Tag Archives: solution

Day 393: Talking Back

In my experience, one of the more destructive patterns in a relationship is the desire/urge to TALK BACK when feeling mistreated/hurt/diminished/unjustly treated. It is a problem to talk back in such instances because I am not entirely stable – and hence my words will be smudged with energy – some of them will not make sense – and they will result in a counterattack from the opposite side. For me, it is has felt like talking back is something that happens automatically, it is something that I really cannot help, or something that I just have to do in order to make sure that I protect myself effectively. These are the justifications that I have used to accept and allow talking back – because really – talking back is a very obvious phenomenon – with clear consequences – it is easy to see when I am talking back and all that would be required is to STOP.

However, I found that even though the pattern of talking back is obvious, it is difficult to stop, and the main reason for this I have found is COMPETITION – I do not want to lose! I do not want to be the one that falls flat on the ground. The problem as such is not talking back in itself – the problem is that I am competing and believe that the words of the other person has real impact, real weight, real power over me and my value as a person, and that I have to ‘strike back’ in order to make sure that the field is equalized and that I am not fighting from a position of inferiority.

Thus – a solution in these moments when I experience an urge to talk back it to remind myself that there is NO competition – the idea that there is a competition only exists in my mind – and as such – I do not have to shape my life around this misconception. I do not have to defend and protect myself when it comes the words others use – it is most definitely an illusion that there would be such a need. And hence – instead of talking back – I can breath – ground myself in my physical – and VOICE myself. And the focus of my VOICING would be to remain stable and calm – and to stick with common sense and with what I see is best – and not for a moment accept and allow myself to fall into the quagmire of competition.

And let us say that I fall and notice that I begin to talk back –  here I still have an opportunity to stop – I still have an opportunity to ground myself – to remind myself that it is about MYSELF and that talking back is completely meaningless – because – what I am I trying to accomplish? If I now manage to win this illusory competition – will I get a price? Hardly. Will I feel better about myself? No, because there will still be a on-going conflict between me and the other person. Hence – if I want to WIN for REAL – the solution would be to stick with my stability – stick with my common sense – remain stable – and VOICE myself – standing as an example in that moment of dealing with a conflict situation in a mature way.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to protect myself in situations of conflict – to believe that I have to defend myself and push the other person away in situations of conflict – to believe that I have to use words to convince myself and the other person that I am not losing – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not remain stable – breathing – understanding that words cannot bring me down

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to talk back trying to win in a illusory competition in my mind – where I think that the words of another can diminish and dis-empower me and that I hence need to be prepared and ready to fend of any attacks and injustices with voicing myself loudly – and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that in fending of – that in fighting – that in trying to win and protect myself – I am entirely missing the point of finding and establishing a solution – and obviously that is where my attention should be at – what is the solution in this conflict? What is the direction ahead? How can we move forward in order to create a sustainable solution that is best for all? Those are the questions that should be asked within me – and answered in how I voice myself in that moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not place my attention and focus on SOLUTIONS – what is the SOLUTION? How can I move forward? And hence – deliberately and actively move myself away from thinking that I am in a competition and that I need to fight – to will myself to win – to defeat all competition – and to understand within this – that the solution is to make sure that I am stable and that I look at what is best for all and do not lose myself in self-interest

Self-commitment statements

When and as I am in a conflict-situation and I want to talk back, or I have already begun to talk back, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here, and I see, realize and understand that talking back will not solve anything, talking back will not protect me, talking back will not give me anything, talking back will not produce anything of value in my life – rather – in order to have value within me and my life – I require to remain grounded and speak COMMON SENSE – speak what I see is best for all – FOCUS on solutions – and understand that words cannot harm or hurt me – and hence I COMMIT myself to VOICE myself – to share solutions of common sense – and to stick with my stability – and to STOP speaking if I notice that I am talking back – and then remove myself – and stabilize myself – and then return to the topic at a later stage – if necessary – within stability

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Day 349: Taking Care of Plants

A while ago I decided to take some potted plants to my office in order to make my working environment more comfortable and supportive. However, now, one of my plants have almost died due to dehydration and the other has been affected by dehydration – because I did not water them properly. Knowing that my external environment shows me who I am within, I decided to look at what I can learn about myself from this.

The word that popped up within me was nourish. I could see that the plants died because they did not get the proper nourishment, water. And it is not that I do not care about the plants, because I do, the problem is that when I am at the office, I usually get so caught up in a high strung energy of fast and efficient movement, that I get tunnel visioned and only see my work, and what task that I should get to next, and I do not take in my environment as a whole. Interestingly enough, I did not initially see that my plants experienced a tough time, as I was so completely invested into my work.

Obviously, this is not cool, and it is something that I want to change. I would want to be stable and have oversight, be calm and capable of nourishing myself and my environment, regardless of whether I am at work, or being at home relaxing. Instead of existing in a tunnel vision, I would want to have a expansive awareness of all the various lives that touch mine on a daily basis, so that I am able to support, nourish, and give as I would like to receive.

The solution is to ground myself using breath, and then deliberately expand my awareness through looking at and noticing what is going on around me – and then deliberately push myself to give time and attention to the lives around me – because another problem is that I will sometimes notice someone or something – yet not feel that I have the time to invest myself in their lives as I am so much into my own thing.

Thus slowing down and expanding my awareness to what is around me and pushing myself to invest time and effort into the lives that touch mine – to actively participate and give support and nourish – and see, realize and understand that it is not that I do not have time in-fact – it is that I am too fearful of losing time that makes me unable to effectively give as I would like to receive.


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Day 310: Reinventing The Wheel

Ever heard of the expression ‘There is no need to reinvent the wheel!’. For those that have not, this expression implies that it is completely unnecessary to come up with ‘your own way’ of approaching and directing a specific point if a solution has already been found – thus also implying that there is no value in coming up within things yourself – the value is instead in the solution itself and the practical outflows that comes from applying that solution.

I want to write a blog about this point because it has recently opened up in relation to my job. Basically, this is what happened: I had been given a task to write a piece on a specific topic. I sat down and started to sketch out how I would approach the point, only to realize that, there were some things off with the topic. I began making my own inquiries, and sat for some hours doing research. After a while I was satisfied, and also proud over myself that I had found that answers I was looking for. In my mind I imagined myself receiving some sort of praise or recognition from my superiors.

Later during the day I approached my boss and showed him what I had been working on. To my surprise he said; ‘Oh yes, that kind of problem, we deal with it like this, you can do the same here’ – whereupon he showed me an existing template of how the problem could be directed. I experienced a sense of disappointment, because I had hoped that my efforts would be rewarded with praise and attention, and now, it seemed that all my work had been in vain. This led me to ask myself the following questions: ‘Why did I not ask for someone’s perspective before I started to dig into this work?’ – ‘How can I avoid repeating this mistake in the future?’ – ‘How come it is that I place receiving attention and praise as a priority over practically getting things done in ways already tested and trialed?’.

In looking at this point I realized that the reason as to why I wanted to reinvent the wheel was because it would make me special, unique, and more in the eyes of others – through it I would be able to differentiate myself as more than. Though, the consequence of this was that I put in several hours into something that was not required, because the wheel was already invented, I could just have asked, and then solved the task within a matter of minutes.

Hence, this stands as a fitting example as to why wanting to be special, unique, new and the first is a limitation – because in that we are not working with COMMON SENSE – but trying to realize a dream/feeling/hope. And this feeling of being special, it is not even real, because physical creation is but that – it is a physical practical creation – and who created what or when – that does not matter to physical creation. For example, does it matter to a house or those living in the house, that the carpenter who built that house came up with and applied a new idea? Most likely no. And further, being special limits us from copying and using what is good and effective in the way others live their life’s – because we do not want to be a copycat. Though, what is wrong with being a copy cat when what is copied works and is of benefit to everyone?

Instead of wanting to be special, what should be the primary focus is to be of utmost value to ourselves and others in our life – and to be that it is not required for us to be unique – however we do need effective living techniques and in the process of establish such we can learn a lot from others. Hence, the solution that I see for myself when it comes to my job is to develop communication, openness, and also, completely let go of the desire to be special, and replace it with the desire to be effective/of benefit to myself and others. To instead of striving to be recognized, strive to do the best work that I can do.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be special instead of equal with others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be more than others and be recognized as special – and in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to miss out on myself – where instead of my focus and direction being to create what is best for all – to be of benefit and support to others in my life – my direction becomes about wanting and desiring recognition

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want and desire recognition – and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself and my physical reality in order to achieve recognition

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not practice self-recognition – in the sense that I recognize myself as being of value and a asset to others and myself – and push myself to stand as such a force in my life – where the purpose of myself and my future as such is not to become someone in the eyes of others – but instead to become a trustworthy companion that is able to walk this physical reality and give and share what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to invent something unique and out of this world – to want to do something nobody has ever done before so that I can feel special and good about myself in what I am doing – and hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let this desire take the drive within me – and want it to push and drive me through my life – in the belief that I require and need this something – to make a mark in my life – to have done something with my life.

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself doing something because I want to be special – something that is not really practical or necessary and where I am trying to reinvent the wheel – I stop myself – I take a breath – and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that in wanting to be special and get recognition I am compromising my effectiveness and my ability to contribute and give to others what is best – and hence I see that there is no practical value in being special – there is no practical value in being unique – and this physical reality does not care about who does what – and hence I commit myself instead practice being of value to myself and others in my world through practical living – where I push myself to take actions that make sense and have results – instead of taking actions in hope of being special.

I commit myself to practice the word simplicity – to embrace simplicity in my life – to embrace simplicity as myself – to see, realize and understand that I do not need to be special in my life – that I do not need to be someone or something to others – that all I need is equality – is to embrace and push me to stand as an equal participant – in that live value – live equality – live contribution – to push myself to be a giving participant that makes a difference through practical – basic – daily actions

Day 299: Anxiety and Fear When I Am In The Center of Everyone’s Attention

Today a situation played out at work where I for a moment was in the center of everyone’s attention. This brought a emotion of feeling uncertainty, insecurity, and anxiety – because when I am in the center of attention – I have this tendency to think about how I am perceived and seen by others.

I have written about this point before, and also been able to change and direct this experience during a couple of instances, and now I fell, which was a bit disappointing to me. As the point was playing out, I did have a vague inner voice saying that I can correct my experience by placing my attention and focus on breath, and also apply self-forgiveness. However, that inner vague voice never materialized, as I did not act on it. And afterwards, I was sitting with this experience in myself; why did I not change, or direct this experience within me?

Hence, in this blog I am going to work with this experience further, and also clarify a couple of points to myself, and also for you, the reader as well. Firstly, what defines me is not the fall in itself, rather it is WHO I AM after the fall, and what actions I decide to walk to support myself to transcend and learn to direct the experience. Thus, in this case, I am sitting down to write out the experience, investigate it, learn from it, and eventually learn to direct it.

Secondly, I can either look at a fall as something to resent, OR, I can use a fall to my advantage – and utilize it to expand myself in my process of self-creation. This is what I am doing here through writing this blog, I am standing up within myself, saying to myself, that this experience and way of interacting with other people is not something that I wish to have as a part of my character – instead I want to be able to be in the center of attention and remain STABLE, CALM, SELF-DIRECTED, in SELF-CERTAINTY and SELF-CONFIDENCE, and be RELAXED and at EASE in my physical body. That is the vision I see for myself, and what I want to establish in my life when it comes to social interactions, and when it comes to being in the center of attention.

That being established, lets look at the specifics of this moment particular moment. I can see that the origin point, the underlying issue is in-fact self-judgment. This self-judgment is then projected unto others and takes shape in backchat such as; “What do others think about me?” – “What do others see in me?” – “Do others like me or not?” – and so forth. It also takes the shape of uncertainty, because in judging myself, I am trying to be something or someone that I hope can be accepted by another, and looking at it more deeply, actually accepted by myself.

I can see this judgment towards myself coming up when it comes to establishing relationships with others. Because, when it comes to for example, deciding to meet another, and that person does not immediately show up on time; I will have backchat come up that this person does not like me, that I have done something wrong, that I have not acted properly, that they have in some way decided to push me out of their lives because they are not content with me. Hence, this shows that on a deep level within me, I do not see or recognize my own value, I do not accept myself as being valuable. And that is why I feel so happy and positive when people seem to take a liking to me, because in my twisted self-image, I do no see myself as worthy of such a relationship.

What is the solution?

It is quite simple; practice self-acceptance and valuing myself – RECOGNIZING and SEEING the value in myself. Giving myself recognition for my strengths, skills, and abilities, and for the integrity that I have developed throughout this process. There is much more to me than I admit, a unassailable value that I have not allowed myself to embrace and stand with – as I have seen myself as flawed and imperfect. That is what must change.

So, a solution can be, that when I notice this anxiety, stress and uncertainty come up within me – that I state within myself my qualities for which I am genuinely proud – such as: Discipline, Integrity, Openness, Loyal, Curious, Investigative, Questioning, Expressive, Spontaneous, Specific, Focused, Detailed, and Structured – these are qualities that I see and recognize in myself and for which I value myself.

And thus – it is a matter of continuously stopping this self-abuse of focusing on my flaws and weaknesses, and also seeing my positive and strong sides. And then also, to accept my bad sides, to not try to hide or suppress the fact that I do have weaknesses, but to accept and embrace the entirety of me. Because suppression does not work, and real self-change cannot take place unless I allow myself to SEE what it is within me that is required to be changed and directed.

Day 264: Fear of Missing the Train

When I have now become a regular commuter, I have come to notice a fear of missing the train. Now this fear is interesting to observe, because it is a cool example of the irrational nature of fears. Even though I am mostly 10 to 15 minutes early, I will still have a urgency, and fear that I must get on the train as fast as possible, because apparently it will potentially leave before I have boarded. I have had this fear as far back as I can remember, and it is not only with trains, I have fears of being late to meetings, and other type of appointments as well – and because of that I am usually earlier than everyone else.

Looking more deeply into this fear, I see that the fear of being too late hides a fear of the unpredictable, because what does it represent to miss an appointed time? Usually what follows is something unpredictable, or maybe a conflict, at least, it is not something that I am able to foresee. Looking even deeper, this fear of the unpredictable also reveals still another layer: Lack of self-trust. Because why would it be that I fear the unpredictable? Due to me believing that I am not able to handle that situation, believing that I need to be prepared and already have all the information in order to effectively direct my life.

This latest point that I mentioned is also fascinating to look into, because this is a problem that I have had with regards to bigger decisions in my life. I have been fearful, and indecisive when it comes to making decision, simply because I am not sure on how it is going to play out, what is going to happen – thus – facing the unknown/the unpredictable/that which I am not able to prepare for.

My fear of missing train as such really links back to a fear of the unpredictable/fear of the unknown. This goes to show how our day-to-day lives, and our small fears of everyday things can show us something a lot more meaningful about ourselves. The solution that I see to this point is to develop a self-trust in myself even in the face of the unknown – and to when this fear of the unknown/unpredictable comes up within me – to then say to myself that no – I will not accept and allow myself to fear the unknown – I will trust myself to walk into the unknown and direct myself within it effectively – or at least allow myself to make the mistakes, learn from them, and become effective in directing and moving myself in the unknown.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the unknown

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that which I am not able to predict, or control, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself to direct myself in that which is unknown, and unchartered to me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not develop self-trust in directing myself in that which us unknown, and unchartered territory for me – and hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to utilize fear as a coping mechanism for me to not have to face the unknown and that which I am not able to control, direct, or foresee

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the only way I can become better at directing myself in the unpredictable and unknown – is through trusting myself to walk into it – and when I am in it – push myself to be stable here – and look for solutions – establish a direction for myself that is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear missing my train, and become stressed, and anxious as I am going to my train, because I fear that I might miss it, and fear what might come out of that, and that I cannot control and exactly know the consequences of me missing my train, and how I am going to deal with this, if it happens in my life – hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into, and exist within and as a state of fear, and anxiety, and worry, where I believe that I will be better off, by hiding in these experiences, instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that the only way to really grow is to put myself into the deep end of the pool – and learn to swim

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not dare myself to be more comfortable with taking the train, and with not being so early to the train, realizing that I can give myself some moments, and that there is still urgency for me to go to the train, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not actively stop these thoughts of fear of missing my train

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that when this fear of missing my train comes up, to see that what I really fear is loosing control, and not having full direction on my life and where it is that I am going – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear giving up control, and fear ending up in a situation and position where I can’t predict what will happen next – and hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become dependent upon predictability for me to be able to trust myself – and see what my next step will be – and where it is that I am going next

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not capable of handling the unknown, and the unpredictable, and hence I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distrust myself, and hold myself back in this distrust, and try to cope with this distrust through fear, and worry – where I believe that if I fear and worry – I will protect myself from consequential outflows and more effectively be able to make decisions in my life that are right and will lead me to the best outflow possible

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rely on fear and worry to apparently protect me – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that fear and worry only makes me less capable of analyzing, and guiding myself through a moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I do not need to know exactly what is going to happen in the future for me to be able to see what the best direction for me is, and how to best deal with the situation that I am in – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not practice remaining stable and grounded here when I am faced with a moment where I don’t have control and overview – and where I am not sure what is going to happen and where my decisions will lead me

Self-commitment statements

When and as I see myself going into fear, and worry, because I am faced with a moment where I don’t have control, and the future is unpredictable, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that even though I might not specifically now where to go from here, and what is going to happen, this doesn’t have to destabilize and make me less effective, because I decide who I am – and I decide how to deal with moments that come my way – and hence I commit myself to stabilize myself using my breath – and practice remaining grounded and walking into my future even though I am not sure on what is going to happen

When and as I see myself distrusting myself, and using fear, and worry to apparently prepare myself, and make myself alert to deal with a unpredictable future, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize and understand that I don’t need, nor do I require fear and worry to be effective in my life – and to stabilize myself to make effective decisions when I am not clear on the direction in my life – and hence I commit myself to stabilize myself – and move myself from moment to moment – to look for a solution and a direction in every moment – and trust myself that I will find a solution if I continue to push and do not accept and allow myself to give up

Day 262: Finding a Solution

a puzzle piece made of grassWhen I turn on the television and look at the conventional newscasts that are aired every night, most often what will be shared is problems. There are problems with schools, problems with politicians, problems with money, problems with crime, problems with jobs, problems with immigrants. Seemingly millions of problems, yet, what is very, very rare is the sharing of a solution. Why is that?

To answer this question, let us take a look at our own lives, and how we approach difficulties, issues, conflicts, and other tough points that arise in our day-to-day living. Because where is our focus? We look at the problem – and over, and over again we regurgitate in our minds how big our problems are. And what we many times miss is to actively look for the SOLUTIONS. So, in this blog I am going to share a practical living application that has assisted and supported me to be more immediate, and direct when it comes to handling problems that open up in my world – and walk them into a SOLUTION.

I will share a short story from my own life that will serve as an example of this practical application: I am at the moment building an expansion to my mother’s farmhouse. The plan is that my partner and I are going to live here, and share the spacious farm environment together with my mother. It is really a fun process to be part off. Though, when it comes to building, and acquiring a house like this, it requires a lot of capital, and because of this my partner and I have had to take on a loan. And today is I was looking at the building site, and the development of the expansion, a anxiety come up from within, and it went like this: “Oh, we are taking on so much debt to be able to do this! Shit! I could have decided to live more cheaply! Man, now I will be stuck with this for a long time!”

When that thought, and energy came up within me, initially I went into it. Then I applied self-forgiveness, and instead of continuing to exist in a state of worry/anxiety I began to look at a SOLUTION. Hence, I asked myself, what is the solution to this problem I am facing? And I realized that, instead of worrying about what this project costs, I can appreciate the fact that I do have the opportunity to do something like this in my life, and really involve myself in the construction of my future abode. And instead of looking at the debt as a point of pressure, see that me taking on this debt does allow me to walk, and experience a cool process of creation together with my partner. Thus I am in an optimum position to actually create, and be part of building the future of my life from the ground up, because an important part of my future will be my house, where I am going to live.

When I realized this, I could see that it was up to me to define WHO I AM in relation to this project that I have committed myself to walk. And I understood that I must make the decision, and unless I do that, my circumstances will do it for me. But do I want to walk through my life and feel pressured just because I have debt? No – I want to be able to live, and appreciate the environment and the life I am creating for myself. Hence the solution to my problem is to live this appreciation, this enjoyment, and push myself to explore and participate in this adventure that is unfolding day by day.

This is thus an example of the practical application of how we are able find SOLUTIONS to the inner conflicts we face. I have practiced the point of immediately as a reaction comes up within me, apply a self-forgiveness statement, and then look for, and live a solution. It is not as easy as it sounds, but developing such a skill is priceless – and really – it is what we as humanity needs to create. We are too much in love with our problems and it is not good for us – thus as a rule of thumb – I suggest that we place the focus in our minds 90 % on solutions, and only 10 % on finding and gauging problems.

Day 261: Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance

In this blog we are going to look closer at some practical solutions for resistance, that I have found works effectively. There are four applications that I have discovered helps a lot when that resistance comes up from within – and I will be walking through them in order.

Be clear on you new direction

The first solution is to be clear on your direction. In order to be able to walk through that tough, and difficult moment, when the resistance comes up, and you do not feel like doing anything, it is important that you have your direction in place. Basically this means the following: You know WHY you are changing, you know HOW you are going to change, you know WHAT will happen if you do not change (consequences) and you know WHAT will happen if you change (rewards).

If you are not clear on these points within yourself, you are going to find it much easier to give in, and give up when the resistance towards movement comes up from within. The reason for this being that you have not established a purpose, and reason for yourself, you are trying to change something, yet you are not entirely clear on why, how and what you are changing. Thus, my suggestion is that you sit down with yourself, and write out your reasons for changing.

Lets take an example from my own life, my law-studies. Now I experienced resistance towards studying and reading the course literature, though I knew that I had to do it in order to be able to pass my exams. Thus, I wrote about the point and established the following: I am changing this resistance into actually reading my books BECAUSE (why) I want to be able to earn my living as a lawyer. I will change this resistance through (how) sitting down and reading my books for two hours every day. If I do not do this for myself, I might not be able to pass my exams, and thus I cannot become a lawyer (consequence). Though if I do sit down and read the literature, I will pass my exams, and be able to have a enjoyable and challenging job in my future (reward).

Placing it before myself in this way I was able to clearly see the value in changing myself, and why I had to do it – and this helped me to push through in those moments when I did not feel like reading or putting down any time in my education.

Stick with your body

The next solution is to Stick With Your Body. Now, what does that mean? Well, look at it this way: Resistance is a energy that comes up from within, telling you to act and behave in a certain way – and this energy will feel real and overpowering when you go into it, start feeding it, paying attention to it, and change yourself according to it. But, if we take a look at your physical body – you will see that regardless of the resistance that comes up within you, it will still be there, the heart will still be beating, lungs and breathing working perfectly – most parts of the body will be stable, still and the same as before the resistance – and this is important to notice.

Resistance as such does not affect the body and instead the body moves itself on the basis of practical considerations, and if it would not do that – we would be dead a long time ago. Thus, if you, instead of going into the resistance energy, place your focus and attention on your breathing, and the sensations of your physical body – this will allow you to use the body as a point of grounding/stabilization. And when you stand with the body, on the ground, you are going to notice a fascinating thing: The resistance does not have power over you – it is only a energy – and regardless of its intensity you are still able to decide on how you move within and as your human physical body.

To sum it up: The body/physical matter transcends resistance – and when you stand with the body – you will be able to use its stability and groundedness to support yourself to move through the resistance and come out on the other side.

Know your enemy

The third solution is to know your enemy, and with this I do not mean that you should go into war with resistance and your mind – no – what I mean is that it is important to understand how resistance moves, and when it moves. My observations on this point is that resistance moves in quickly, and will peak after a while, but if you continue to move through the resistance, it will run out of fuel and die out. As such – resistance does not last – it has a due date and if you stick to your guns, and continue to move, resistance does not stand a chance.

Accordingly it has been supportive to me to, every time a resistance comes up within me, say to myself that: ‘Okay, here are you resistance – though you will not be here for ever!’ – and then I continue to push and walk through the experience. This helps because you get to understand that even though it feels overwhelming and tough, there will come a moment when the resistance is going to dissipate and you will be home through.

And then – its also supportive to know WHEN the resistance usually arise, because then you will be prepared, you will know what is coming, so that you can implement your new direction immediately as you sense that lingering urge to just not do whatever it is that you are supposed to be doing.

Just do it

The last point, and possibly the most potent of all the solutions I have walked through, and by far the most simplistic, is to: Just do it. No rocket science here – though fascinatingly enough – we tend to forget this fact and instead of moving, and directing ourselves in the physical, we start asking ourselves why we do not change, if there is something we have missed, or if there is something wrong with us, because we just cannot seem to change. I am here to tell you that there is nothing wrong with you; all you have to do is to do it. When you resist something, you take a breath, and move yourself to do it. It cannot be simpler.

So, when you find that you are wondering, or looking at potential reasons as to why you are not becoming more disciplined, then you know that ‘Shit! I am not actually DOING it!’ – and this serves as a nice alarm to know that its now time for you to get on with the doing – stop thinking about it – Just do it!

Next blog

So, these are my four practical solutions for dealing with resistance. Test them out, play around with them, and see what works for you. Maybe you will find that a combination of the applications or slightly changed application will work better for you. Transcending and learning to direct resistance is a personal process, and thus what works for me, does not necessarily have to work for you – though at least you know have some basic tools that you are able to start with.

In my next blog I am going to go into and explain the Rewards that come when you start moving through resistance, and begin your life of self-creation – it is a truly remarkable experience and the blog will definitely be worth reading.

Creating Movement – Part 1: Introduction
Creating Movement – Part 2: How laziness is created – external causes
Creating Movement – Part 3: How Laziness is Created – Internal Causes
Creating Movement – Part 4: Learning To Handle Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 5: Practical Solutions for Resistance
Creating Movement – Part 6: Baby Steps To Change
Creating Movement – Part 7: The Rewards