyone and assist and support in expanding LIFE and in realizing our full potential.


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Day 432: Success, It Is About Starting

Yesterday I read a great blog on the topic of success called A New Dimension of SUCCESS, in which a cool definition of success was brought forth:

Success lies not in how much you have accomplished, but in the fact that you have done something, experienced the process, and begun to learn something

This definition of success does not target material wealth, the result, rather it is about ACTING – and I find that empowering. I have many times feared walking into new ventures and directions, because I suspected I might not be able to make them successful and worth my effort, and due to this I have stopped myself from having new experiences. And I have also seen how I evaluate past projects on the basis of how much wealth I was able to produce, or time I was able to save, or how much attention I received from others, or how close to my initial goal that I came. The problem with evaluating my projects through such quantitative measurements is that I will miss MYSELF within all of them, and miss that, regardless of the outcome, I actually walked a process, I did something, and if I look closely, I will see that I learned something as well.

Defining success as the actual decision to DO something, that supports growth and movement, it supports courage and direction, it supports creativity and inventiveness – it is a EXPANSIVE definition – where the goal is the PROCESS, the JOURNEY, the DECISION, and not the actual outcome in itself.

However, there is something missing from the definition, and that is the point of OTHERS/EXISTENCE. Because, there is more to this life than myself, and real success is only real when everyone benefits. The principle of what is best for all is a essential component in success, for success to be substantial and worthwhile.

Thus – I would like to change the definition above to the following:

Success is the ACT of moving myself to accomplish a goal/direction/project that benefits/supports life in some way, and it is also my EXPERIENCE of the creation process, and it is what I LEARNED through doing it

With this redefinition of success, what is accentuated is the point of making sure that my direction/project/goal actually brings through some sort of value/support in life – if what I do is harmful/self-interested only based on what I want with no regard for another – its not SUCCESS. Further, with this redefinition, the process of creation is placed in the limelight – what is important thus is the MOVEMENT – to actually do something – to not let it remain on a idea level. Ideas/projects/potentials – they are meant to be EXPLORED and MOVED. Hence – if there is an idea – and I want to bring it through – then next point is to PLAN and then DO – it is as simple as that. And – regardless of the outcome – there will be things I have learned, an experience that I can take with me – and that is SUCCESS as well.

For those interested on further perspectives on SUCCESS I suggest listening to the following interviews:

Failure and Success – Reptilians – Part 571

More Dimensions of Failure and Success – Reptilians – Part 572

Practically Working with Failure and Success – Reptilians – Part 573


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Day 426: Planning/Structuring My Next Move

Creating a structure, a plan, a way to go, it takes time, it takes effort, and sometimes, it feels like its not worth it. Hell, why not just go for it immediately? At least, that has been the case for me. Well, I have now come to see things differently.

I am actually in the midst of removing rust from my car. It has not been a particularly difficult process, until that is, I got to the part where I have to varnish the car. Then things started to become complicated, because in order to have the reparation blend in with the old varnish, there are certain techniques that must be used. Unfortunately, I learned these techniques AFTER I had begun with my project, which again shows the importance of STRUCTURE and PLANNING. The natural progression in my case would have been that I first sat down to do research on the techniques of how to remove rust and the varnish the car effectively. And then to go out and apply it in reality. However, because I was so eager, excited, and also, a bit arrogant, I went out and into action without hesitation.

However, there have been more complications. In the middle of varnishing the car, I ran out of color. And now, I have two spots on the car where there is no varnish, and usually, it takes a couple of weeks for the color to arrive when ordered, and hence, I might have to abort mission in the middle of the process, and then return to it at a later stage to do it again. If, I would have prepared all the ingredients, all the tools, all the things I need, BEFORE, I started the project, and hence committed myself to following a STRUCTURE, I would not have this problem.

These are all examples of why structure is important, and also examples of situations where structure has not been applied sufficiently.

Thus – the solution – to SLOW DOWN – and BEFORE I begin the ACTION part of a project – to do my research – to prepare – to plan – to consider the application and movement to come – and THEN – to go into ACTION. And obviously – with some things, there is not much to be planned or considered, and with other things there are many points to contemplate, especially those that I am not familiar with.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist applying structure, because I feel that it is boring, there is no ACTION in it, I do not get anywhere, it is just discussing and planning, looking at the point, no MOVEMENT, and hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define action and movement as only being the part of a project where I DO something PHYSICALLY that has an immediate and direct impact on the point I am walking – not seeing, realizing and understanding, that a successful project, a successful application, has many other dimensions to it, that impact on a indirect level, such as for example an effective STRUCTURE, an effective PLAN

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to apply structure, consideration, planning in my life – to push myself to before I begin something, to plan and structure my actions, to while I am in the middle of a project, to push myself to structure and plan my actions, to not go wild into spontaneous action believing that this is the most effective route to go, because I see, realize and understand, that many times it is not – and in-fact – I will have to re-do the project – or I will end up dissatisfied with the results – because I have not applied myself to the level that I am capable of doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that even though creating a structure and a plan takes time, it will show in the final result, it will show in how I walk the point, because when I plan, when I use a structure, I am able to be more relaxed and confident, because I know where I am going, and I know where I am, and I am able to see as well when things do not progress as I see is best – and then act

Self commitment statements

When and as I see myself resisting to sit down and plan, structure and consider a project/movement/direction that I am intending to walk – I stop myself – I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that when I take the time to plan, structure and consider my movement, and prepare myself beforehand – I always end up with better results – I am more satisfied and more content with myself – and when I am done – I know the project has not been walked haphazardly – and hence – I commit myself to PLAN, STRUCTURE, PREPARE and CONSIDER my movement/direction/application within a project BEFORE I move into the ACTION-phase – to as such support myself to achieve the best results possible


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Day 396: Processing At Work

The office I find to be one of the most challenging environments within which to remember and apply the tools of process; breathing, self-forgiveness, self-corrective statements and self-corrective application. While at the office, I find it to be very, very easy to loose myself in a rushed state – and illusion of time constraints where I become convinced by my own belief that I literally do not have any time left whatsoever to be utilized for my process.

For example let us say that I have a reaction at work; anxiety comes up in relation to finishing a particular task that has been assigned to me. The common sense in such a moment would be to stop up, take a breath, look at this anxiety, apply a fitting line of self-forgiveness, find a corrective word to live, and then apply it, and continue walking. Having such a simple approach each time there is a reaction within me that I have difficulty to stop on the go would make A LOT of difference for me. However, because I have this illusion of hurry within me – I do not take those moments that would be so good for me to do.

An interesting point that I have noticed is that usually, there is time available at work to stop up and deal with inner experiences that open up. Though I have to use my time effectively. And here I have seen that while at work, there is a tendency to spend the time I do have available on things such as coffee breaks, long lunches, etc. – breaks that could be shortened where time would be released that I could instead utilize to apply the tools of process and move myself forward within myself in relation to what I am going through. Potentially, I could instead of using my lunch break to eat and then sit and talk about something that have no real meaning or depth to it, go and write in my journal for a moment, and outline my inner process for that day in words – which would also be really assisting and supportive for me to remain stable and efficient in dealing with what comes up within me.

Thus – I have realized that learning to apply process while participating in the normal everyday things and responsibilities of life holds the key of moving fast and efficiently through what comes up within me. I always have the tools with me, it is simply a matter of remembering them, and applying them, and then doing it over and over again until I have come through. Work is no excuse for not walking process, having many responsibilities is no excuse for not walking process, being a parent with young children is no excuse for not walking process – because process is ALWAYS here – it is simply a matter of making the decision to bring process HERE.

 


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Day 395: The Power of Writing

How to remain self-honest and walk process, how to not get distracted and lost in the entertainment offered within the system, how to keep one’s focus and chosen direction in life even though so much time goes into working, money, and other forms of responsibilities that must be handled in order to survive?

These are questions I have been looking at recently, because in acquiring a full time job, getting access to more money and a easier, more comfortable life, it is easy to forget what is important, it is easy to forget one’s purpose, and forgetting that, so many people in this world are without their basic necessities, living in unacceptable conditions, in a system that does not cater to the needs of everyone. What I have found as a solution to this problem is WRITING – the WRITTEN word – that has become my sanity and point of grounding. When everything spins fast, sitting down by my computer, and establishing the words I want to live and stand as within my life helps a lot. In writing, I am able to reaffirm my purpose, direction, movement – I am able to remind myself of what is crucial and what I want to do with myself – because with writing – I have a moment with myself where I am able to deliberately choose my WORDS – and my words become my WORLD.

If we take a look out in the world – we are constantly bombarded with words; advertisements, newspapers, television programs, books, music, conversations with other people – there is a on going soundboard of words entering our worlds daily. Hence – it is not strange that if we ourselves do not take responsibility to design ourselves according to the words we see are best – that we will slowly but surely loose focus – start to slip – forget – become led astray – because we begin to live and integrate words that others have put out into the world – instead of sticking with our own words – that we have decided upon because we see that they are best for us.

Because of this I have decided to put in some time to write most mornings before I leave for work – I use a pen and a paper and I allow it to take time required. However, with writing, I have found that it is not the amount written that matters, it is the principle, the direction, the clarity, the intent, the decisiveness in the words. I can write for an entire day – though if I am not self-honest – it will mean nothing at all. Same is true the other way around, I can write but one sentence, however with that sentence I can change my entire day – I can make a clear decision as to who I am going to be and live that day and then apply it – and through that make a directive and supportive movement in my life.

Hence – with writing – the power lies in writing words that MATTER – writing words that come from the HEART – and then – through writing – looking for and establishing solutions that can be lived PRACTICALLY – PHYSICALLY – HERE. It is through process of placing words that matter that I have been able to support myself to remain grounded and focused on my direction – and hence it is something that I would suggest for anyone interested in supporting themselves to make and create something more with their lives – a life lived from within and as principle – and not moved from thought to thought without any plan or goal.

 


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Day 390: Not Enough Time For Process?

What I have been looking at recently is how to make sure that I am walking and moving myself in my process even though there is not as much time for writing and self-introspection as there used to be. I have found that writing is a superb technique for giving myself a moment to stop, to look, and to establish a direction for myself. However, it is not possible to do this the same way anymore, and hence revolution is required, a new paradigm must be shaped.

One way in which I have been able to incorporate process in my daily living is through applying self-forgiveness out loud every time I am driving by myself. Another way in which I have been able to do it is through applying self-forgiveness within myself each time I have a reaction. The next step as I see it, to support myself to make process even more so, a natural part of my life, by practicing the IMMEDIATE CORRECTION after I have applied self-forgiveness.

Thus far I have experimented with LIVING WORDS as a correction after I have applied self-forgiveness, which is challenging and expansive. After I have had a reaction and applied self-forgiveness, I look within myself to see whether there is a word I am able to embody that would assist and support me to change and align my inner experience. Today when I woke up, within me there was a undefined angst, I forgave the experience and looked within, and here I could see the word COMPLETION. Hence – I immediately went into application living the correction – COMPLETION – which I lived through being completely in my body – each part – being complete in myself – hence allowing myself to see, realize and understand that there is nothing more I need and require to chase and achieve – I am complete in my MYSELF here – and this chase and hunt to achieve something more – it is not real.

Hence – even though my life has changed – even though things are different – and there is less time – it does not have to mean that there is less process. Rather – this is an opportunity for myself to push and will myself to really make process part of my entire life – and not accept and allow myself to walk and apply process in but parts of my life.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am able to apply and make process part of all my life – that only because I do not have time to write, or apply self-forgiveness out loud, it does not have to mean that I must hold back in my process of self-creation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to establish ways, methods, means of walking process HERE even though there is a time constraint – to see, realize and understand that this is a new challenge – where I will have to establish myself even though I cannot walk process the way I used to do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that using the excuse that I cannot walk process because there is not enough time is not valid – because the only that is needed to walk process is me – and I am here in every breath – and thus I can push and will myself to make and have process be part of my everyday life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that process is WHO I AM – that it is thus something that I can walk regardless of circumstances – and hence I push and commit myself to walk process in every moment – to walk process in every breath – to make it part of my every step – and to practice living words as an immediate correction in my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need things to complete me – that I need certain things to happen in the future to complete me – that I need a certain life to complete me – that I need a certain security to complete – and hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider and also to not live the word COMPLETION for and as myself – as something that I do to assist and support myself

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself waiting for process, or defining process as writing, or as applying self-forgiveness out loud, I take a breath and I bring myself back here, and I see, realize and understand that process is HERE – that process is my decision to walk and transcend my mind and change myself as who I am and birth myself as a trustworthy and life-supportive individual – that process is something that I can put into and have in my daily living as a constant point of consideration – where I push myself in every breath to apply and live words; hence I commit myself to each time I have a reaction – to take a moment to apply self-forgiveness – and then find a corrective word that I can live – and then live it

When and as I see that I am waiting to be completed by something outside of me, by a thing, or a person, or a activity, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that I will never be able to find and achieve that completion by taking someone or something outside of me into my life – rather completion is a decision – it is WHO I AM – and it is lived in every moment – as a decision to stand COMPLETE – to stand FINISHED – to not be separated into thoughts and experiences – but stand as one in the moment and be fully here; and thus I commit myself to practice the word COMPLETE – through bringing everything here – bringing it all back to myself into the moment – into and as my human physical body – and grounding my presence and awareness HERE


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Day 361: Experiencing Real Life Versus Walking Process

With process, I have noticed that it can be easy to create a rift between on the one hand walking process and on the other hand, enjoying and living a fulfilling life – where the belief that is created is that these two points are mutually exclusive. In the beginning of my process, this rift was more pronounced, however as I have continued to walk my process, what I have begun to do is to INTEGRATE my process into my DAILY LIVING.

What I have seen is the following: There are certain tools that must be used to walk process effectively, among these we find writing self to freedom, self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements. In that way, process is confined to certain physical positions and movements. We must either sit behind a computer or with pen and paper in order to write, and sounding self-forgiveness and self-corrective statements, that usually requires that we are in alone. Those are the only parts of process that are bound to a certain time and space – because the REAL CHANGE process – that is walked IN daily life.

Thus, it does not make sense to separate walking process from living within and participating in our daily routines, walking our hobbies, interacting with friends, traveling, exploring, and experiencing the various opportunities of expansion that exists within life. Process should be a part of life. What I have seen, realized and understood is that if there is a sense of resistance/discomfort towards process, and feeling in a way, trapped by challenge that process represents, then there is a separation between walking process and the rest of our life – and the solution thus is to integrate process into all parts of our life.

Integrating process into our lives is simple, yet it requires us to be aware, ready and present – and open to challenge ourselves and how we have decided to live. This way of looking at and approaching process can open up new worlds to explore. For example, going to work, such a menial point, mostly seen as something undesirable, can become a way to get to know self and expand. It is thus all about WHO WE ARE within what we do – not about what we do.

This also relates closely with the point of future obsession and how it can be easy to get stuck in projections of the future and loose touch with the present. In-fact, it is not that important what we decide to do, what is important is WHO WE ARE – what we decide to do and who we decide to be within ourselves. Process, self-creation, self-expansion, and moving beyond what we considered possible for ourselves can thus be a integral part of all areas of our lives – and that is also the solution to stop separation – to stop the constant experience of conflict and separation that other wise reigns within us as we try to reach and attain the most luscious pasture that we can graze.

Thus, walking process is never something that is easy. It requires effort, dedication, diligence and movement – HOWEVER – we do not have to limit process to only certain actions and parts of our lives. Rather, process should be HERE regardless of where we are at, with process meaning that we at any given moment strive to improve, further, drive, and move ourselves to become MORE, BETTER and reach our utmost POTENTIAL.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my future, my purpose, my direction very, very seriously, and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget about life HERE, and that it is never about what I do, it is about WHO I AM – and that I can do all the apparent right things yet never move an inch within myself – because I have not actually moved WITHIN myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not bring my attention/focus/direction back HERE to myself – and place my attention on WHO I AM – place my attention on self-development – self-creation – and self-expansion in every moment of breath – to look at my daily living and see the obvious points of expansion that I can take on and begin to push those

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that a consequence of placing attention on the future, of creating conflict in relation to the future, conflict in relation to what I should become, how I should be, how I will experience myself in the future, is that I will loose touch with the physical HERE – loose touch with what is important and significant – which is my daily movement and direction HERE

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will not be able to live an interesting and fulfilling life if I make process part of my daily living – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that this is an illusion that I have created, a belief that my life will become less if I decide to integrate process as part of my life – while this is not true – and in-fact – only an excuse and a justification for me not to live and create fully – completely – and with all of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the more I integrate process into my daily living – the more I expand – the more I am able to see – the more fulfilled and stable I become – and in-fact – I miss out on nothing at all – life thus is not supposed to be separated from process – because what is life without the drive and push to change and move self to become the best self possible?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will loose myself if I make process a part of my daily living – a part of my every moment application – not seeing, realizing and understand – that I will not loose anything – but rather CREATE a new SELF – that will be able to walk through and do something worthwhile with life – instead of going through the motions and then ending up not doing anything at all

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself having resistance towards process and applying myself because I rather want to get on with my life and just experience it, I take a breath and bring myself back here – I see, realize and understand that this separation between process and life is an illusion, something that I have created in the belief that there is something more to be experienced but myself HERE – and thus in a way trying to run away from myself – and thus I commit myself to make process part of my everyday life – through integrating process in my life in moments and in parts of my life where I see that I must expand/move/direct myself – and in the parts where I see that I am already strong – by enhancing those strengths even more – thus actively making process a part of myself and my life


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