Tag Archives: Vocabulary

Day 266: The Building Blogs of Life

The building blogs of life – what is that?

Consider the following: Who you are is made up out of words, where each word has a definition, and that definition can consist out of other words, experiences, feelings, emotions, pictures, or memories. When you move yourself throughout life, make decisions, create relationships, pursue a career, or commit yourself to a project, your relationship to this point in your life will be dependent on the words and their definitions that you exist/live as. If you accordingly have defined the word love through memories of being hurt – potentially – that word will instigate a fear within you – and hence – when you have an opportunity to create a loving relationship – you will experience resistance/fear/tenseness – because in your world – love is something you want to avoid.

On a deep level in ourselves, this is how we create ourselves and by implication, our lives. We create through the words we ARE – and mostly – we have copied these words from our parents. The result is that we become very limited – we have a limited input of words – a limited input of definitions – and few perspectives/examples of how to live words. Fact is that we already as toddlers integrate and become the words our parents live – as such it happens on a quantum physical level; it is not something that we do consciously. This is the reason as to why words are the building blocks of the human being.

Now, what I want to show in this blog is that blogs, are the building blocks of life. What do I mean by this? Obviously it is not any kind of blog that will be able to become a building block in our lives. The blogs we write must be introspective, self-honest, and focused on finding a solution to a flaw that we see in our character. We all have these flaws, yet most of us do not do anything about it – and this is why most humans live mediocre and average lives – they do not make the most out of themselves and their lives – they remain with their limited vocabulary – and their limited definitions. However those of us that are willing to see our flaws have the opportunity to specify and clarify what these flaws are in writing – through writing a blog – in this getting a perspective and overview of what it is that we are doing within ourselves.

When we SEE ourselves and what we do, when we see the construction of our mental world, our character, we are able to affect change – we are able to specify a solution and live/manifest this solution into existence. Without writing/blogging, this is very hard to do. Hence, each blog written from within this starting point of getting to know self, getting to understand self – is a building blo(g)ck of our life – of the new life we want to create for ourselves where we decide what words to live, and we decide what definitions these words should have.

Writing is one of the most powerful tools of self-creation that exist. Through writing our decisions down, through writing down our inner worlds, through writing down what we want to create, and how we want our life to become – we are able to create a extraordinary life for ourselves – yet not only for ourselves – but for everyone else in our life as well. Each blog is a stepping stone in the process of self-creation – each blog is a statement of WHO I AM and what I will accept and allow – and what I will not accept and allow. Hence, the creation of real life begins with words written down with the intention to bring these words alive.

Day 128: Vocabulary and Mind-Control

Vocabulary, words, and reading – why are these life skills so important to all human beings, and why are they in-fact a necessity for world change to take place?

mind-control2In order to understand this point I will share an example from my own life, in relation to making a decision in regards to career and employment. So, as I’ve shared earlier in this blog, I will soon be leaving the secure zone of the university and head out in the big world, in order to find myself a job and make a living for myself. I realized that I had to make some form of decision – at least preliminary – as to what I direction I should go into, because due to the nature of my degree, there are many possibilities, and a variety of jobs to choose between.

During the first years of my education, I came face to face with extensive marketing campaigns of some few select employers – and these showed a possible future of money, success, and self-satisfaction. Unfortunately these employers were the only one’s marketing themselves, and thus to me it seemed as if the life they presented, was the only one available to me, the only career that held some promises – while seemingly there was no other valid options out there. Thus, in facing the decision of where I am to go in life after my education, I experienced much conflict and anxiety, as I felt that I must really push and will myself to get into one of these firms, to get that career, and the life promised by them.

Then, I started to question exactly why it was that I desired to go into this direction, and whether it was in-fact a suitable point for me to take on – was this everything that there was? As such, I asked myself, what it is that I would like to do with my life, where it is that I’d like to place myself, what it is that I am good at, what I am not good at, and how I would like my life to be in a couple of years; and at the same time I started to investigate and expand my horizons as to the various possibilities that my degree offers.

Here is where it starts to get interesting, and it’s here that the importance of vocabulary comes into play – because what I did was that I started to actively investigate, read, find sources, and expand myself, and this expansion was in the form of vocabulary – because when I read – when I investigated – I acquired new vocabulary, and in that came insights, as well as a sense of clarity – and I started to see exactly what the various professions entailed in terms of workload, expectations, requirements, investments, and so forth – and in this it became much easier for me to answer the question: Would this be something for me? Is this what I want for my life? Does this align with what I see for myself in the coming years?

So, in essence, my ability to read, and due to me having quite an expansive and effective vocabulary, allowed me to expand my horizons, and see things that existed beyond my social networks – because fact is that: My social networks and the vocabulary, and information moving in these, are often limited, and one-sided – and when acquiring one’s entire understanding of the world upon the basis of these networks, one’s understanding and comprehension of the world often get’s compromised, which leads to ineffective decisions, and in consequence, a lifestyle that is not in alignment with Who you are, and What you want out of your life.

This is why vocabulary is important on so many levels. For me, an expansive vocabulary allowed me to see new aspects, dimensions and viewpoints, it allowed me to effectively expand my understanding of myself, and my world – and it allowed me to take responsibility for myself and my direction in life. But due to the ineffective educational system we have in this world an extensive amount of human beings are not effective readers, and they are consequently not able to expand themselves, and their understanding of this world – as they do not have access to effective information skills – which is a skill equal to vocabulary and comprehension skills. And this is the reason as to why so many people are unable to see, and understand that there are problems in this world, and why they are unable to question the system as it currently functions – they simply do not have the vocabulary to comprehend what is going on.

This is for example why many tend to slavishly believe the six-o´clock news, when the reporter shares that “we are going to war for our freedom” – or that it’s “communistic to implement a basic income for all” – they do not have the vocabulary to fathom how the system operates – that for example – there is such a thing as propaganda and public relations – and that most media stations are owned by a select few elite, and that most of the electorates in our government are bought with corporate money – they do not have the expansive vocabulary to question what is before their eyes – and instead they simply trust the information available in their limited social network, which is almost at all times effectively in the hands of public relations and other propaganda tactics.

Thus, acquiring effective vocabulary and information skills is vital for us as humanity to be able to get ourselves out of this mess – because when we are able to assess words and information effectively, without reactions, seeing the words clearly, seeing their intentions, their purpose, seeing the information in the context in which it is shared, by which people, and why these people are utilizing a specific set of words, and coloring their perspectives with various one-sided opinions – then we’re able to take self-responsibility and make informed decisions – then we’re able to stand up and question everything and everyone – and see whether or whether not the patterns that are currently existent lead to a world that is best for all or whether a change is required in the accept patterns.

Unfortunately, our education have been deliberately set up to dumb us down, because the elite know, that a human-being with a ineffective vocabulary, and a ineffective information assessment skills, will be easily controlled and manipulated – and that fits them perfectly – because they want obedient workers, and obedient consumers – so that they can make more money and live a life of leisure and power.

For us that do see this problem, we have a massive responsibility, because before us lies the challenge of educating the rest of humanity, and opening up their eyes to what is going on – we have the responsibility to re-educate humanity – and in this it’s paramount that we give attention to how the schooling system currently functions, and how vocabulary is being disregarded, and how the youngsters are being programmed into stupidity instead of being self-directed living human-beings.

Though, our first responsibility is towards ourselves – we require re-educating ourselves and make sure that we’re not manipulated or lost in some form of deliberate mind-control – and Desteni offers a free course (see here: DIP Lite) that will assist and support us to walk this process.

Change starts with ourselves, and this is not a platitude – it’s simple common sense – yet we must live this information, make it practical, physical, in order for it to have value – thus – let’s begin – and let’s change.

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Day 61: Competition and Infected Vocabulary

Competition – has been, and is still in many facets of my life my primary motivation to move myself.

How can I see this?

Well, I’ve become aware that there exists jealousy within me in relation to particular points, and beings in my world, and now jealousy is intimately related to competition – because jealousy comes up when I’ve lost the competition and I am now the looser.

So, what is it that I want to win, what is it that I desire to have, what is it that I feel I gain through competition?

It’s simple – it’s a feeling importance, of feeling of mattering, and of being someone; so what this shows me is a fascinating point – I’ve defined mattering, importance, and being someone as energy; thinking that I am only able to be these points when I experience a particular excitement within me, and I feel that I’ve won.

Obviously, this is a misunderstanding of the words importance, matter, and being someone – because in essence all of these points are physical; for example – being important, or doing something important is simply considering and walking a practical, physical point that have a influence on myself or others – it’s thus me handling a physical point and nothing more; there is no energy involved, there is no superiority, or inferiority involved – it’s simply important.

The point of mattering – this is clear, because obviously I am able to matter without having a experience. Actually, I am mattering in all moments whether I want it or not, because whatever I do it have a effect that is of matter, and I am here within and as matter – thus the point of wanting to matter is really delusion because I do matter in every moment, that is the consequence of being here in the physical with and as my human physical body.

pile-of-wordsThe same goes with the point of “being someone” – really – I am all the time someone – some one – one person; that is me and it can’t be changed – I am some one. Thus – trying to become someone is really delusional, and it’s not really about becoming someone, it’s about having a particular energy that I’ve defined as being “someone” – while in-fact I can live, or I do already live, being someone in every moment of breath.

Thus – what I am able to see is that I’ve misunderstood words, and created false, and ineffective definitions of words, which have made me misinterpret, and misunderstand reality, and made me ineffective in living – because I am searching for, and trying to live out my illusion, while this will obviously clash with the actual physical reality that is not of illusion.

This also shows the importance of clearing, and purifying one’s vocabulary, because the vocabulary is one’s MAP – it’s the GPS that one use to guide oneself in this physical reality, and when this point consists of false information, one’s living, and one’s course in this physical reality will be equal and one, false and misdirected.

Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create, and participate within and as in-effective, dysfunctional, and false definitions to the words of importance, matter, and being someone – thinking, perceiving, and believing that I must be something else, and must generate some type of energetic possession within me in order to live these words – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give my vocabulary ineffective definitions, and bias my vocabulary to exist within and as energy, and experience, instead of seeing physical reality direct here without interpretation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand how it is that I’ve limited myself through infecting my vocabulary with definitions that are not sound, specific, physical, and direct – but instead defining my words within and as energy – as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that being important is a actual physical point that doesn’t make one more, or less than – but it’s simply a physical definition as being important; as having responsibility for a point that have a substantial effect on the physical reality and thus must be directed – that is important

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that value of having a clear vocabulary, and understand that my effectiveness in this world will not be optimal unless my vocabulary is optimal, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is something wrong with me when I have experiences, when I do not seem to be able to function in this world properly, instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that there is nothing wrong with me, but there is something wrong with my GPS, which is my MAP of this world, which is my vocabulary, because this point has not been installed, directed, and specified properly and thus I have not effective guide in this reality

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that this point of competition that I am facing, is in-fact not implying that there is something wrong with me, that I am bad, and that these reactions of competition imply that I am a naughty, and immoral person – it simply shows me that I’ve aligned myself with an ineffective definition in relation to the point of competition, wherein I’ve allowed myself to define interaction, and moving myself with others to be a competition, and to be infested with energy, instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that I don’t have to live competition in this way, and that I don’t have be enslaved to the point of competition as defining myself to a energy as competition, but that I am able to clear, and purify my vocabulary, and bring myself back here to breath, and walk within and as physical equality and oneness, here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself when and as I go into competition, and to immediately as I react within jealousy, or wanting to compete, or wanting to win, judge myself as being bad – instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that it have nothing to do with being bad, being wrong, or being evil – I mean it has to do with my programming, and how I’ve programmed my vocabulary to be in conflict with reality as the physical, thus generating energy instead of aligning my vocabulary with the physical, allowing myself to move in oneness and equality with what is here, and to see what is here without interpretation but see directly without bias, or judgment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself when I go into jealousy, instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that jealousy is nothing bad, but it’s in-fact only a product of a misalignment in my vocabulary as my physical living – and as such I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that this misalignment is about how I’ve defined myself to be inferior, and less than others, thinking that I must fight to prove myself, to be seen, and to be noticed – and unless I am – I am apparently completely worthless, and without any form of value; and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program myself to compete, too fight, and to struggle, instead of remaining here and walking with and as my human physical body as what is best for all, thus re-defining my vocabulary to be in alignment with the principle of the physical as what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the competition I experience is real, is factual, is actual, and is something that I must define myself according too, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that this point of competition is in-fact completely false, it’s only a outflow of a misaligned point of vocabulary and is thus a illusion that doesn’t in-fact exist, it’s only a repercussion because I’ve allowed myself to live in conflict with and as the physical as what is real; and thus I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to re-align my vocabulary, to instead of looking at other human beings within and as the starting point of competition, to instead look at other human beings from a starting point of learning from them, from a starting point of seeing their strengths and making their strengths mine, and seeing their weaknesses and making sure that I don’t accept and allow the same points of weaknesses within and as me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand how it is that I’ve in-fact held myself back from changing myself, and re-aligning myself into and as physical living, because I’ve judged myself for my reactions, and focused all my attention unto my reactions, instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that my reactions are not the origin point – my reactions are in-fact the outflow of me already having made decisions within me, and already having moved myself in such a way that I’ve stood in conflict with and as the physical and within this generated, and created energy – as such I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not bring myself back here, and to understand that reactions aren’t bad, but that they show me that there is work to be done, wherein I must align my practical physical living to be what is best for all with and as the physical here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself, and have myself go through pain, and hell – through me judging what I’ve become as a reactive being, as a system, instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that judgment is a inferior way of dealing with, and walking the point of self-change – and what must be lived for change to become a manifest reality is understanding, and is gentleness – wherein I must get to know the mechanics of myself, and learn to operate myself in such a way that I do not generate energy as conflict – but that I live here within and as the physical in every moment of breath as what is best for all

Self-commitments

When and as I see that I am living the words importance, matter, and being someone – as wanting and desiring to have attention, to be seen, and to experience some type of energy – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how I’m within this living false, infested definition of the words, that are not aligned with and as physical reality – as such I commit myself to delete, and remove these definitions and live importance, matter, and being someone as actual physical expressions HERE – that have a clear definition that is practically effective in my day to day life

When and as I see that I am limiting myself through living myself as vocabulary that is infected with energy, as experience, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that this is the reason as to why I experience myself unstable, it’s because my vocabulary is not in itself stable but in-fact infected with misaligned definitions, and filled with assumptions and no direct reality relationship; as such I commit myself to live words as their actual physical meaning – and to not anymore live words as a energetic experience

When and as I am judging myself when I have reactions, and I blame myself that I go into competition, or act in a way that is not best for all – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how this way of living, and interacting with myself is in-fact not taking into consideration how it’s not something wrong with ME per say, but something wrong with the instructions I’ve given to myself, as my vocabulary; as such I commit myself to re-align my vocabulary as what is best for all – and to understand that my reactions are indicators as to where I’ve not yet changed my vocabulary to be clear, specific and what is best for all

When and as I see that I go into a state of competition, as wanting to prove to others that I am the best – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that the idea of competition is a creation of the mind, as a misinterpretation of reality – wherein I’ve defined reality as being a struggle instead of realizing that reality is simply reality and that I am actively creating it to be a struggle; as such I commit myself to re-align myself with and as the physical and to stop competition and instead push myself to learn from others

When and as I see that I am blaming, or judging myself for going into a reaction, or experience, wherein I for example become jealous, or I go into competition, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how this point of blaming myself is ineffective, and it doesn’t make sense – because what is happening is that my vocabulary is not properly aligned, and I mean this is nothing bad, or wrong, it’s simply a mechanical error that must be corrected through willing myself to in actual physical reality change my living statement of myself into and as what is best for all; as such I commit myself to instead of judging myself re-align my vocabulary as my living to in every moment be what is best for all – and do so through re-directing myself within and as breath HERE

When and as I see that I struggle, fight, and combat myself within myself, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here, and I see, realize, and understand that self-change is not about fighting myself, it’s about changing myself – which is not a fight but it’s decision – and this decision is the lived here as one direction, wherein I instead of fight my ineffective points within me – direct these points as myself – and thus this is the difference between fighting, and directing – that in directing I take control, I take responsibility, I stop blaming, and I stop feeling less than, and I in-fact walk through the pain of self-change – through simply in every moment taking the responsibility to direct myself in a way that is best for all

When and as I see that I am looking at others, and their participation from a starting point of competition, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that competition doesn’t benefit me, or this world as a whole – and that I am able to in-fact utilize the example of others to expand myself, through learning from others, instead of fighting and competing with others; as such I commit myself to actively learn from others, and to utilize this point to change myself in the moment when I notice I go into competition – to ask myself – what can I learn from thus human-being and how can I apply it in my own life?

When and as I see that I go into judging my reactions, and reacting in relation to my reactions, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how I am within and as reacting to my reactions prolonging myself from making the decision to change, and to change myself for real in and as physical actual living; as such I commit myself to stop reacting to myself as the mind, and instead focus upon immediate self-change here within and as breath

When and as I see that I am judging myself, instead of changing – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how it won’t assist, and support me to judge myself, and that this merely makes it more difficult for me to change – thus I commit myself to move myself to self-change immediately instead of going into and as the point of judging myself when I’ve seen, and located a particular point of self-dishonesty within and as me

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Day 57: Life is a Struggle, Apparently

Okay, I had some reactions today – and these require direction immediately – so here we go.

So, as usual – the specific of the context wherein these reactions came up is not relevant – such as for example the names of the participants, or what type of relationship I hold towards them – what is relevant is to investigate the SYMBOLISM of the moment, and how this particular symbolism triggered some biased vocabulary I’ve created within me – wherein I’ve connected certain emotions to a certain defined moment as a symbol – and thus programmed me to react when a particular situation as a defined vocabulary enters my moment of awareness.

Thus – I will here in this blog work with this misaligned vocabulary.

struggle_by_exeart-d527rzlOkay – so what is the symbolism of this moment? Well – I am able to see that the general symbolism of the moment was that it was a conversation, and in this conversation I was stable, and at ease within and as my application until a certain point emerged – which was as I perceived it: criticism, and disagreement – and within this I experienced myself de-pressed – meaning essentially as if I was being energetically pushed downwards within myself; what I am able to see is that I in the moment wanted to blame the other participant in the conversation – though this is not valid because what is to be realized is that this moment is a symbol – it thus represents a particular issue I’ve created within me towards particular vocabulary.

So, I am able to see that when I perceived that I was being criticized, and another disagreed with me – I took it personally, and I went into a rebellious character – wherein I in my mind started to consider what I could say in-return to so to speak “turn the tide” – meaning – I interpreted the particular moment as a competition wherein I was in the loosing corner, and thus in order to win I had to in someway get myself to the other corner – through speaking particular words and in that having the other participant experience themselves de-pressed – so that I could feel up-lifted.

It’s interesting – when I find myself go into this competition-mode – I am unable to in-fact listen to another, I am unable to speak calmly, and at ease and direct the situation with a clear, and stable vocabulary – and instead I go into a defense-mode – wherein I feel that I am being attacked, and thus the natural outflow of this according to the logic reasoning of the mind is to “attack back”.

Fascinating though – that in “attacking back” – I in essence miss myself, and miss the moment – because I do not in-fact see the other participant but only that particular biased vocabulary I am reacting to within myself – and thus I lock myself into my mind – fighting against my own inner mental ghosts, believing that I am doing something “in reality” – while reality has already been missed because all I am doing is living out the past as biased vocabulary as miss-interpreted past events – that I’ve defined within experiences instead of seeing the facts of the event.

I mean – the facts of this particular event would be that I am talking with someone – and that what another say as words can’t possibly in anyway influence me on a mental basis unless I accept and allow it – it’s not like the words physically get inside my body and start to active particular experiences – no – this is my doing – it’s my creation and I’ve accepted and allowed this creation to become automated and simply run amok – automated to react to particular stimuli in a particular way – and in this case reacting through taking it personally and going into a competition- and defense-mode.

Another interesting aspect of this point is that the particular person I spoke held the symbolism within me as being “a close person” – thus due to this point I reacted more than I would’ve if it would’ve been a “stranger” that I spoke with; and this is because I’ve accepted and allowed this particular persons word to mean more to me, to be more valuable than any other persons word – thus deciding to trust this individual, and define myself according to this individual – in the belief that because I know them, and have known them for a long time – they are apparently a part of me – and thus are able to have a impact on me, and decide who I am; which is obviously a justification for me to not take responsibility for the particular dysfunctional symbolism that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to exist as.

Thus – self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to perceive a particular moment, and define a moment as being hazardous, as me being criticized and attacked – and that thus I must defend myself, and protect myself, and unleash my vocabulary as weapons that I use to disarm, and remove my enemy; and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that the only enemy that exists is the inner-me – is my mental situation that I’ve created through years of automated automaton living – wherein I’ve not effectively structured my inner kingdom to be aligned with what is best for all but I’ve simply allowed points to accumulate, and thus creating a energetic bias towards particular situations wherein I react and act irrational – because I do not stand within oneness and equality with the objective facts as what is here – but instead interpret what is here and act according to experiences, and emotions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive, and believe that when another does not agree with me, or say’s that I am wrong, and that I am not effective within a particular point – that this is then a deadly, and harmful attack towards me that I must in anyway protect myself from, and make sure that I am able to avoid, or at least attack back in the same measure to make sure that I don’t loose – and within this I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand how this point is simply not real – and that everything I experience is in-fact a mind-job – which means that what I experience is nothing but my own biased vocabulary that have become triggered due to me facing particular external stimuli as particular symbolism; and as such I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be grateful that this event opened up – as it allows me to go into my mental reality and correct the ineffective relationships I’ve created

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think, perceive, and believe that I must make sure that I in every moment cover all my bases, and make sure that my words sounds reasonable, and good, and smart – because then I will have made sure that I can’t in anyway be attacked – and within this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that this point of feeling attacked is simply not real, it’s a illusory experience that I create through going into my mental inner mind-chatter and from within there conjure a particular energetic idea of myself as how I experience myself in the moment – instead of realizing that without this mental conjuration – I am simply here as my physical body – and that this is the fact – that I am here as a physical body and as a physical body I can’t in-fact be influenced by the words, and behavior of another – unless it’s in-fact physically harming me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be unable to stand in the face of criticism, and disagreement – and immediately react, and take these points personally as they open up in my world, and go into a state of self-suppression, and self-victimization – wherein I limit myself in the moment to either fight back, or to suppress myself – instead of seeing, realizing, and understand that I am able to direct, and express myself here as I’d like – because in being here as stability I am able to be creative, and move my body, and the sound of my words – and the sound of myself – the presence of me – as I’d like – because I am not limited to external stimuli – meaning that I don’t react, or define myself according to external stimuli – but that I instead remain here within and as breath – within and as self-movement – and that there is nothing that can move me – and take me off course within myself

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to think, perceive, and believe that I require, and need a form of acceptance from others to be comfortable with myself, to be creative, and to be loose in my expression – and within this I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to place responsibility unto others to make me feel okay with myself – instead of me accepting and allowing myself to take directive of and as myself – and actively deciding who I am – actively deciding how I experience myself – actively deciding to live instead of reacting – seeing that living is acting in-fact wherein I script myself according to my awareness of what is here – and I do not re-act – which is me in essence simply regurgitating what has been taught to me without any awareness – without any presence – and without any common sense

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to learn from my parents that this world, and that living in this world is a struggle – and that it’s something I must come to accept – that each day, each relationship, each point in this world is something I must distrust – and fight; and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make my daily living to be a constant fight – wherein I must make sure that I win each conversation, that I win each encounter – that I make sure I leave within my so-called “pride” intact – instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that in seeing the facts of this reality – there is no fighting, there is no competition, there is no reason to distrust – because what is here – is simply what is here – and thus it’s to learn to simply see what is here and not create a particular experience towards what is here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive, and define living as a fight, and as struggle, and as something that is personally out to get me – and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear living, to fear existing – because I fear that at any moment I might be attacked, and I might be killed, or dishonored, or ridiculed, or de-pressed – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand how this is merely my biased, and distorted view of reality, and life – and that this belief is not in-fact true – because what is true is that I am here in this world as a human physical body – and that in essence the actuality of this world is created in such a way as to support my continued existence – and that in-fact at the moment my existence is supported because I have access to money – and thus my entire idea of myself and living is a falsity that is based upon a misinterpretation of reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to misinterpret reality – to misinterpret the physical, and to see what is here as feelings, and experiences – instead of seeing the actual facts of my world, the actual facts of my daily living and participation – and stop interpreting points in my mind as guessing what is here – as thinking about what is here – but instead SEE what is here within and as oneness and equality as simply being one and equal with and as what is here and thus having full understanding in quantum time – because I stand within that point of equality as realizing that there is no separation between me and this physical world, and reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe, and perceive that I am able to be defeated through the words that another use, and that I thus must keep myself on the edge at all times – to make sure that I will not be defeated, that I will not be attacked, and that I will be able to defend myself at any and all costs – and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a human of the human race – wherein I race to get to some illusory finish line – and that I attempt to reach this illusion first through fighting my way through resistance – not seeing, realizing, and understanding how this entire point is make-belief – and that I’ve made it up in my mind – that I’ve created it without awareness, and without understanding the actuality of living in-fact

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perceive, and believe that I am not able to function without interpreting what I here – thinking that my survival is based upon me being able to interpret what is here, and “read between the lines” as in seeing the danger, and the difficulty that might lurk around every corner of my existence, and that I must constantly be prepared that this point is going to come out and bite me in the ass when and as I am the last prepared; and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take a breath, and to bring myself back here to the physical – as living without interpreting but instead SEEING matter – as a matter of fact – fact being matter – and there being nothing to interpret because I see what is real and there is no point guessing involved

Self-commitments

When and as I perceive, and see it as if I am being attacked, and that I must thus use words, vocabulary, and my body to defend myself – and remove myself from the threat – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I am in this moment seeing not reality – but my biased interpretation of reality – as what I think I see; as such I commit myself to stop fighting – and to instead without bias – see the facts of reality as what is in-fact here – and to within this walk with and as reality – as the physical

When and as I see that I believe that I am being attacked, because I feel criticized, I feel attacked, I feel belittled, and de-pressed – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that there is in-fact no such thing happening, and that what is going on is that I am experiencing my own dysfunctional vocabulary as a dysfunctional understanding of reality that is based on feelings and not on facts; as such I commit myself to align myself with reality – and see what is in-fact here – and give proper definitions to what is here – understanding that a attack as a in-fact physical attack towards me that is able to harm me – while speaking is communication that regardless of it’s intent can’t in-fact physically harm me; as such I commit myself to live HERE direct – without interpretation – and instead SEE the facts – and not go into the feelings

When and as I see that I am placing my words to cover all bases, that I act and behave to protect myself from an eventual attack; I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how this is in-fact paranoia – meaning – a para-normal point that I accept and allow to influence me within and as my physical living here; as such I commit myself to breath – and to live with and as the physical – to speak naturally and comfortably with and as my physical body – and not fearing eventual points that might come into my world – but instead trust that I will simply stand and direct myself here within and as oneness and equality as breath

When and as I see that I am reacting, and taking disagreement, and perceived criticism personally, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I am in this moment in-fact creating a make-belief reality – wherein I am seeing what is here through the eyes of misinterpreted vocabulary as not in-fact understanding the meaning of words but only seeing my biased definition of words; as such I commit myself to re-align my living to the physical as being and living here within and as the physical – and not accepting and allowing myself to live through, and as a interpretation as the mind

When and as I see that I am re-acting – to apparently defend myself, and protect myself from criticism, and disagreement – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand how I am in this moment accepting and allowing myself to interpret life, and living as a struggle, and fight that I must push myself through else I will be devoured by this evil reality – and within this I commit myself to bring myself back here and to live in seeing that living is only a fight, a struggle, and a competition when I see living that way – and I deliberately create that experience through thinking about it; as such I commit myself to live without thinking – without interpreting – but instead see directly what is here

When and as I see that I am fighting what is here, and attempting to protect, and defend myself from what is here – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that it’s simply irrational to fight what is here – because in fighting what is here I am merely trying to defend my own fears, and anxieties – and I am not in-fact learning to direct what is here – and thus I create conflict, and friction – and make my life generally uncomfortable simply because I do not direct – but instead fight; as such I commit myself to practice directing – and practice moving myself, and my world as self-direction within oneness and equality as breath

When and as I see that I am perceiving, and defining living as a fight, and as a struggle – that is personally out to get me – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I am within and as holding unto such a view of reality in-fact limiting myself extensively, because I am looking at the physical with these biased eyes wherein I only see what I want to see – instead of seeing in-fact what is here in this moment; as such I commit myself to stop seeing, and looking with biased eyes – and instead see, and look at what is here directly – within and as common sense

When and as I see that I am interpreting what is here, and I make guesses, and assumptions as to the function of reality, and as to what it is that I am seeing – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I can’t in anyway trust my eyes – when I accept and allow myself to only see my own interpretations and guesses – and in essence see the information that I’ve decided to be correct instead of remaining open and in-fact seeing what is here in this world and reality

When and as I see that I go into a state, and belief that I am able to be defeated, deflated, and disempowered by the words that another use, I immediately stop myself, I take a breath and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that this particular idea is in-fact a justification for me to go into a self-victimization, and depression character – wherein I feel, and think that I’ve been defeated – as such I commit myself to stop this particular point of searching for a reason to feel depressed – and instead commit myself to live and breath as stability, and as the physical in every moment

When and as I see that I believe, and think that I am not able to function, and live properly without interpreting what is here – I immediately stop myself, I take a breath, and I bring myself back here – and I see, realize, and understand that I am within and as this particular moment justifying why I should remain limited, why I should remain in a illusion – and I mean the only reason I’d like this is because I’m comfortable to this point, I’ve gotten used to it and I don’t really want to practice seeing reality as it is but instead hold unto my illusion; as such I commit myself to push through the resistance and develop a seeing that is direct – that is in-fact seeing the facts of this physical reality and not the feelings I’ve created within me as interpretations of reality

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