Tag Archives: public speaking

Day 414: Public Speaking and Creativity

During last week I was away on a 3-day course. It was very intense, with scheduled activities from nine in the morning till ten o’clock at night. One of the lectures was about rhetoric and how to speak with a crowd to arouse interest and curiosity – and that was something I passionately enjoyed. I remembered how amused I was by the creative and expressive arts, such as theater, music and painting. Those expressions are part of my nature and activities I have to give myself space and time to indulge in – if I want to experience the full pallet of colors that is me. It was interesting, that I did not really notice how my own passion and enjoyment was coming through – until after the course, when I came back to work and one of the secretaries pointed it out to me.

What I enjoy about public speaking is that there is a nerve to it, there is a performance. The thing about performances is that you have to be fully present, and you have to dare yourself to step out of your comfort zone. It is not possible to hold back, because everything depends on you. If you do not open your mouth, move your body, or do whatever you have set out to do, there will be no performance – there will be no act. I also appreciate the freedom of expression that is available in public speaking. You are bound only be the limits that you have created. One and the same topic can be approached in a thousand different ways, and it can be delivered in as many ways as there are people on the planet. Our voice can be soft, stern, sleek, whispering, or, silent. Our body language can be engaged, held back, impressive or intense. There are so many ways to frame ourselves.

However I do see, realize and understand that I am not able to practice public speaking everyday and everywhere I go – though – I still want to experience and bring creativity, inspiration and enjoyment into my life. Thus – I see that I must apply and live these words everywhere – however in particular – when it comes to speaking and interacting with people. I tend to hold myself back and fall into self-created limitations when I interact with others. And it is these limitations that I want to break through – that is what pleasures me – when I move through fears and anxieties and allow myself to express creatively.

And it does not necessarily have to be speaking with people. Creativity can be applied and lived everywhere. It can be applied in for example, driving a different route to work, adding new and different spices when cooking, reading a new kind of book, about a topic that feels as distant as Pluto. I would say that the main component of creativity is to be open and excited about trying new things, seeing how it fares, and enjoying the process – and not accept and allow fear of failure, or fear of losing control to stifle. The process of creativity is a walk into the unknown – it is about venturing into undiscovered spaces – and maybe that is why so many have difficulty bringing in creativity into their lives? They fear the unknown, the uncontrollable, the opaque – however – that is the charm. Do we really want to live a life that is in all its facets calculated, exact, without surprises, without uncharted avenues, without any sense of adventure or opportunity for change and expansion?

And that is why I will strive to bring more creativity into my life at large and explore the various ways in which I can realize this word in my daily living. And even though I have a desktop job, and most of my day is spent sitting in an office, I am convinced that there is much still to be explored. Being creative is not something that can be made dependent on the environment – creativity in itself comes from within and is something we have to nurture and actively bring through into our life’s.

I will in the coming week explore this word – and report on my progress.


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Day 119: Filthy Weaknesses

weaknessWeaknesses – looking at my own current definition of weaknesses I see them as being something that is wrong and that should and must be fought, pinned down and destroyed. This approach of mine to the point of weaknesses is something that I have recently begun to take note of, and I have seen that it pretty much comes through in most dimensions and aspects of my life, living and process. I tend to zone in on what I perceive to be a weakness, judge the weakness, and then vehemently fight the weakness – which is a form of suppression because no actual self-change is taking place – obviously because I am to busy fighting that which I perceive to be a weakness within me.

This point opened today in regards to me becoming nervous, as I had to perform in the art of public speaking. What I saw is that I immediately as this nervousness came up within me, I judged it to be a weakness, and in that I began to fight it – I didn’t want it to be in me because apparently I should be past that point, I should be stable, and I should be able to comfortably and calmly do public speaking. When I noticed I couldn’t win the fight towards this nervousness, I instead went into a state of a more passive, failure and self-judgment mode – perceiving myself as a failure because I couldn’t stop remove this apparent weakness and speak the way I wanted to speak.

Thus – I am able to see that this relationship that I have created to the point of weaknesses isn’t assisting and supporting me, because fact is that I never go to the point of developing my weaknesses into strengths – I instead stop at that point of fighting the weakness, and feeling like a failure because I have that particular weakness – when I could instead utilize those moments to assist and support myself to transform the weakness into a strength and build myself to become more effective in my application.

Really, the entire idea within me that weaknesses are bad is thus off the mark – because weaknesses are merely weaknesses, they are nothing more and they are nothing less – and a weakness is mostly a point that can be corrected and directed into and as a strength – and a strength is neither more or less – it is merely a strength – something that I am good at and that I can do effectively and effortlessly.

To be effective in actually supporting myself to stand up and direct my weak spots I require to recognize them, understand them and allow myself to accept that they are here and that they won’t go away through my trying to fight them off – instead I will have to change them as myself – and this can not be done through a process of judgment – but must be done through a process of understanding – understanding how I have created the weakness, exactly how I have become this weakness – because in that I can correct myself to step out of the weakness and make it a strength.

Thus, today I am going to walk a self-forgiveness process in relation to my definition of the word weakness.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fight weaknesses and define weaknesses as shameful and embarrassing, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to spend my time judging, fighting and resisting my weakness instead of practically assisting and supporting myself to transcend and walk through my weakness, and develop my weaknesses into strengths

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that weaknesses are something that I should hide from myself and from others, because they are shameful and inherently bad, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I notice that I have weaknesses, instead of practically assisting and supporting myself to transcend and walk through them, judge them, fight them, and resist them, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that this is not a effective way of dealing with weaknesses, because common sense dictates that what I resist persist

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I see a weakness in my application it doesn’t mean that I am failure, and that I have done something bad, it merely means that there is a weakness in my application, and that it’s as such an opportunity for me to develop this weakness into and as a strength – as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see, realize and understand the opportunity of self-expansion that weaknesses presents to me – and that I could really change my relationship to weaknesses and have fun changing them – experimenting with them – designing solutions and working with how I am able to support myself to stand up and walk the weakness into and as a strength

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can’t change weaknesses and that the best I can do is to fight them, resist them, and suppress them, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the opportunity to be unconditional with myself, and to intimately explore all my flaws and mishaps – and in this place myself into a position wherein I am able to expand myself – because I know myself – I see what I am doing – and within that I see the solution as to how I am able to redesign myself and develop my weaknesses into and as strengths

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have an expectation upon myself that I should be without weaknesses – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into and as a state of conflict and resistance when I notice a weakness within me – and not want to recognize this weakness – but instead attempt and try to fight it off – and get it away from me so that I can be strong again – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that this is not an effective way to deal with weaknesses – because the reason there is a weakness is because I have not defined for myself an effective practical living – which is something that I am able to design with the use of words – and that I can investigate how I can assist and support myself to stand up and stabilize myself and walk myself from weakness into and as strengths

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect that I am to be without weaknesses – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that this is a unrealistic expectation, because it is quite obvious that I will have weaknesses due to how I have lived my life, wherein I have never actually paid attention to, and supported myself in corrected weak spots in my application, as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not let go of this expectation that I should be strong, that I shouldn’t have any flaws, that I shouldn’t have any weak spots, so that I can get to know myself unconditionally, and from thereon assist and support myself to stand up and develop my weaknesses into and as strengths

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself with others that I perceive to not have the weakness that I possess, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for having that particular weakness – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how I can’t compare myself with another – because I have not lived the life of another – I have not walked the processes of another – and thus it’s a point of ignorance to judge myself for not being effective in points that I perceive others to be effective within – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push myself to accept myself unconditionally – and accept and allow myself to recognize my weak spots – and within this accept and allow myself to unconditionally work with these weak spots and develop them into and as strengths

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I should be effective at everything that I am doing, and if I happen to have a weakness, and something that I am bad at, to think and believe that this is some form of mistake that shouldn’t be there, and that I must eradicate this mistake, fight it and resist it, and make sure that I ban it from my world – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be gentle in my approach to myself when I work with my weak spots – and in this making it enjoyable and fun to work with and develop my weaknesses into and as strengths

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to except that my weaknesses will go away when I judge them – and when I am hard on myself and complain within myself that I have a particular weakness – and within this I forgive myself that I that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that this is not a solution – because in complaining, judging, and being hard on myself, I am not actually assisting and supporting myself to find a solution, and to define for myself a way that I can practically walk this particular weakness into and as a strength – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not work with practically assisting and supporting myself to walk weak spots into and as points of strength – and doing this in a gentle manner wherein I am unconditionally accepting myself as I currently exist – and then I walk from this starting point – accepting and allowing myself to make the process of changing a weakness a point of self-exploration, self-enjoyment, and having fun with myself – wherein I am able to experiment with various different ways as to how I can practically support myself to change the particular weakness into and as a strength

Self-commitments

When and as I see that I am judging, resisting, and fighting a weakness that I see within myself, and in this attempt and try to suppress this weakness, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here to and as my human physical body, and I see, realize and understand that weaknesses aren’t anything bad or wrong, it’s merely points that I require to assist and support myself within and as, and that I am able to have fun changing, and directing; as such I commit myself to formulate practical solutions for myself to develop my weaknesses into and as strengths – and have fun and enjoy myself in the process of redesigning myself

When and as I see that I am being hard on myself for having a weakness, and I perceive that I am a failure, and inferior to others, due to this weakness, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here, and I see, realize and understand that a weakness is a weakness, nothing more or less, I am thus not a failure, I am thus not less than, I am thus not worthless – I simply require to change this weakness which I am able to have fun doing – as such I commit myself to assist and support myself to unconditionally uncover and explore my weak spots and from there formulate practical solutions so that I am able to change and redirect my weaknesses into and as strengths

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Day 34: Working With What Is Real

In the last blog – which you can read HERE – I took a part nervousness from the perspective of seeing what positive experiences I’ve connected to me for example standing in front of my class holding a presentation, or writing my exams – and the reason for this is to remove my idea(L) that I have of myself – as to who I believe/want to be – and instead get down to the nitty gritty of working with how I in-fact experience myself when it is that I stand before many people, or I do my exams.

Thus – today I am going to work my actual physical experience when I do exams, or hold a presentation – and I will also simultaneously walk the point of stopping conflict within me – in seeing that I don’t have to fight the real experience of me because it apparently doesn’t coincide with my idea-experience of myself as how I think I should experience myself – I mean – there is no need to fight what I already exist and live as – instead it’s to understand, and get to know the real me – and then place myself in a position wherein I am able to actually and for real correct myself.

NervousnessBlogSo – how do I really experience myself in these situations? Well – I become physically tense, and go into nervousness – which results in me not being able to effectively deal with the situation. One of the reasons for this is because I don’t know who to be – I don’t know how to look – I don’t know how to present myself – I have no real foundation so to speak. This is though something I’ve already worked with when I’ve prepared myself for my exams – I’ve actually structured a systematic structure as a way which I am to answer questions – and I this was effective to keep me more stable in the moment of writing my exams. For example – in my structure I stated that I must read slowly, and be focused on the words that are written on the question I am given – I must not jump, and stress through the initial stage of reading the question because then I will miss important information; and as I applied this on my exams – I was actually much more stable.

So – establishing a foundation – a MEness – that is important because that is something I currently lack – and I see that this will be done through writing out a structured way as to how to walk the point, who I am within in, and what specifically I am going to do – and then walking this physically.

A second prominent point that comes up is fear of the unknown – because I can’t really prepare myself completely when I am facing an event such as an exam, or a presentation – because there is always that small point of a uncertainty – a probability that something might go wrong, and that I then as this happen – won’t be prepared to deal with the consequences effectively.

Thus – another important point to establish is self-trust – because I see that in standing as self-trust – I will not fear the unknown as I will trust myself to direct myself through the point of the unknown and deal with any situation that might emerge.

Self-forgiveness

1. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown, and distrust myself in the face of the unknown – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to read a situation – and understand how a situation might respond to me – and what I must say, or do for the situation to respond to me in a way that I experience as being positive – so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can’t trust myself – and that when I trust myself something will go wrong, and I won’t be able to correct the mistakes that flows from this wrongness

2. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having information as to what will happen if I say, or do a certain thing – so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being blind so to speak, in not being able to calculate the consequences of my actions – and how others will see, and experience me – when it is that I act and live in particular ways – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, believe, and perceive that I require information, knowledge, and being able to calculate future consequences in order to be “safe” and trust myself

3. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that trusting myself is something that happens to me when I am able to know what is going to happen in the future – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to postpone me trusting myself, and prevent me from trusting myself in thinking and believing that I must have something more – I must get something more – I must achieve something more – and I must wait before someone give me a permission that I am able to trust myself – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not BREATH – be HERE – and to get myself moving within and as oneness and equality as my human physical body – and stop waiting for someone, or something else to save me before I trust myself here

4. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, and believe that I am not yet mature enough to trust myself – and that trusting myself is something that comes, and happens with age – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not let go of my fear, and my anxiety – and my worry, and my nervousness – and to see, realize, and understand that self-trust does not develop through waiting – but through me deciding, and willing myself to develop self-trust – through actually living and walking in such a way that I am able to trust that who I am is what is best for all – and that I will not compromise myself and fall prey to experiences, and illusions of and as the mind

5. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, perceive, and believe that I need, and require someone else to tell me that I am ready to trust myself – and that I am ready to go – so to speak – instead of accepting and allowing myself to say to myself that – hey! I am ready when I decide to be ready! And as such – I am able to decide here that I trust myself – and to stop fearing the unknown – to stop fearing trusting myself – and simply do it – and as such apply the statement of “just do it!” – because really that is what it all comes down to – to actually make the decision and walk the decision – and in-fact do it!

Self-commitment statements

1. When and as I feel, and experience that I can’t trust myself – because something will go wrong when I trust myself – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that – the fact is that what I experience is – a experience! Thus – a experience indicates that what is coming up within me is coming from the mind – automatically activated without my direct movement, and decision – and thus it’s not trustworthy; as such I commit myself to not trust the experience of myself that I can’t trust myself because something will go wrong – and I commit myself to act – and decide to trust myself here in this moment

2. When and as I see, and notice that I experience fear trusting myself – because I think that I can’t trust myself if I am not able to know the consequences of my actions beforehand – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that – I can decide to trust myself regardless of the situation that I am in – or the point that I am facing – simply because it’s about SELF-trust – and not about OTHER-trust – and thus I commit myself to decide to trust myself – and see that it’s only me that can decide and walk this point for myself here

3. When and as I see, and notice that I think, and experience that I must wait with trusting myself – because I must have something more, achieve something more, and get someone to allow me to trust myself – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that – it’s about me taking a decision and trusting myself – thus I can’t wait for my environment to change me – I must stand as the catalyst – I must stand as the start – and I must take the first step and not allow myself to wait anymore; as such I commit myself to practice trusting myself as a self-decision in the moment – that I walk regardless of what it is that I am facing here in this moment

4. When it is that I see I go into and as a belief that I can’t trust myself because I am not yet mature enough, and that I can’t direct myself to trust myself because this is something that happens with time, and as I grow older – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that – I mean – to believe that I will be able to trust myself more with time is simply an illusion – because look at most old people –they’ve also no self-trust and they’ve walked an entire lifetime in this world; as such I commit myself to stop using this excuse – to bring myself back here – and to see that I have to decide to trust myself – I have to stop waiting – and I have to actually do it because no one will do it for me

5. When and as I see that I am waiting to trust myself, because I feel that I have to have someone that tells me that – “okay, now you can trust yourself!” – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that this point of deciding to trust myself is something that I must give to myself, and nobody will say to me ever that “now I can trust myself” and even if they do – the decision is still MINE because there is only ME inside of ME – thus only ME that can decide who I am – and what I will live, and stand as; as such I commit myself to make the decision to trust myself HERE and without waiting and postponing

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Day 33: Nervousness Dissected

Today I am going to continue to investigate my positive experiences in relation to points that I become nervous in relation towards – the reason being that – when holding unto a positive experience and projecting this unto a particular point in one’s world, the consequence will be a equal polarity opposite of a negative experience – and here this experience is nervousness.

I suggest for anyone that desire to take on this point for themselves to invest in these interviews – well worth the money!

https://eqafe.com/p/deconstructing-nervousness-atlanteans-part-89
https://eqafe.com/p/overcoming-nervousness-atlanteans-part-90
https://eqafe.com/p/overcoming-nervousness-part-2-atlanteans-part-91
https://eqafe.com/p/sounding-self-forgiveness-for-nervousness-atlanteans-part-92
https://eqafe.com/p/finalising-nervousness-support-atlanteans-part-93

public-speaking-fearThus – let’s see – how is it that I view myself in relation to doing my exams, and speaking in front of people? As these are two points within which nervousness arise.

1) I am able to see that I experience a sense of false calm – I feel within me that “I am good at these kinds of things – and there is no way that I can fail” – so it’s form of superiority wherein I blow myself up within myself – thinking that this experience is me – while really – my actual physical experience while really walking the point of the exams, or speaking in-front of my class – is something completely different than calm, and boastful.

2) I feel that there is a sense of hope, and excitement in relation to this point – I experience it as if I’ve a opportunity to prove myself, and go somewhere new in my life, and reality – and within this I tend to have a sort of confidence within me – wherein I state that “I can do this!” – a confidence that then fails to shows up when it is that I am actually performing the point.

3) There is a expectation within me – as a desire to perform, and show everyone that “I can do it!” – “I can be the best on this point!” – “I can really make others notice me!” – thus it’s a desire to have attention, and to be seen – and also to be courageous, self-independent, and assertive.

So – these are the positive points that I’ve attached to the promise of walking exams, or speaking in-front of a group – what I am doing here is that I am removing the illusory part of my experience as the positive so that I am able to amalgamate myself, and merge with my real experience of me while doing my exams, and public speaking assignments – because within doing that I will place myself in a position of being able to direct reality, and change myself for real.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as being a superior to orator, a superior people’s person – and in relation to doing public speaking, or walking my exams – go into and as a state of positive excitement – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create positive ideas of myself in relation to walking in pressure situations, and doing public speaking – instead of accepting and allowing myself to be honest with myself in seeing that I do not actually feel, and experience myself positive while walking these events – and that my idea of myself in my mind – as how I’d like to be – is not in-fact how it is that I exist within and as myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate within and as, and create an idea of myself as being able to be calm, directive, and effective when walking tests in school, and when doing public speaking assignments – so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to approach situations with this false idea, and experience myself – and then go into panic, and self-judgment when it is that this idea, and false experience of myself as I do perform the public speaking, or the exam – immediately disappear and is replaced by nervousness in it’s nth degree

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that it’s ludicrous to think that the idea, and experience that the mind presents within me – as to how I would apparently experience myself while walking a test, and walking a exam – is real, is valid – and would be my actual physical experience of myself while walking the point for real – and so within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not bring myself back to the physical here – and work with, and walk with that which is real – that which is physical – that which is actual – that which is here and that I am able to see is here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust my mind more than what is here – more than common sense – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to as I hear about, and realize that there is a exam, or public speaking event coming up – to go into excitement, imagining how effective I’ll be in the point – and how well I will walk the point – creating a entire alternative reality within myself – where it is that I am not HERE – and I am not working with, and walking with and as reality – as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not bring myself back here to the physical – back to breath and instead of creating an experience of myself – to remain physical – remain as breath – remain as walking here in each and every moment and as such stand within and as – and be present here with and as reality and end all the delusion of the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that just because I experience myself as positive towards a particular upcoming event – wherein I will face the point of the unknown – to believe that this is, and will be my actual physical experience of myself while facing, and walking the point of the unknown – and as such – and within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I can’t trust my mind – that even though the mind presents a pretty picture to me – and happy, positive experiences – that this can’t in anyway show to me what is real – what is actual – and what trustworthy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not bring myself back to what is real – and to as such not participate in any form of experience in relation to walking the point of facing the unknown – to as such not create any point of conflict within me – and to not create any bubbles within me as an idea of myself that must be burst

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that it’s obvious common sense that simply because I experience a point as being positive – doesn’t mean that the actuality of the point is positive – and as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stop any expectations, and experiences within myself in relation to facing the unknown – and instead walk with and direct myself in oneness and equality here as I face the unknown – to as such not create any ideas, and experience of facing the unknown – but walking the point directly – physically – here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create, and formulate and idea of myself as who I am in relation to me facing a point that is unknown – is thinking that I would be strong, I would be steadfast – and I would simply walk through the point without any fear – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not deal with, and work with reality – because the reality of the situation is that when I face the unknown I become nervous, fearful, and experience anxiety – and I feel inferiority – as such this is what I must work with – not create more illusions within my mind – trying to create, and formulate a picture, fantasy, idea of myself – I mean what is the use of that? I need to work with myself – and I need to correct myself and I can only do that through being here in reality – and moving without judgment with and as that, which is actually here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that when I create a ideal me – as an idea of myself as who I want to be in my mind – I am going to create, and manifest a conflict within me – wherein the conflict will be me thinking that I am the ideal me – and being in conflict with the reality of who I am – as my physical and actual experience of myself in every moment of breath – as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stop creating ideal perceptions of myself in my mind – and instead commit myself to stick with reality – to stick with breath – to realize that thought can’t be trusted and that I must remain present and aware in every moment in order to be able to not fuck myself in my mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in conflict with myself – wherein I think that I should be fearless, and I should be assertive when I face the unknown – yet when I do face the unknown I go into nervousness, and fear – and in my mind I can’t comprehend, and understand this when it is that I’ve this belief in my mind saying that I should be assertive, and fearless – and so within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to learn the simple lesson, and to understand the simple point that – the mind can’t be trusted – the mind isn’t real – that mind is not physical it’s simply a interdimensional system that works by laws, and considerations that are not physical in nature – as such it’s simply ludicrous to consider the mind when moving myself in and as this physical reality – by the physical laws that this world, and reality consist of and as

Self –commitment statements

When it is that I see I am participating in an experience, and idea of myself as being effective, and strong, fearless, and assertive when it is that I am walking in a pressure situation – facing the unknown – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that – I can’t trust the mind reality – and obviously the mind reality as what I imagine in my mind me to be is not real – thus I am polarizing myself through separating myself from the real experience of me through creating a alternate reality of the false ideal experience of me; as such I commit myself to stop this alternate reality – and instead face the real, and actual truth of me – and correct, and re-align this truth of and as me

When it is that I am going into and as my idea of myself as being effective, as being fearless – and I go into and as excitement, and a state of superiority as feeling that – I am going to face, and walk through and completely ace this particular assignment, or exam – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that my experience of myself leading up to the exam – is not real – it’s a idea – a inflated ego idea that I have of myself that is only serving to through friction generate further negative experiences of myself in relation to facing myself in a pressure situation – facing the unknown; as such I commit myself to not participate in any experience of who, and what I am going to be in a moment of walking my exams, or doing public speaking – but to remain present – here – equal and one with and as my human physical body

When it is that I see I am going into a particular experience of myself – as feeling positive, and feeling invulnerable and is if I am able to do anything what-so-ever without anyone being able to stop – in relation to me doing my exams, or doing public speaking in school – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that whatever I feel – it’s not real – whatever I think – it’s not real – what is real is here with and my human physical body – and thus I must deal with – transcend – and move through reality – and correct what is actually here before I am able to in-fact express myself as a effective human being here within and as the physical as breath

When and as I see that I am going into my mind – using my mind to think about future events and who, what, and how I am going to live, and participate within and as these events – and I within this feel superior, excited, and more than – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that regardless of what occurs in my mind – regardless of how real it looks, or feels, or regardless of how much it speaks to me – it’s not real – it’s an idea in my mind proven by the fact that I can’t live the point physically here; as such I commit myself to bring myself back HERE – and to live physically HERE – to stand physically HERE – and to as such not be possessed or controlled – or in anyway defined by and as my mind

When it is that I see I am using my mind to discern – understand – and comprehend reality – I immediately stop myself – I take a breath, and bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I must by now have proven to myself – that the mind can’t be trusted – the mind is a fantasy machine and nothing more – as such I commit myself to practice in all ways always walk in practical reality as breath here – and not give into the temptations of the mind

I commit myself to walk with reality – and to deal with my actual physical experience, and expression of myself while facing the unknown – facing a pressure situation – and as such align myself with the physical instead of being caught in my mind as experience

When it is that I think, and believe that a positive experience – implies a positive reality – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that simply because a experience is positive – does not give me confirmation in anyway that reality is positive – and that the actual point is sorted and walked through – I mean it’s obvious common sense that the mind as a fantasy machine is not in touch with reality – and doesn’t function in such a way that it is to show me what is reality; as such I commit myself to not trust that a positive experience describes the state of a point – a positive experience is merely a positive experience – nothing more, and nothing less

When it is that I see I am creating an idea within myself, and a experience – that I would be strong, steadfast, assertive, and effective in walking through a uncertain point – a point wherein I would face the unknown – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I can’t trust what goes on within me as my mind – and regardless – what I am doing in my mind instead of simply walking through the point here? I mean – will I be able to walk through the point more effectively through being in my mind more? No – obviously not – and as such I commit myself to stick with reality – to make this my MAIN priority – to be here in every moment and not let my mind take me on joy ride into the fantasies of self-interest that exist within my mind

When it is that I am creating a ideal me, and I see that I am within this polarizing myself in relation to reality – creating on the one hand an idea of myself as an ideal me – and on the other hand suppressing the real me – as the actual physical experience of me – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that creating, and forming these types of relationships in my mind results only in that I do not change the actual me – because I am busy believing that I am the fantasy ideal me that I can see in my mind – while that is not in-fact so; as such I commit myself to apply, and perfect the simple point of being HERE in reality – of breathing here – and working with what is here – it’s that simple

When and as I see that I go into a experience within my mind – thinking that I should be fearless, strong, without hesitation, and assertive – when I face the unknown as doing an exam, or walking public speaking – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I can’t trust – and I can’t align myself with this fantasy – because as I can see when I do in-fact walk a point of the unknown – this mind-experience is not in-fact real – and it’s not me that I am seeing in my mind only a projection as a hope; as such I commit myself to remove any and all mind-delusions as experiences of who I think that I am – and instead I commit myself to live here – and be the best that I can possibly be in every moment of breath – to as such from the mind and into reality

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